a faded moon in the sky
the meteor showers cry
alone in the dark cold night
an emblem fire so cold yet bright
a bright star alone
forgotten and forgone
still, yet wavering
undeciding and cowering
a dreadful heartache felt to the bottom
everyone expects her to be strong
but she is not strong
like every, she falls
in the dark corner of the sky
there she lay,
the moon goddess in slumber
pretty as an ember
no one understands
yet she craves warmth
in the deepest depths of the earth
she wanders
longing for the same touch
longing for another phase of the moon
her cries fills the ocean
whails of agony creates storm
her tears twinkle amongst the horizon
with this she realizes
those who are near her are close yet so far
so close but yet so different
with every difference hurts
with every insult hurts
every put downs hurt
she laments in her own sorrows for no one understands
for she herself doesnt understand
what is the world when no one cares for her
she has no porpuse
no will
what are the richest and all the pearls in the sea when there are no one to share it with
she can only express her sorrows to those she feels safe to, yet those she feels safe towards doesnt understand
she longs her family but they deny her the warmth and love
like the sun they crave adventure and fun
like the wildfire they cut down woods and trees she planted
the sun mocks her gardens yet nourishes her flowers
with every delight comes a price
with every laughter comes cries
she fills herself with these emotions just to be taken away
with no foundation she struggles to find ground
she longs for bueaty and peace
they long for destruction and power
she longs for things to go smoothly like the river
they long for things to burn out in smoke
just like that, she burned in fire
she lacks warmth
she lacks vitality and soul
yet she needs these things but it burns her
the close she gets to the sun the more burnt she gets
she pretends not to care
she feels great pressure from a dam that cannot let go
she feels it from her mother whos holding by a knife
she finds her way,
but whichever way she turns she doesn't belong
she only truly feels safe by herself
she cannot fathom the day that she will no longer need or want her family
her family is all she has
she loves them
yet her family is bringing her down
she feels trapped and confused
with nowhere to go
the moon goddess cries in the dark
her whails echoes throughout the night
waking the wolf and the owls
all howling and hooting
she cries for help but no one comes

as i drown in confusion... in the feeling of an oh so still illusion ending its delusion... i feel myself going further and further, everything becomes distent... and all the people, now they all seem so little, except one getting closer... who is he? who is he?! is he unknown to me, or is it me, or both... who am i? am i hard or soft? am i big or small? whats my porpuse, reason, goal... who am i at all?
and all the masks... all this masquerade... they all fade... and finally i can see my face... no masks, costumes, stakes... no more angst... i look he... i look me... i look i in the eyes... and finally i realize, i dont exist, always wearing masks... a simple mask i became... i do not have feelings, emotions, goals, aim... because i let life become no more than a game... a simple custom game i myself became... and me... the mask claimed.

I saw road **** tonight.

I was walking
on the side walk
towards home
with a buddy of mine
and he pointed it out
"Look at that
poor thing,
what is it?"

I walked
into the middle of the road
just to inspect it further.
a coat of brown spikes,
white fur, and —
bright red guts.
Fresh.

It was a hedgehog
on the spotlight
given by street lamps.
Judging by the size of the coat
it was big and fat
it reminded me
of the one I have at home.

It also made me think
of Jeffery Dahmer
what he did with road ****
and where that lead.
I'm not saying that I feel that way
but the guts were shiny
under the Moonlight
I thought that they
had this certain kind of beauty.
A dead rat
and life goes on
like nothing ever mattered.

My friend was upset
about it.
"The **** who did this
probably did it on porpuse!"

I wasn't. I was raised in a farm
I've seen worse.
"Dude,
he probably
didn't even see it
coming."

Neither of them did.

If you don't get my point,
Picture this:
One day you're walking home
with groceries
you're not paying atention
you cross the road
and there it comes
lights flashing
coming your way
no time to react —
THUMP.

You're on the floor
bleeding out.

Jesus hugged you
with that license plate
and you didn't realize it.

Anyways,
The car backs up,
turns right,
it rushes out of there.
Hit and run.
Behind the wheel?
A ******* hedgehog.

That's the beauty of it.

Life just happens
it owes you nothing
yet you think that
it owes you—
your life.