The church sets suns and moons, rivers.  

Raging and this
newly automated
and failing parts at to the newest river.
I defeat. I encase my linen and pull all manners.
If gore

If gore

Runs

And when it runs it tears down the scenic
route

Infirm trusts
all this disease fails

Aniston
A royal tribute and hospital beds

Emperor
But empire
Not for the freed ants the decent steal

Bit for the ears we've kept in between
The secretive
Pots
The fileting of a new sore

A not time night time.
And maybe.

Freedom exists.

Love.

Cans opened.

A blue door opens.

Lexis.

Let's us.

Record plump in Lexus.

Little he'll hurt.

A breath and my back performs over you.

I see no end in a silent thicket no one sees me.
The thorns quiet.
Why?

Yes.
Elevate my head and rotate my neck.
A blue twig blue with age and flame.
Blue for the message I did not receive.
A sound is etched.
Carnivals full of life, a maiden's fair breast.
Ancient tablature.
Fitting the lens.
Moving filth with tilt and focus.
An oar for each digit.
And each digit pulled from ore.
Children of a prometheal defecation.

P.m.


Perceiving all I can touch.
Marvel.
Cut the red carpet in factories.
A continent.

Divide and substract from zero.
If incorrect, rewrite and remember.

The heads and their jowls sag together under fluffy tempered weather.

Strung together by pearls as pearls.
In pearls.

A snake coiled between reef and coral.

I imagined and then begged for more pain.

The tape repeats that I imagined and begged for more pain.

But in the end did I imagine or did I beg more pain?

Petals fall.
The machine comfortable with its operator.

A hiss in the belly.
As in olden days the yellow humor is drained.
Is this self harm, is so be ye machine or man.

A woman knows no pain. Reject from census. Illustrate.
A butterfly found in a volcano.

Neigh.
Neigh for dark clouds all colts and mares whisper.

Just a cloud. As any other thing.

An argument stitched into this plane.

The past becomes a wound, weeping and gurgling.

Features of the brain. Festered.

The ears not quite level.

A fever.
A flick of the wrist.

The pinky nail holding a *****'s protection.

Catastrophe spelling itself as ***.


A petal falls there at night.
In the place where delegates made children weep.

Petals where tears learned to fall quiet and then silent.

My heart sings another's song.
Whole selfless faith.
An obstacle in its eyes.

Alabama flowers.
Mountains of metal.
Rumors of a wasp's nest.

Your mouth opens
and your feet trample over
past ones loved.

Your face,
bringing peace to Earth.
And to us far away.

With a wrist to shred
you remind me
there is nothing worth gaining.

So all hail the Queen that's never seen.

A picture for those darkest times.

A flower appears.
In warmth I fall.
Into blood and savage mixture.

So close to hurt.
And smile.

And to breathe.
Breathe you.

The strings below my torch.
Oh, I try to do and come undone.

Fade.

I pick at the scars in my heart.

Again.

I feel the twitch in your fragile hands.

You just need to think this through.

Throwing down your veins.

They're empty, useless & you're hurt.

with my fingernails growing,
searching for words,
the loud become soft &
my caged flex their teeth.
choruses of steel,
singing down our
warm corridors.
here & there.
a verse distant.
tempting a joyous song from
my cool lungs.
this is the golden wheat minute,
bathed in filtered sunlight,
smiles unseen & jokes of
discipline not unkind.
I am not alone in the only place.

A liquid shark live in
my glass house. who
held these hands which built this?
searching for anger snarling,
quick to investigate &
release. there it's found,
eaten & realized.
this is not his home
& I am smothered.
Can I sav?
I ask again.
I am standing, straining
for air,
abrasive winds cutting
into my shoulders.
An image lost & a breath
swallowed.

Leave the service.
Reverse your words.
Stay home.

The blood behind me kisses my feet.
With all the time never spent.
With all the words never said.
I look to my side & kneel.
Before a God too cocky.
Too proud to talk to me.
& with that said I'm done.
I'm beginning to see the light.
& it's so very sickening.
My stomach in knots & I keel over.
Heel Boy.
Now isn't the time.
She never answered that question.
You never asked it. I tell myself
Streamlined seems fine.
Whatever is fastest to get me
out of here, away from fear.

Blue is now the future. I wait.

It is the one who held a key and
fell to Earth.

A fool. A coward and now a
priest.

