He told me he loved me so many times before
Yet I’m always left with tears staining the floor

What do I believe, what can I trust
How many more chances before my heart busts

The knife has hit many times before
Blood dripping from the back of the door

The door you slammed, right in my face
I cannot continue this cat and mouse chase

Every time you left
You took a piece of my heart
Do I take a chance again, or make a new start?

Don’t run off, I don’t want to scare you away
I’m sure you’ll have fun if you come out to play

My tongue is deadly
It’s a very strong tool
It’ll take over your body
You’ll be mine to rule

I’ll warn you once
My powers are wicked
Pleasures are many
You’ll soon be addicted

So are you ready for the time of your life
No need to worry, I won’t tell your wife

Today is truly all we have
This took a long time to learn
Make the most of the day ahead
Look for excitement around every turn

Make the most of every moment
Send positive vibes at every chance
Sing from the top of your lungs
Get up from your seat and dance

Smile often, laugh even more
Give a compliment, hold open a door

We may be only here for today
Let’s live a good life and do it God’s way!

The sun is rising
Above the clouds
Slowly it comes
Waking up the crowds

What would we do
Without its magical light
The world would be dark
No sparkling daylight

I can’t imagine a world without sun
I don’t believe I’m the only one
The winter comes and gray covers the sky
Enough to make me break down and cry

I need the sun
Like the air I breathe
It’s one of the things both my mind and body needs

Depressing is a day
Without the sun
Everything is black
Dark and glum

I will praise the sun
In all its glory
Appreciate its beauty
And end this story

I wish I wish
Upon a star
I had a magic cookie jar

Inside the jar would contain
Peace and love and happiness
No war, no crime and no more pain

I’d open the jar and let the rays out
To cross the earth, flutter all about

Touch everyone and everything
From the smallest grain of sand
to the Majestic Eagle’s wing

Until I find that special jar, I’ll bend down on one knee
And pray for that day
When all our troubles go away

What a wonderful world it would be
When I close my eyes, this is the world I see

I’m just living life a day at a time
I thought I would sit here and write this rhyme

Each and every day is full of change
From the smallest ripple in a stream
To the man I’ve been waiting for
Walking out of my dream

I live for change
It’s not scary to me as it is for some
Change can be good
Change can be fun

Change is not always great
That I must admit
I always have to be ready
For that next heavy hit

But for most of my days
Life is an adventure to me
I long for the excitement
Reach for the sky, and that next mystery

The sound of bagpipes in the air
The bittersweet taste of dark green beer
Leprechauns playing in the yard
Finding trouble isn’t that hard
They are doing back flips off the lawn chairs
Shamrocks flying all through the air
Time to let loose, let your worries be gone
Everyone get your Irish on!

Happy St. Patty’s Day!

I love cozy rainy days
To stay in bed in a happy haze
Nothing much I have to do
Just watch a good flick
And make love to you

This isn't what I wanted
But this is what I got
I had a chance
And I blew my only shot

It was all me
Didn't known what I had
When he didn't take me back
I had the nerve to be mad

Now he is happy
Engaged right away
I wish I could go back in time
And make it all ok

It's too late now
She's got the ring
I've got nothing
I lost my king

To be in love
To be loved
To cherish another human being more than life itself
To find that special someone
Is it only for the young?
What is young
I thought I'd found love before
The tingly feeling you get
When your heart skips a beat
When all you do is think of that person, hear their voice, picture their face
And life feels complete
Where is such love?
Does it exist or is it a fantasy which will never come true
How many times did I think it was you
But you left
No one wants commitment
Casual affairs are the trend
but I will keep looking for true love, until the end

I sit on the bar stool
In the dimly lit bar
I’m getting buzzed
I can’t see near or far

When did I lose my wit and charm?
I never heard a warning alarm
Drink in hand, shot waiting next
When did I get myself into this mess?

I put the glass to my lips, my only friend
It’s off to the races, here I go again

I’m scared to leave, afraid to stay
Uncertain if I’ll be given another day

I don’t know what’s to become of me
It’s getting harder and harder to see

I’m so **** tired of living this way
I don’t think I can handle this world of gray

I down my drinks, and then another
This life I’m living, I’m starting to smother

I feel myself falling from the stool
I only hear laughing
I pass out like a fool

Blackness is my only friend, maybe this is finally the end

I close my eyes and I can hear the ocean rolling up onto the soft white sand
I close my eyes and I can smell the salt water teasing my nose
I close my eyes and I feel the sun blanketing my body with warmth
I close my eyes and I hear the seagulls passing by

I close my eyes and I see you
Like a dream, you reach out your hand
I take it
My heart is filled with love
My body tingles

I open my eyes
I'm in my bed
Alone
I cry for the moments I had
With my eyes closed...

