The time I spent with you I never regret.
I learned so much about myself in your presence,
and more than I could have imagined,
I fell in love with someone I wanted to spend forever with.
Ironically though forever now seems impossible.
Every day is a waiting game,
and I do not know if this second will be the last.
So I turn away.
Leave behind what made me so happy.
And all the memories I’ll treasure
will only remain as that.
I do not want you to see me the way I will become.
Goodbyes laced with anger will hurt far less than a goodbye at the edge.
And I’m sorry it’s come to this.
I’d turn my days around if I could,
and all the lies would never have to be.
But I can’t hold onto hope when hope flickers so small.

Faster than ever the world spins,
and I’m barely hanging on.  
The downfall of this very existence has shaken me to the core,
and all the things I wish I could say,
I can’t say.
Even if it doesn’t make sense,
this twisted thinking in my head.
I’d rather be alone buried in the lies
than have you by my side,
tears and all.
Because if goodbye comes too soon,
I don’t want you to remember me gasping for the very last breathe.
And if my hold on this world lets go,
just recall the beating of my heart when you and I were so in love.

Shut out everything including the light.
Forget the memories we tried so hard to make.
Life was so much more easier yesterday
when worries were never too big to handle.

Twist the words that fall from your mouth.
Heaven knows you didn’t mean them.  
It’s far less painful to hide the breakdown.
Because falling apart would mean having to face the truth.

And the truth is what scares me the most.

Unanswered questions,
a life left with the inevitable.
Time keeps ticking,
each hour never feeling long enough.
If I gave in maybe it wouldn’t hurt so bad.
Maybe it would be easier than trying to hold on to a hope that doesn’t seem real anymore.
And the one I said I love you to wouldn’t have to cry for a tomorrow that will never come.
They could live their days without worry
while I quietly fall to pieces.
As sad as it is,
it’s for the best.
Because goodbye is a lot less harder now than it will ever be.

No...
Scratch that.
It doesn’t matter.
Goodbye hurts like hell whatever way you put it.
And it’ll still feel the same
yesterday...
today...
tomorrow...

Wings a tangled mess,
and halo crooked,
this angel is far from perfect.
With harp strings broken,
and clouds full of rain,
magic is powerless in this messed up madness.
Nothing will fix this once upon a time fairytale.

You say a word
and it falls to dust.
Might as well not speak anymore.
Because silence is a much better friend,
and loneliness keeps more company then anyone else ever did.

If you think about tomorrow, you’re halfway there. Hold on.