What horror must I fund for your
world to collect me?

I'm unsure when security made
its way into my pants.

Lesions and twenty two packets
of salt.

A man and his automatic
   revolver.

A subscription to Penthouse.

But the most wonderful time is
my own.

Proof that hard work and tireless
effort yields errors.

Quoting your favorite movies and
collecting different tastes in
fetishes.

A fetus and a geisha collecting
dust in a temple.

What pulls the thread from the
wheel must remain untouched.

It is like a season of poor
choices.


But what must go stays unsaid.


Example.

A group of people, forgiven now.
A couple, elderly but with child.
A man behind the street unseen but from one degree. Another man alone and staying inside. And what could that be inside a person's garage.
Forgiven  
Moving on
In quietly asked hush3s a
nd the performance begin s

The couple hiding and asking others about things with state men's attache ed
Pull me in a huneed pulls and I then discover amateur
Ambidextrous men some women
You saw the water when realizing

to chase gone


The bluest rounds of something moving again. And then something else moved alone
And then I believe it to be something

A stranger thing to be sure and then later on a newer a tore opens.

Maybe on this do range thing a few digerremy things Wil happen

D then a new
Maybe the is a friend in there
Or
Maybe there is a f fiend out yhwrr.
#Tragedy

Fight iron. Adjust the day's kick.
And kick and scream.

Dance, sing and shake
If necessary.

True love waits
It spins

..hiss..
(it spits)..
. . . . . . . . divine

But no one ever
sang or rhyme

My face blisters and bubbles
the collector at (of) midnight

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

my cupboard opens
my mask yes, sanitized
. . Me. .


What is love without us?

And draw the feeling of...


my voice sinking, falling

finally screaming at the bottom

...

outside in the courtyard
a raíndrop
collects all my thoughts

a brain spills
cosmetically
the owner shocked

remove your second tongue tie
speak clear

without a tear to drown your eyes

Jar mouth, your opening is not waste & free this curve.

Your wasted will stay dead.
Your wasted will remember.
Your wanted will return.
Staring at your potent weapons.  
Look through lead, end of tunnel.
****** adept.
You.
Scared of blank wrinkles.

This wave familiar. Step forward. It's beauty a secret shared tonight.
Begging & pleading wild ocean, on Earth I've learned all things you held & sold.
Dropping receipts & cowering behind dumpsters.

My focus secure, I drown in the crashing.

Nowhere you'll be.

Rust. Crates of dust spell love.

******* daggers fix your slips.
A thousand times this year.

The wounds on your heart claw at my desk.  

The black spills from your eyes.

We are left with a blue sadness.

My mouth opens destroying love. A fickle hinge waiting to rust.

Spit. Bring me life.

The police are coming tonight.

See the ink on my black denim jeans.

The boxes of empty.

You.

Panting.

Bloodied.  

Bruised.

A question will raise it's young.  

Above these confused waters.

Tranquil waters.

How will it speak when the day loves?

The nights with pool water.

Or speak secrets.


What is a memory if not dollars surrounds.

Earlier & earlier.

Proud guide arrive in decent.

Indecent time.

Stomach ace.

Three songs.

Stomach ache.



This bottle is a bit lighter.

Know its fall.

You've lost your glasses.  

A new terror.

Stop counting wedding rings.

Sand dawned.

Distillation.  

But.
.

But this sand un-stirred under the lake calls to us.  

My voice escapes its cave.

Flies with thoughts.

Sinks with you.

Wind dies.  

We lie.

Stop dear current.

Drain this home.

Search for initials.

Terror.

Find this new name. Understood. To be space.

Former years sagging.

Loosen our bounds.

Passing me in spirit.

Growing.  

Growing for each other.

Me.
And my teeth.
Dreams of simple love.

Live on roads.
Exist at home.
In your throat.

Your once happy ending.
A threat sears.
Blue.
Blue and true.

My teeth and your home.
And we hold.
Stimulate.
An ounce removed.

Sweat and move.
Towards others.
Above ourselves.

And my eyes remove.
Over and over.
Into grey pain.
Tear.

With split wrists & a frail frame I search for God in this endless sea of white. Feeling the sun on occasion. Holding her hand & she's sparing me the pain. Feeling lighter. Moving closer to that cherished throne. Wrapping wrists & I feel smarter. There was a day when I was happy. It's still here. Your picture still rests there & we'll start over. Making a mistake. I feel her warmth. Her laughing lips. Her potent ears. Her hair shines through the glass. I tap & she sees me. This time, seeing me. No more gazes.