I look to the sky
Crisp and clear
I look to the clouds
I see a bear

The wind gently shifts
I now see a duck
Ready to fly away
Make a wish, bring me luck

The clouds are amazing
A painting in the sky
I can see the angels
I'm not afraid to die

I don't want to know what the future will bring
Live in the day, hear the birds sing

Every day is such a gift
What's inside is a special surprise

Live life rich
We only have today
Treasure every moment
Before it's taken away

Hopefully tomorrow will come
But there are no guarantees
So for today I'm gonna have fun

I'm alone again
With the Lord, my only friend
It's peaceful really, not at all that bad
I'm happy and serene, not the least bit sad

It's a beautiful morning
So thankful to be alive
No reason to fear
No reason to hide

I'm comfortable with no one around
The ocean waves, such a peaceful sound

I could stay here forever
In this lovely warm place
But back to real life
I'll have to face

I don't always understand why I'm here
I ask God, but He's not always clear
I keep going on, day after day
Waiting for Him to show me the way

I have to believe there is more than all this
These worldly items I will not miss
All these things fall very short
Of keeping me happy for very long

Always looking for the next big high
Maybe it'll be found up in the sky

I want to enjoy my life now
Live rich, die poor
I do not want to work until I die
Or retire when I’m too old to enjoy my life
I want to do what makes me happy now
Play now
Enjoy now
Live now
Somehow there is a way
I will find it

It's a beautiful day
It's the day you were born
In the glorious light
Of the new brilliant dawn

It has been one long mystical ride
How happy the world was when you finally arrived

The joy you bring
Is unmeasurable
the smiles you the bring
Make the doves sing

I can't imagine life without you
How much you are loved, this I know to be true

On this day
A miracle was born
That miracle is you

A change in season
A turning point in life
Where do I go
In the middle of the night

It’s time for a change
This is no game
I want a fresh start
I want a pure heart

A heart that hasn’t been broken
A hundred times or more
I’ve long given up keeping score

I just want a break
To start brand new
I can do it alone
Or do it with you

I sit and wonder
What am I doing in this life?
I only have one, am I not right?

I don’t want to waste time
With people and things that don’t make time for me
It’s time I stand up and set myself free

From the ******* of love
From the disappointments of life
I don’t want to have to use my knife

But rather go on
The lone wolf I suppose
Looking for that one pure rose

Is it you?

I felt bad today
Enough to almost throw my life away

In one split second the decision was made
To wait it out, just one more day

I wait for these feelings to go away
I forgot how to be happy, forgot how to play

Today I woke up
Happy with my choice
Glad I didn't listen to my inner voice

I thank the Lord i made it one more day
I know now I can do this,  I'll be ok

I dream of a place
Warm and peaceful
Ocean waves softly hitting the sand
While a warm breeze rolls softly over my body
Just enough to dry away the sweat from the sun’s rays
Which paint my body a golden brown

I open my eyes and I’m there
On a lounge chair watching the aqua-blue ocean
It’s soft, tranquil waves, hitting the pure white sand

What’s real, what’s not?
Am I sleeping or am I awake?
The lines of reality are blurred
Let me live the dream

I need to get far away
How far is far enough?
Another house
Another state
Another country
But how do I get away from me?
Out of my skin,
So a new life can begin
How do I get there
Only one way, I fear...

I need
I want
I have to have it
All lies…

I need to breathe
I need to eat
I need to sleep

Do I need love?
I want to love
I want to be loved
I want to fall in love

Do I have to have love?
Or do I want it so bad I’ll do anything for it
Is love worth the risk
Of that first deadly kiss?

I need to stop obsessing about love
If it’s meant to be, it’ll be sent from above

As I sit here feeling my heart bleed
I realize what I want isn’t always what I need

Is life only for the young?
Are they the only ones who get to have fun?

What about us over forty bunch?
Are we supposed be happy having jello for lunch?

I don't feel old
Yet the box I check does
What do I believe
Should I give up on love?

