Luminosity Cat

Luminosity Cat Apr 2014

I'm begging you to break my chains.
I'm asking you to carry my pain.
I'm sitting at your mercy seat.
I'm crying at your holy feet.
I cannot dance, and I cannot sing.
I know you have a plan for me.
I have heard that you have paid my fee.
I am trying to set my sight on thee.
I'm begging for eternal grace.
I need your help to run this race.

I am not about to get in a debate about religion. I don't care if you completely despise it. This poem describes where I am at right now. Yes, I believe that my God reigns, but I will not fight with you over it. If you don't agree with religion or like this poem, just move along. Simple as that.

#dance #religion #crying #grace #feet #mercyseat #holyfeet #fee

Luminosity Cat Apr 2014

Scattered Scars

Not a word has been spoken since that night.
The night where words ran wild, and no one saw the light.

                                         My heart is breaking from the people who leave.
                                             My heart was stolen by night's terrible thieve.

                          The secrets and lies that people deny.
                          The heart and pain that is dying in time.

The blood that is streaking across the skin.
The razor can't stop digging in.

                                                        Words of hate leave ink on your bones.
                                                        Wanting no more to pick up the stones.

                   I wait for death to take me home.

#lies #pain #death #razor #secrets

Luminosity Cat Mar 2014

Go

I knew you would leave.
I knew it wouldn't be long.
I just didn't imagine life without you.
Without you to sing your song.

You were there for me when I was hurting.
When pain was ripping me apart.
I don't know how I'll survive without you.
Without you to sing along.

I know why you are leaving.
I just can't bare to see you go.
My anger dwells within me.
I know it shouldn't though.

I know you aren't really moving.
You aren't leaving me alone.
Your just leaving me excuseless for me to see you.
I know its not on purpose.

I know facebook works wonders,
and our cell phones always can be used.
Its just not the same.
I hate watching you go.

I would ask you to stay.
I'd ask you not to go.
I know my pain is great,
but not as much as it would be if I asked you to stay,
knowing your heart is telling you go.

So, go ahead follow your path.
Just don't forget me and how I looked up to you so.
The tears I shed, you will never see.
I don't want to see how much I dread you leaving me.

#tears #leave #dread #survive #leaving #hurting

Luminosity Cat Mar 2014

Tearstained Dread

Drip. Drop. Drop. Drip.
Drops fall like rain from my tearstained eye.
I cannot hide.
There is not a soul in sight, but I dread the coming ghosts that hide in the night.
I run not from the ghosts themselves, but my past, that so haunts me like a parasite that infest in ones soul relishing on crazed minds!
I dread the waking dead.
The cells that captivate the soul into dread.
No guards stand watch over my cell of dread, but they aren’t needed!
I have no way of escaping my captors that rage the wars that festers inside my head!
Where can I run?! Where can I escape the waking dead!?
Tricky is the mind.
My perplexed mind plays tricks on even the sliest of people.
“Dread. Dread. Dread,” Echoes through my mind - perplexing me to dread even farther!
Until… Silence...
My tearstained eyes drip, drop, drop, drip no more.
My mind ceases to implement dreadful parasites that fester in my mind.
My mind ceases to work. The waking dead has caught up with me.
They had driven my crazed soul unto death.
No air filled my lungs.
Just... Silence.
I warn you -
When the dreadful night no longer wakes,
When thy sleep comes shy,
when terror turns to horror,
When thy tears fall while you dread the dead
Shackles will come to bind you in your parasite infested mind.
The parasites then will fester in your crazed mind.
Until… Silence reaches across your tearstained mind.

I posted this on my old account before I deleted it for a while. Its one of the favorite's I've written, so I'm posting it again. Enjoy!

#tears #past #silence #run #horror #ghosts #parasites #shackles

Luminosity Cat Mar 2014

Depression's War

Depression is a war that rages.
You either win, or you die trying.
You can't escape because it binds your soul.
The pain it causes is like a whip against your back.
The pain isn't as much physical as it is mental.
The razor is your weapon against the infection.
It is a weapon, but on your own skin.
You can't snap your fingers and make it disappear.
You can't run.
It follows.
You take medications, but where does it lead?
Some people think you belong in a mental hospital.
Others.. they just think you want attention.
Most don't even look at your past to see what got you to this point.
It leaves you friendless.
It makes you shutdown.
It leaves your smiles fake.
Even if the war doesn't **** you, it still makes you feel like you died.
Even if it doesn't **** you, you are never the same again.
It brings you the point of no return.

Luminosity Cat Mar 2014

Sleep

My only relief is to be sleeping.
When I'm sleeping nothing can hurt me.
I can't be angry.
I can't spend my hours crying.
I won't feel like dying.
I can't feel the emotions that ****** me.

But when I'm awake..
I can't take the pain the surrounds me.
I become angry.
I can't help, but cry.
I just want to die.

Luminosity Cat Mar 2014

I'm Tired

I'm tired of running.
I'm sick of trying.
I want to stop crying.
I don't know why I keep lying.
I can't keep living.
I know I am dying.
My time is ticking.
My God I'm denying.