So why does it always seem, that when I bleed, such weight is lifted?

Grind your lips, save yourself from total atrophy.

slavery and prostitution

Gazing, feeling nothing.
Their hums were working.
Now they hibernate.
Searched for laurels.
Waters from Japan bit my chest.
I bled & discolored the waters.
From blue to white.
I fear the charm has left.
Bereft of red strings.
There was a dream.
You said,
I had a dream.
Of my animals &
sharp objects.
Now,
she says now & I?
I was familiar with later,
tell me how to lose & I
I'll start changing you.

Roar.
stone teeth grind dully.
Dear.
flesh swells & tears.
Torn.
breathe aggressive heat.
Breathe.

I smell **** in the alley of my heart's apartment.
Lush velvet footsteps.
Concrete torn spines.

The echoes of last year pierce my chest.

In her pool I make contact.

One burst of velvet.
A taste of electricity.
Dead from above & the water closes my throat.

Three days & I'm born again.
I'm found, forever inside.

The future favors me.

A grave new Hesperian devil.

start in that precipice that separates innocence, ****** realization & that slippery ***** of *******.
@@@ a farm.
@@@ a wheat field.
@@@ a place free of distraction.
&&& an open place golden and ashen in color.
&&& a possible monolith
&&& maybe a tree, its branches reminiscent of those three sisters of fate.
@@@ there is dust or ash on the tree. It is collected over years.
Or it is collecting there now.
@@@ there is a monolith full of golden bars and it is burning
@@@ the monolith has been set on fire as a means to an end
@@@ Robert's parents die in this fire
@@@ Robert's parents die in vain hopes to secure his future.
@@@ Robert's parents die in vain hope to clean their past, to seal it. In other words to cut a loose string. In other words to tie a knot.
'

& I.
& I retrieve one capital memory.
of fire dancing in my youth.
a flesh not mine searing.
& no flame genuine.

& I lie down.
on porcelain grains.
visions of smoke.
a stench.
a desire.
a dead circuit waking.
my brain knows defeat.

& you,
ask me,
if I soar?
beyond great lakes
& before steel corridors
above a muddy fortress
& below bell colored carriages.

there. above.
or below. but with me at least.
at last you rest.
at last you're warm.
they watch, they sing & I mourn.
I wake & we sleep.
on beds of white leather.

& I.
& I walk.
& I run.
& I see.
& I translate cosmic mysteries.
& I revere your pain.

by way of the solemn.
more so than
by way of the brilliant.

emotions
not fully focused,
would perform deeds unaware,
evil impure, pooling and swirling.
young stagnant river, aging unnoticed under Missourian mountains.
take a stroll now to mend all your wounds.

from hope or pain you will close your eyes.

                                      coax today's life to a slumber.
                       know today's knife is your slumber.

I can describe no more detail.

take watch?
                      "no, not yet."
stand?
and we shall not kneel?
or bring arms for our raining March?
                      "no, not yet."
bend.

phantoms now.

over the timbered forests, a glow becomes a guide.

yes move towards and follow.
sever their source of medicines.
nod yes, smile while peace is burning.
cook fire
   and eat, drink to a merry dance.

a shadow watching you now.
your shadow so curious,
                                 betraying you now.

"home..."

cried for,
in wet gulps near black gulch filling
with you.
closest scarlet.

by way of the solemn, more so than by way of the brilliant.
it is tested again.
hypothesize
or abandon your
growing truth.

time proves its weight.
over and over.

this is now end.

One to Emily.
One for me.
Three bullets.
Five victims.

Emily and me.
Another love and she.
And you.

I'm writing this for you.

Starting to focus. Using my mother's strength. 
Converting a wrinkle's shadow into presence. 
I'm noticed. 
More important than working watches. 
New York City closes my eyes. 
Time is now kinder and kinder. 
Close your eyes beautiful. 
You've read every page. 
Skipping whatI read most. 

I swim in your sleep. 
Waking with flushed skin. 
Warm and with night's air included. 

You ask if I'm dreaming. 
With silence, your day begins. 

 Eyeshadow saved for these soiled days. 
The darkness above your eyes, convincing that I am the thief in your purse. 
Awake listening to all. 
Those before me, coming and going. 
And it feels to me, to be the correct way for this. 

