a year ago
today
oh do you even remember?
it was a sunday.
the night before
we began our tradition
of acting before saying
of doing, without thinking.
you held me,
we blamed it
on the elixir of the night;
you took my hand,
i closed my eyes.
it was cold and pretty,
dunes and stars
and tired faces...
it was a heartbeat,
a thumb caressing my palm,
it was the first of many hours,
it was a beginning
in all its glory....

Touch me.
your body
of skin and bones,
your lips of nerves,
your eyes
of receptors,
cones and rods.
Touch me.
your fingers
of loneliness,
your tongue
of electric desire.
Touch me.
Touch me,
my heart of knotted veins,
my arms of weak resolve.
Touch me,
my trembling knees,
my navel of soft whispers
and my toes of quiet pain.
Touch me,
baby,
touch me.

Sucede
Que cuando yo te quiero,
Te quiero sin dudas;
Sin dudas de que eres mi debilidad.
Mi debilidad te doy;
Te doy una y mil razones,
Mil razones para que no te vayas,
Te vayas a despedir,
A despedir de esta locura,
Esta locura que me toca vivir,
Toca vivir así sin vos.
Sin vos no puedo pensar,
(Puedo pensar que no te voy amar),
Voy amar hasta tus penas,
Tus penas que son las mías también.
(Mías también tus manos,
Tus manos que me despiertan,
Me despiertan estas ganas de querer,
De querer quererte así)
Quererte así, es querer soñar con ojos abiertos.
Ojos abiertos, cuando me besas.
Me besas tan despiadado,
Tan despiadado sos vos….
Sos vos mi gran ciencia,
Gran ciencia es encontrarte…
(Es encontrarte algo que sucede).

I was born in a cold land,

The leaves bright orange like the sun

And a dusting of icy dew on wilted grass;

I was born in sanitary white and surgical blues,

Incubated, saved, isolated;

Mamá cried:

In the motherland,

mi Apá would’ve had to choose.

I was born into exile.

I was born to immigrants,

Brown like the dirt

Mis abuelos grow caña in,

Like the leaves, glorious colors past;

I was born foreign.

I was born in Español,

Accented with indigenous words,

Bastardized like our foods and dance;

I was born and placed

At the care of a deer’s eye,

Tied red around my wrist,

A wooden cross,

A brown ******,

A blue-eyed Niño Dios.

I lived in dust for 2 years.

I ran free, in fields of milpa,

In fields of caña,

In zocalos with

Colorful waving paper flags

And statues of generals.

I played with cousins,

Sharing bolis and nieve,

The hot clay burning our feet,

Racing to cool down at the spring.

And then I was brought back for school:

Los gringos van a estudiar,

They whispered, a bit mocking, about me,

4 years old, a girl,

In a place where girls were good for marriage,

University for the rich, ****** folks

Of faraway cities.

I came back to the cold land in spring.

A small barrio of tall broken down buildings,

Tiny apartments that became havens

At the sound of guns at night.

There was no more running around freely,

No more campos, no more town squares.

School was foreign,

There was English to learn,

A struggle to lose the accent,

To make the thick words

Comfortable in my tongue.

It’s a little complicated.
In July he broke my heart.
On New Year’s Eve he broke my soul.
And yet here I am wishing
That this year can be different:
That his vision of us walking around
Aimlessly, without conditions,
Can come true.
I see my mistakes
And his lovingly more
And i want so much to turn time back.
It’s a little bit tough.
A broken heart hurts,
But a broken soul
Feels empty,
Feels guilty,
Wet from the tears
And gone into depths
Of lonesome nights.

si nos vieran se reirían de nosotros
o mas bien de mi
acostados en el suelo
temblando de frió
buscando un poco de calor
y nadie nos va entender
que no somos el amor encarnado;
que no somos el producto del alcohol
ni del humo;
que no somos mas que
un sentimiento inexplicable,
que somos la definición
de lo incondicional,
y los limites se hacen menos;
que ahorita somos nosotros,
y mañana tal vez ya no.
se reirían de nosotros,
jugando a la parejita,
y tal vez no jugando tanto,
y se reirían de mi cara,
como mira la tuya,
parcialmente en la oscuridad,
con tristeza, remordimiento, cariño y decepción
y como tu te fijas en
los sismos que empiezan
de las rodillas hacia fuera
de mi…
y se reirían de como
algo tan disparejo como nuestra estatura
se concilian
al danzar eso prohibido por los dioses
mas
ya no son palabras de tu boca
ni promesas de tu corazón;
son la letra de esta canción
que tarareaba de hace tiempo
y ya se
que se reirían de mi,
porque esto no tiene remedio,
que tu y yo estemos tan unidos
de esta forma desafiante a lo normal
y que me importa?