I hate it when people look behind bright smiles;
when they look at the underpainting of my heart
and find that there’s nothing behind my laughter
but empty white that lacks dream or purpose
and was only born to remain hidden.

The silver shore is calling me
A restless moon upon the sea
Your voice is waves against the stone
But I am drifting all alone
The lighthouse hums a mournful tune
It sings of love and dies too soon
I reach for you, a beauty glow
But tides will take what tides must know
Set my heart upon your sail
A lantern in the howling gale
Let love be wind, let love be sky
Without your touch the stars run dry
So hold me close before the tide
Before the dawn can cast me wide
For love is fleeting, wild and deep
A sailor lost, a dreamers leap.

I’ve
been standing for way too long
My legs
wobble and itch
For me
to move
  
My next
word shall tell a story
Of how
much I’ve faked
Of how
much I’ve pruned
  
My
father stands aside the altar
My
Husband in touch
Crying
tears of joy
  
How he’s
wanted me to be “normal”
I raise
my chin as I walk forward
I wonder
if my husband knows
  
The white
lacy dress dragging on the floor
The
white roses hiding
Their
thorns under my clasped hands
  
I look
to my right and there she stands
My lover
and bridesmaid
Watching
as I get married to another

Raindrops dangle from the gnarled tree's ripe berries.
Like suspended sparkling tears that revolt the fall.
As we falsely be merry.
Inevitably the teardrop will fall to ground.
Why did it cling so hard.
Below eyes of iris shards.
You might get an- oh be strong.
How dare you to peddle advice
Without ever standing in my shoe.
Tears hid inside veins, as words form lies.
A mother somewhere echoed- hide your teardrops.
Conceal your pain.
When someone asks how you are,
do they really care to know?
Pleasantries do not like mention of despair.
Once in a blue moon an angelic human creature may actually care.
To reenter the wound with you.