I am told you have two hearts. 
One from before and one in your bed. 
Saved for later.

The last transmission.
In Heaven you will wake again.
Your ******* will flee and your eyes will close.
Demora the shadow will fall.
The light will cloak and strengthen you.
Your sleep will not stay.
Greet each other with pockets overflowing.
I am woken from my sleep.
Every oil shed of your skin.
A stench to remind those of all forgotten.
Destroy the monument.
To the fallen.
Require no payment.
With this silence in my head.
An observation may run free.
In and out.
With pressure.
Never.
without.

Six hours ago my bones stopped stirring.
And now they scarcely ache.

Three hours until I fall in love again.
Ask my dearest where they've been.
Travel & drink with the torn.
I'm coming home.
Oh Virginia.
Finish my castle to understand those sweaty nights.
Driving with tanks in my stomach.

I ask myself for death.
A final breath & fear quickens.
Rescue lives in this agony.

& so, I write these words on the flesh of your back.

When you remember me.

Here I am. Just as a promise.
Yeah...
still imperfect.

Yeah here I am, watching all those men say hello without goodbyes.

And here I am, a bit more together now.

Yeah I called, just to say my life folds together, inward now.

And yeah I called.

But not to tell you how pretty
and empty they're becoming.

I called to say that I called to say...

                         (I've)

Tending to a kitten's cry and not my oily hair.

Her eyes burn with an intensity
that yours never could.
And I feel alone.
With this frame, this pain, this agony.

I figured benzos.
But they burn oh,
Emma.

And love.

Feel free to

******

Finish

And I am driven for the great state that you hate.
No love for the furthest love.
What was that, it is now mine.
Constructing airways. Acknowledgment backfires.
I'm driving slow for reasons.
We storm the failures.
Deny accents, pressure & tolerance of age.
May it destroy your hair filled art.
No, losing sound and sleep.

It hurts where? Yes, it will hurt everywhere.
Stethoscope there in the room with stainless surfaces and a ticking,
No it is a tapping behind the walls stirring the blood snared along with something inside of me.
Potions and cures, then sealed containers of flowers and beakers locked away remain motionless.
As if hiding, as if afraid.
Rather, enlightened of the cells I carry.


Befriend the gallops of illusion.
Four horsemen down from the failing ceiling.
Postmarked dollhouse, scars on the ceiling, echoes joined to you at the hip.
Scars of the disease you carry and sprinkle onto chests like so many children's agony.

Hooves carry eyes to scan this barren nest of yours.

There,
the ruins of something innocent.

And there,
the photos of some memory discarded.

Assured with the reality that creation of life is but fantasy here, unattainable.


The innocent fall.

Smiling as they enter, your charms masking the smell of your closet's skeletons, a door revolving unhinges.

The coins you receive, coated in thumbprints and neglect. Mirrors of your frame.
A currency, your own currency of moans and gnashing.
Your small teeth becoming your permanent incisors.
Crumbling.
Powder then paste, yet you remain alive.

They become your master for sixty nine dollars.
They became your lover for want of a token.

Tokens forged in the booth appearing near noon.

Nothing else or again.

Then the drummer moves to erase the music of your past.

A vat overfilled with murmurs and spittle.

Your finished symphony.

And the most sobering thoughtlessness.
Wiped away by some nervous strike.

Tissue pillow and the awakening with your sun.
Window spirals and glosses this beauty. This sweet birth by a child's hand. A tin roof and glass walls.

Cancel event.

We decide to sleep.

And here. 
Among wights. 
Missing all tickets unsold. 
Calling all who lived and felt. 

It is colder. 
And the wounds are raising. 
And again with revenue as to portray. 
"It is gone." She says. 
And I dream. 

Of that razor to steal my heart. 
And who steals my blood daily. 

Though not as to compost. 
Poisoning flowers. 
Oxidizing. 
And fermenting her soil. 

Soon again. 
I will drink. 
My ears warm. 
The morn brings leashed air. 
A chuckle at present. 

Of the last. 
Of past words misunderstood. 

Once of four. 
And once of five. 
And yeah, we speak in high tones. 
In vague terms. 

Of times arrived. 
Departing flights forgotten. 

Many moments undersold. 

Still I taste. 
A forced kiss. 

Too loved to unleash. 
And so I wonder who said, "Who?"