Who cares about the number
Apparently I do
Or I wouldn't be writing this
How old are you?

The bottle of pills are calling my name
That bottle of wine is doing the same
What's my preference?
Does it really matter?
Looking for that buzz in any form
Mix it up
Wash the pills down
Don't stop until I hit the ground

My only friends have lied to me
I thought I could stop, but how can this be
I can't put down the drink or drug
It's now become my only love

My only love is killing me
Anyone with eyes can see
What the hell do they do with me

Put me away
Tie me down
Unless I want this freedom
It won't be found

It's dark
It's night
I should be asleep
Nowhere in the house do you hear a peep

I can't stop my head
My brain won't turn off
As I sit here alone
In my dingy loft

Go back to sleep
How I wish I could
No one has ever understood
Why I'm up in the middle of the night
I try to sleep with all my might

So here I sit and write this poem
I no longer have to feel alone

I have been in love
I have been hurt
I wear jeans
Sometimes a skirt

I'm nothing special
At least not to you
What am I supposed to do

I'm just a girl
With a gun
I could use it
Or I could run

I'm just a girl
That doesn't care
I don't even want to brush my hair

I'm just a girl
Who put the gun to her head
No more worries
Bang! Now I'm dead

I look in the mirror
And what do I see?
Someone who doesn’t look a thing like me

What’s happened to this person?
She looks so sad
She must have been through a lot
To look this bad

Her eyes are dim
The lines are deep
It appears she hasn’t had much sleep

Her hair is greying, not the silver kind
Who is this?
Have I lost my mind?

The rain didn’t stop
For days it seemed
The **** busted open
And overflowed the stream

The rain is my tears
That flow down my face
You would never know it
My expression leaves no trace

The wind blew relentlessly
Swirling through the trees
Much more like a hurricane
Than a warm summer breeze

The wind is my mind
Which races up and down
Never feeling stable
I can hardly make a sound

The darkness took over the night
Not a star in the sky
No light to be seen
You can’t see me cry

The darkness is my soul
One giant deep black hole
No light shining through
Since I lost my darling, yes it is you

Endless possibilities
Are ahead of me today
It’s what I do with them that matters
I’ll make the most of them this day

I wanted your heart
But you left me your sock
I guess I was just dreaming
Do I really want you or not?

What do I do with this memory of you
I should just burn it
No that wouldn’t do

Might you come back?
Should I save it in hope?
I’ll sit here and ponder
While I finish my dope

I feel my life is coming to a close
People I haven’t seen or heard from in years are reappearing
Reconnecting
Where did they come from?
Why did they come back into my life?
Does this mean my life is near over?
Full circle
Ghosts of my past
Good ghosts and bad ghosts
Parts of my life I would like to forget
Why, why now?
Is this it, is it time to say my goodbyes?

When did a mouse become a device?
When did we forget how to change a TV channel without a remote?
When did humanity start moving at such a fast pace
That it seems as if everyone is running a race

I long for the days of playing outside
Riding bikes and pretending to hide
We sat on the front porch
And waited for our friends
We thought those nights would never end

Now we don’t talk
We either text or email
Everyone is inside on their phones, looking very sad and pale

When did we lose our souls, when did we say goodbye
To life as we knew it, I just want to cry
It’ll never be the same
It’s such a **** shame
I’m getting tired of playing this game

Life is too short
To be sitting behind a desk
Time keeps moving faster
Life’s becoming a mess

What did you do for the last thirty years?
Sit at my desk, eyes full of tears

All the young people
Have no idea
They have their sights on job and career

Until that day they finally wake up
Looking down a flight of stairs
Stairs to nowhere
They just keep going down
Until there is nothing around

Why can’t we enjoy our time on this earth?
Without the lies of job and career we’ve been told from birth

I really don’t want to sit and pout
But this desk work is killing me
I’d rather have the gout

Work hard and you shall have…
Have what?

