Here I am
I seem to be
Dreaming about you
Filling my heart with you
Letting my mind
Bury thoughts of you so deep inside
These feelings
They ebb and flow
They will not subside
Is it possible..?
No no no
But could it be true..?
Maybe so
I am falling
Deeply in love with you
And you do not even
Seem to be aware
Or return my hopeless glances
You are dating someone new
Say it is not the reality
But I have seen the pics
In this equation
One plus one
Does not equal
You and me

Sadie must have been a lady
Who got tired of waiting and waiting
For a prince to come
Or really just anyone
To give her the time of day
And say hey
Wanna dance Saturday night?
You and I would make quite the sight
But, no, they tapped their chins and debated
So, Sadie's desire for a date was not abated
Instead she took matters into her control
And that's why girls ask boys to the Winter Formal

Why do you seem to hate me?
Is self hatred not enough?
I do not need your feelings towards me too
I can handle it on my own
One’s worth of bitter swirls
Of sharp and pointed words
Are way past enough
The daily equivalent
Of an unbalanced diet
Maybe you do not realize
What passes through my head
The part of me that sometimes
Thinks it would be easier if I was no more
That denies the selfishness of the act
Despite the fact
No matter how much hate
I know there are some
That love and care for me
And my death would tear apart
But it hurts so much to think
You are only using me
I am good enough to do this and that
But never good enough
To make you prideful
That I am your born from your *****
Instead one-hundred and ten
Is never enough
You want every last morsel
Of my attempts and efforts
Why am I never good enough?
I want to get along
But I can not simply watch
As your missiles pelt my skin all over
And break my heart
Or fill my mind
With an addendum of scorching lies
Like you it is in my nature
To fight back when I am fired at
You must call the battle off
Because I can not back down
Every time I have tried to drop my shield
To let us be on good terms for once
You have taken advantage
Of the opening in my armor
What does it matter though?
I have been fighting the bullets for so long
More than you know has gotten through
I am more broken than you realize
A surrender is not on the horizon
I will not give up the fight
Instead the bullets fired
By both outside and inside threats
Will have to bring me to my end
So stop the war now
If you love me in the least
Stop pretending you are like the other’s
And be what your title says you are
I need you to build me up
Even though it is you
That assisted in tearing me down
Because no matter what
It is your approval
That I seek
Every single night in my dreams
And in the day
So pretty please
Show me that you love me
Before I give up all hope
And you are embarrassed
That your only female offspring
Has been destroyed
And you held one piece of the key
To lock the new armor
And start her over anew

Sticks and stones may break my bones
But words will never hurt me?
You are so right
Instead they tear at my confidence
I feel utterly defeated
But the worse part is
These words
The ones that now circle in my head
Like vultures quickly to the dead
They originated in my own head
Words I began to say to myself
And decided they had the invitation to stay forever
Oh, it breaks my heart
How can I ask them to leave?
When I am the one
Who invited them over to play

My version of a poem
Starts with a verb
Or some word that is utterly absurd
Some rhymed lines
Interesting adverbs and adjectives
Thoughts and feelings on every line
My feelings don't rhyme
Why should every single line?
In mine
Every line a different season
Different feelings will show
Sometimes they stay
Other times they pack up and go
I never know
So I jot them down as they flow

Fill in the blanks:
I really_ you?
Do you too?
Multiple choice:
If I said I liked you
Would you...
A) Say the same
B) Run away
C) Or pretend I didn’t say anything?
Short answer:
Will you ever respond to this?
Or should I just ball it up
And throw it away.