Oh bother. 

Speech of idiots. 
Words ******. 

I deny all salves. 
All soothing. 
All encompassing. 
Sweet chestnut colored love. 

Curves to hold and suffer subsurface. 
Sans scars. 

Food tomorrow. 
After today, food tomorrow. 

I recall her taste. 

As recalled, I remember. 

The violence. 
And pride.
After the meal. 
The tears and the urination. 

After theft. 

I swam. 
With those who denied. 

And those who gave. 
Who took?

She sat. 
And I swam. 

And they spoke. 
The water. 

I emerge on new skin. 

Skin of those before. 
Of dreams wondered. 
Dreams failed. 

I pursued and entered. 

A feast. 

A drink. 

Soft pelts.

A bed and works of excuse. 

Drowned in water. 

Drowned in love. 

My sweet ancient temple. 
The skies of false truth. 

And the ******* of an angel. 

The miss of one married. 
Scarred. 

Loud speeches. 

Parades across the globe. 

And hopes of love. 

Goodnight sweet muse.

August Twenty Eighth  

Dear Icaege,
            
             my spine melts here alone.

Don't realize what you have please.
Because this reminds me to breathe.

Your lips.
Your scars above them.    
No less or more.

Stories that infect me.

My tense is past lived sweets.

With all the locks secured, having noticed my security, a voice whispers and life becomes complete.
Fleeting words, passion tumbles from the ceiling. With epiphanies, little rooms left bare for my own discoveries. The life of rhythm is disrupted. A new medicine for use in moderation.
A guitar, fragile with echoes of perfection.
But what else is there to keep?
A sunset fades and a new line is born.
This is what we truly want. This is freedom and a chance for options.
Xyz.
Consequence sings and I sleep.
My mask becomes me and we wake. But is there something else?
Complete with losing my mind before the moments find you.
Two songs play in the kitchen and my choice remains unsung.
Heros rush in and civilians wake.
Peace moves toward the light.
A silk blouse for the funeral. Only to fall far down the grave.

With a gift I move forward and destroy myself.
A beating of youth'youth's innocence.
The curve shivers and cradles this loss in rigid angles.
Doorknobs above this plane twist and turn in strange resonance.
Light removes our square from its rest.
The curve remembers this and falls in haste. Searching for new ground.

A page turns. A movement is born.

This hole opens. Chambers become themselves thrice over.

Something here causing mold.
Something changing in our voice.
Nothing strange, it's nothing noticed.
But it's not a thing that should remain so solid.
As solid in life, like facts. Those knowing there is strife.

"I believe this to be your own problem."
I tell my son this every night.
After dinner.
After his mother calls and after his mother moves to bathe the day's sores.
In bed my son recounts to me his good deeds and other's misgivings.
And I think of young women I should have ******.
I listen and ignore his requests for good advice.

Do my words contain a sedative-like effect?
Or they are amphetamines?
Neither, but poison?

"Only God Can Judge Me"

I tell the man with needle in hand these words I want as tattoos.

              Tomorrow is Tuesday.

I pick at the scars in my heart.

Again.

I feel the twitch in your fragile hands.

You just need to think this through.

Throwing down your veins.

They're empty, useless & you're hurt.

The princes eyes lift from their collected purse. 

We in the crowd feel our knot loosen and our shame absolved. 

Into the heart's of our innocents may they wander. 

We who bring disease and echoes misguided.  

They will take them. These daughters of our neighbors. 

Above the sentinels to watch as we praise and thank. 

The smile is carved again onto our faces. 

Our backs are exposed. 

Our spines displayed for his pleasure. 

We begin our rest against this scorched earth. 

Our blood brings hope to a future. 

A song for this prince. 

A legend to fulfill. 

A beauty to write of. 

Remove your cloak, aim a dagger into the nestle of hy heart. 

Push with grey strength and be merry. 

For their eyes see no gold. 

His eyes see us.

We bear her weight now. 
Though she is come to a place of love and true peace. 

And for love we bury. 
We burn and place weight upon all's heart. 

In infancy, the heat is felt. 
And a cold stare given unto a star above. 

A star unknown. 
To the pulp it's place is glowing. 

We pray and ask for love to return. 
We fight the war. 

And we rest. 
At night we weep and sharpen steel. 

To rise in dawn. 
In new shades, with new holds. 

From home we march into cities. 
Those to be unknown and forgotten. 