I need to fly
I need to be free
I can’t be tamed
I’m the wild one, you’ll see

I love taking off
On a wing and a prayer
Responsibilities?
I really don’t care

I’ve been there, done that
So many times before
I’m so ready to just head for the door

So here I go again
Getting on the plane
If I keep moving, I won’t feel the pain

I woke up today
Good start you say?
All I want to do is play
But I have a very busy day

Work till five, commitments after that
I just want to hide, inside my hat

Take me away
As far as we can go
I need to get away from this hell and this snow

I’ve heard of a place
Magical it seems
Where there is warmth and sun and beautiful moonbeams

*Take me there
I really don’t care
All the things I have to do
I’d rather go far away with you
Take me there

I can choose to be happy
I can choose to be sad
I can choose to be angry
I can choose to be glad

It’s all up to me
How I choose to feel
I’m in the driver’s seat holding the wheel
I have the choice to turn left or turn right
I can make this day black
Or make it shine bright

It’s all up to me
It has always been
It’s time to start living with gratitude again

I sit here at my desk
I feel like I’m under house arrest
I’m stuck here for hours
Being watched and scorned
This can’t be the reason I was born?
To sit like a mannequin
Typing robotically away
Looking at my life
Fading to grey…

*There has to be a better way

Where am I going
Where have I been
Running in circles
Again and again

Trying to get things done
Do these things matter to me
Most of the stuff I can’t even see

So why do I keep running
I’m going crazy in my head
Soon I won’t be able to get out of bed

Slow it down, I keep telling myself
What’s the rush, there isn’t one
No one cares, I’m the only one

Burnout is coming, it’s like a freight train
I have to slow down, stop fighting my brain
Or I will surely,
Go Insane…

When you think it's all over
And you're done with life
Hang in there one more day
Put down the knife

Write a poem
Love yourself
No one else will
They can all go to hell

It's not over
Until the fat lady sings
Wake up tomorrow
And see what she brings

It could be magic
It could be real
As long as you like how it makes you feel

So wake up just one more day
See what the universe has to say
Is this reality, or am I a character in a play
There is no way to truly say

Keep on going, follow Her way
Just live and breathe, each and every day...

I’m done looking for Mr. Right
He doesn’t exist
I’m tired of this fight

So I’ll go on my merry way
I’m the master of my day

No one to report to
No one to pretend I care
It’s all about me
It doesn’t have to be fair

So I’ll stay alone
With me, myself and I
I won’t shed a tear
I’ll never again have to cry

I wanted it to be fantastic
But it wasn’t
I wanted it to be great
But it wasn’t
I wanted there to be more
But there wasn’t
I wanted some excitement
But there wasn’t
Was it all a dream?
That is the way it seems
I thought it was real
But it wasn’t

What is left
When there is nothing left
Nothing left to live for
Nothing left to die for

What is left
When you’ve done it all
Got up from every fall
Crossed the ocean
Crossed the desert to
What is there left to do

What is left
When I lie my head down at night
A few new dreams, all full of fright

What is left
Of me, my friend
When it seems I’m at the very end

The sky was angry
The wind howled loudly
The grey clouds swirled round and round
What would come next
No one knew what She would do

Mother Nature was strong and mad
Lots of tears fell, she was feeling sad

Chunks of ice came out of the sky
You could actually see the hurt in her eyes

She threw fire violently to the ground
With a brilliant light show and a load crashing sound

This went on for quite some time
Until the night ended and the sun came out to shine

A rainbow appeared
There was sunshine in sight
The storm was over
She made the new day bright

I’ve been trying to fill up my life
With people and things
The next vacation
The next boyfriend
The next new dress
What a sad mess

What do you do when nothing works anymore?
I’m tired of buying things, and acting like a *****

Nothing is thrilling or the least bit exciting
It’s getting boring and terribly frightening

I used to be able to buy something new
That would help keep me from being blue
Find a new man
A brand new romance
I’m too tired to even get up for the dance

I don’t know where I’m going
I barely know where I am
I am just praying
That someone has a plan

The sun rises over the vacant lot
Whether I want it to or not
I have no control
Over the sun or any of my goals

I feel like I lost myself
Years ago
I didn’t see it coming
I didn’t know

I am the vacant lot
Straight through to my soul
I can’t feel the sun
Just an empty hole

There is no warmth
Only cold despair
No one knows
And no one cares

So what will happen to me?
Whatever is meant to be
The sun is so bright
I’m blinded, I cannot see

Please someone set me free…

I wake up every morning
And wonder why
I am alive
And want to cry

Life is sad
Life is bad
Life can be joyous
Life can be free
It’s really all up to me

I can sit in my stink
And hate my life
Go ahead, and pick up that knife

Or thank the universe
For a new day
I haven’t yet been taken away