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Ignatius Hosiana Sep 2015
Since you are getting to know me quite well
And to know when I am and when I ain't myself
You're ignoring the signs of a looming hell
And getting tempted to think that with me you're safe
But you better know there's a monstrous side
That lives behind this shining warm moon you see
There're moments when its not me to decide
A time when I lose control over the sails to the storms at sea
I know its starting to feel comfortable for you and I
We are bonding more than I ever thought
And it all seems picture perfect as days go by
That we are meant for each other is one cheap idea you've bought
But the oceans and seas are rough even as you near the shores
I warn you, Love,my dear has never been a smooth course
Ignatius Hosiana Sep 2015
I wish we met when her tarmac road was still mellow
Then when she still danced to the Congolese tune "Mbelo",
I wish we met when she could not stare in the eyes
Right when she was too shy to tell any lies,
I wish we met when she was still under her Mama's apron strings
So innocent, when she still trusted human beings,
I wish we met when she did church each and every Sunday
And had no thought of bearing a guilty conscience someday,
I wish we met when she saw the world for her best, not her worst
When the balloon of her ***** wasn't yet burst,
I wish we met when her future was still blinding bright
Wish I'd seen her in the dawns of her life, not the nights
When she knew no whiskeys or beers but only Fanta and Sprite
So that she wouldn't get herself in trouble and drunken fights,
I wish we met when she still had dry “unkisssed’’ lips
When she thought kisses were an unhealthy swap of saliva,
I wish we met when she hadn't developed attractive hips
When she wasn't a depressed Heart-wreck survivor,
I wish we met when she still believed in fantasy and fairy tales
And had a honest fascination for cowry shells,
I wish we met when she flamboyantly wore her natural African hair
When she still thought herself naturally beautiful and fair,
I wish we met when studies hadn't corrupted her mind and stolen all her hours
When she still smiled at the sight of frail petals of red rose flowers,
Wish we met when the movie title that described her ******* isn't “Olympus
Has Fallen”
But probably “Hard Boiled”, “Only the Strong” or “Swollen”,
I wish we met when she had faith in things like weddings, when her soul was
a spring of hope
When she hadn't lost respect for such societal norms preferring to elope,
I wish we met when she still respected danger
And risked not accepting courtesy from every rich stranger,
I wish we met when she believed true love existed in the world
Maybe then she'd believe my each and every word,
I wish we met when she still honestly needed a friend
I’m sure I’d be there to love and care for her till the end.
Lens of Truth Sep 2015
Another morning,
Another short text,
I pour out my heart,
Yet I am perplexed.
The reply I get,
Is just what a sent,
A few words differ
to discredit my lament.

As midday comes
you start to come around.
But still in your words,
no passion can be found.
I yearn for the days,
that have recently passed.
My mind, like your passion,
has slipped through my grasp.

As night falls,
You become more familiar.
Yet still I can't trust you.
You're only her mirror.
Your goodnight seems almost perfect,
Like the ones from nights before.
But in the morning you'll be someone else.
Then we'll see what's in store.
Akhil Bhadwal Aug 2015
Do I tell you a secret
Lest you understand it for sure
My disliking of you is
An ailment without cure

Disclosing shared things
With intentions impure
I destroyed them right there
Now an ailment without cure

Ill deeds of thou
Filled my dislike store
And now it doesn't matters
This ailment without cure


|AB|
This is what it feels when someone takes your trust and kills it right in front of you. Blast them. Follows a b c b rhyme scheme.
Perception of the reality you show me breeds only distrust
Context : written on the train out of paris, inspired by a piece of graffiti on rue de ecouffe in paris, 'realize, real lies, real eyes' (or something like that). There have been many times in my life where i am around people and personally felt out of synch with them (even before i became clinically paranoid) or was in a situation where everyone around me laughs at something and i am the only one not to even have an idea of why it is funny or the strange 'usual coincidences' i put up with when outside my safe space and amongst other human animals. it got me onto the train of thought what if the masks people wear when thay are around me are all false, this would render the truth of my experiences invalid as for everyone else it would be based on lies? please note i realise all these paranoid thoughts are related to personal ego tripping so please do not think the context of my poems as part of the ego trip, i am trying to be more truthful to my self by exploring my patterns in this public forum. Please enjoy.
Sally A Bayan May 2014
~~~~~

Even at this point in my life, i still,
could never have my back to the door...
I always face the window
or the door itself...
When the opposite is inevitable,
there are no airs of safety,
or thoughts of peace.
What is it about doors, even windows?
They are supposed to be symbols
of new beginnings, new chances...
But why don't i trust them enough,
to have my back to them...
Like someone,  or something evil lurks,
waiting for me 'til i have relaxed my reflexes...

The door and window, i always seek,
always glad after I've gone out of each exit...

But then, behind you, no matter what,
there will always be another window,
another D O O R
                              O         O              
                   O         O    
                  R O O D...

I sometimes wonder:
is it the doors?
Or...is it me?



Sally

Copyright 2014
Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
***Some random thoughts that  came out of my mind after reading Gonzo's DOWN THE HALL. and while looking at the glass door.***
Selena Jance Apr 2015
I’ve been torn down when lovers’
knowledge told me not to be protected from
my faithless heart frame. It tells me that
it’s not built to last and was

never true anyway.

All these times that I knew in facing the mirror
every thought turned into that light, shifting
moments to disclose the deeper meaning of
just being here. Knowing this, holding myself in an

act of reconciliation, that part of me burnt out
my soul, bound to exile, dangling from me, is my
own self esteem. /Prohibited. No one whose presence
I feel can forcefully lift it back in, this heavy it’s my burden.

Nothing but true unadulterated love can
hold me, if only for the fragment it takes to
relieve my distrust, of anything, of all that is able
to console me. Then it passes and barely leaves

me only the memory.


© April 16th, 2015
It's hard to trust and love when you've been taught to hate yourself
Derekis Feb 2015
Live on.. live long..
against all the conspiracies.
Drive far, dive deep..
escaping all that you hold dear.

Running away from your perpetual fears,
hiding from the gaze of your judgmental peers,
restoring safety by going through anonymity's cloud
into the darkness, the scream chills aloud.

Mirror's eyes behold my shape,
it reflects feelings of other's hate.
Unable to find a place to escape,
doors locked all around but the cemetery gate.

I can feel myself being incomplete,
being nothing but a piece of meat.
Acknowledging the potential in me,
My only wish is for it to break free.

But stuck in my own darkness
I lie crying behind that heavy door
between the cowardly sheep and the lion's roar.
This started out as someone giving advice to someone else but then realizing the giver and the taker were one and the same.
kennedy Feb 2015
I see behind
Your vacant eyes
Right through to your core
There's nothing there
There never was
An empty shell
With painted sides
Masking truth
Hiding lies
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