We leave the children's laughter. 
Place blood in hands and spill dirt on bone. 

To those with graves, we dig.  
We curse and find the roots. 

We struggle to breathe. 
The Earth becomes heavy, growing more with our breath. 

She was to be loved. 
And she was to live. 

For the lie, we suffer. 
Having never known her voice. 

Having never seen her gaze, we dream. 
And we see her with us. 

Holding us. 
Loving us all. 

We become selfish. 
And we stray from her. 

With image in hand we plot. 
And we wonder when our time to love will pass. 

It does not. 

So we fight her war. 

Hers of so long ago. 

Of a heartache so royal. 

And of a heartache so tainted. 

We place our bones in the Earth. 

We pay penance for our poverty. 

In our lacking we become numb. 

And there is none so lovely. 

There is none so pure. 

As we have read. 

As we have painted.  

We love her and died with her. 

Before birth. 

We curse the king which sold our maiden. 

We curse those which began our war. 

We pray for peace. 

For her and for you. 

We loved you.

Quarter and the neighborhood.

The kidnapping yields a good fit into our customers.

But that is nonsense.

Theories performed by my name.

Flames encased in tea.
Nothing more short,
looking myself so many ways ago.

Close ago and now it suffers.
Could it be Boise and you are sewn together, searching?
No flood, no snake-like coo.

Potent ticking, the largest letter in your names.

when I was a boy
I knew I
liked you best

but time undoes things
& rots
the very best


if I were a boy
I'd like
to

Think
about
what's next

I'd use my
sharpest blade
& groom you in your nest

but I'm just a girl
who's failed

o'er & o'er..


passed  your tests

and you're just a boy
pawing at my chest

my chest
under cover,

it,

sweet

or swell

enter

A phone call to inform me of grave robberies. 

Just the removal of this leg.  One leg to find balance. 

The sea tells me I am just searching. 

In the same sea I accept your disappearance. 

Morning breathes. 

Your voice on my door step. 


The morning holds a breath.
 
And you speak. 

The words begin. 


Stars fall, breaking the cloud of thirty cigarettes. 

Unnoticed, they rest aroun us,
As anxious snowflakes on some Winter night.

I cry

I cry without stopping





infidelity known.

she speaks.


a swarm is simply a swarm


I nod
blood spills from my ear.


a lance.

a knife to a fight.

short of a trophy
I prove myself.


star of track of field

six in the morning child

again


alas they say memories swing round


bad off

NATO orders my artillery to leave


die
(all of his connections)

die
(all of his corrections!)


its fingers
its denim

sweet sickly


the need to taint
its need to taint


of rose

of lace




and the nauseous chariot


I hear a man tell me to lower my pants


five fifty child molester





rumors of a wasp's nest.





Climb dig and burrow.

Four people become one warhead.


a family forgets it is first

a weld forgets it bonds



still a spider.

suspend my fangs



a jar



Orlando



Missouri



states away a kiss mimics a drone.


She
darker no.
now darker yes.


with shameful splashes we recover.
Gather and mourn in a corner.

a drink? a meal?

Yes, his favorite.

Her favorite.

Swallow.

First chew. Through salt and oil.
Find there the meat.


Excrement rots?
Fertilizes?


Or does it sink?



there

now our tears join.


With sodium we are one.

I'm drinking your blood
and you are doing many thing to drink mine


Chaos on this doorstep.




With you tonight.




remembering twenty five years ago


a signature is needed

a window to nail close.
a match to ignite
and a legacy to squabble over


life shines
i give birth
his mother
and i


and I'm praying he sees the same flake fall twice for the first time

and I'm praying he enjoys courdory

and I'm praying he has my mother's green eyes

and I'm praying he has my will

and I'm praying he knows my grandparents loved

and I'm praying he has my father's eye for beauty

and I'm praying he never knows where I came from

and I'm praying I haven't witnessed too many falling stars

and I'm praying I've not broken a heart


and I'm praying


i know it's wishful thinking


see thirteen species go extinct
see my mother cry
gnaw on iron bars
give more than have
gain a scar
smother an infant
bury a corpse
live their life
stroke hair


enjoy peeled grapes and tomatosoup with no vomiting


destroy a legacy


I reach into a wet trashbag
I feel hair and bone


I clean up and I grow up



myself molested
myself molded



a ******



two

three

and now it was eleven

twenty two?



then I wake up
and I forget



(hoping this would always **** me)


and I want to know why

And then told this is why life consists of. 

The beauty is there and also here,
pouring to the ground in a fit of grace. 

Then exists an image to focus,
strangle and bury. 

Wind and leather under salt licked wood. 

The shivers and the ringlets, coarse
reciting numbers. 

A trident to inspect nerve damage. 

Twenty second synapse misplaced, 
the fire dies and a dark room
overflows, a place becomes home
and the lights begin to pale. 

In all these things there exists
a thorn, found ******
torn from its warm host. 

A level of love severed.

It is so lonely here.

Twenty seven megahertz. Imagining myself in the restroom choking on a crushed throat. This fact is separated by a lack of sleep and much consumption of eleven dollar nostalgia.
A forced talisman of luck and truth. Like words etched onto monumental slabs of cheap granite. Floating in me, two forces join and near a ******. Above my clavicle, closest to the tainted essence nesting in between white skull and black heart. The forces fall like dead and wingless rocks from Heaven.
I try to remove my phantom from you. I try to put myself in your new shoes.
The old ones discarded with the techniques of innocence and lessons of a true first love.
You glow now. From every glossy cover I see you are strong and your wounds smoothed.
The trenches filled and paved. Lonely cathedrals blossom from your naked body. We all wait quietly to worship and sacrifice. Our scratchings wait and you open your mouth.
You open your legs and we baptise our sins in the crashing. We are all reborn of you, inside you.
Away and always this Hell turns back.

Somewhere far away, MI.

The third hurricane. And the few parts that skip, pierced and questioning. Two kinds answer with the days of telephoto webs, before there was much more to be said.

Diamonds spill over floors, on fingers then become squares from the tub's refuge. Fitting places for best friends.

Seas of sweat sway and break near the stucco. Final snowslide in ecstasy just before the window. Seasons of emotion and music hold no breaths.
The snow searches. Wondering influx.

"Just beyond the lungs, the soul waits."

And I am all but reading. 

Repairing your flesh beneath a veil. 

Children. 

And underneath the exhaust flows. 

Over the river, into the classrooms. 

Never weapons. 

One massacre. 

Something with cancer. 

Important now, the list. 

Those sweet and some salty. 

Never soiled and never bruised. 

No existence. 

Connection slowed. 

To a place of past happiness. 

A place we know to bring cancer. 

And weapons. 

A place to exhaust all your reserves. 


Do not continue. 

Do not begin to go back.

There rings a woman in bronze. 
Form frozen in hesitant beauty. 
For all to taint. 

She holds herself. 
Ruins drift closer. 

Behind her a grassy road. 
Lush for tortured soles. 

Full of disuse. 

Me here on American asphalt. 
Sparkling. 
Dazzling visitors. 

Stay for our comfort. 

Me here. 

With seasoned whispers. 

Time creeps and rushes past. 


She watches. 
I wait. 

Collect tin cups. 
Stain my fingers with faded ink.

A memory served correctly

Not buying objects but with the effort to seem so.
You fall in love
And the force

So good

Taking

   O'

  My
Only heart

Prepare now for yourself

With all the locks secured.
Having noticed my security.
Voices whisper.
Life completes.
Words tumble.
Passion from the ceiling.
Cursed epiphanies.
Little rooms left for my own discoveries. life is disrupted.
New medicine for use in moderation.
Guitar, fragile in perfection.
What is to keep?

A sunset fades & a new line is born.

This is what we truly want.
This is choice.
Consequence sings as I sleep.
My mask becomes me.
We wake.

But is there something else?

Complete with fullness.
The moments of before. Losing my mind for the sake of finding you.
Two songs play in the kitchen.
My choice remains unsung.
Soldiers rushing.

Civilians waking peaceful towards the light.
A silk blouse for funerals.
Falling far into the grave.


With a gift I move forward & destroy myself.

The boxes of bread seem smaller. There are sixteen of us under the dustmoth's slight. 

He's from a state far away, but will not tell why. 

In the window held together with thin aluminum panels. 

There are ten half moons tonight,
held in phase with infinite hesitation. 

The moons keep my heart from speaking. 

The brain above separates. 
Falls to bed, pilless but none sadder. 

Seven thorns on top of my palm. Their pain travels to a fractured elbow. 

And the marble is now clean. 
And it is sad to wonder.