Enter now the shadows that I've seen lurk from within the sinister dark
Where in silence I stab myself with bits and pieces of my jagged broken heart
Some remark In that regard when these memories begin to bombard every Hallmark becoming a graveyard Guilty I am just as I have been charged. Sharp tongue and a soul that's already charred so many wounds that have scarred sullied a good name completely marred. Glass broken rains down like every other shard. Of course this terrible news is hard to disregard. It's hell out here on the boulevard. A real lionheart that had to disembark from the trailer park. another question mark to outsmart,

The moral of the story isn't quite up to code
you see In was taught from a very young age to lock and load. Into the very pits of hell I have rode
Oh the stories I have told, the treasures that I hold
Could I ever dare to be a character that is so bold
If no questions are asked no lies will be sold. In overload from secrets innermost overdosed on  every uncontrolled episode now somehow juxtapose.

Perfection it cannot be rushed. Shh listen not to the voices of the hushed. Though I'm an addict I am finding it hard to adjust. Underneath  the weight of this pending doom I am being crushed. No wonder I can't go a day without getting buzzed. My good intentions smudged. It ***** when without merit your judged. feelings quite stuffed and deep everything has been shoved. Crippled and just as corrupt ****** if I do And If I don't I am ******.  For those memories I have clutched I have been fortunate enough to have been truly touched. Yet still it is not just for to look down in disgust far be it for me to erupt burning everything down like ashes to dust, with death I have brushed left is there not one I can trust flames burning inside hot enough I might spontaneously  combust. The Villians now  have thoroughly been cussed the criminals have been all but cuffed and I am back to a fool self drugged. Shunned an Idiot snubbed From my past the mistakes I have scrubbed and scrubbed. Thousands unplugged, somewhat abrupt, out in the open stuck Like a sitting duck. spitting out these huge chunks of broken luck, while I reek havoc and run amuck. Standing out in the thunderstorm preparing to be thunderstruck

Callused hands and tales of such woebegone
all animated like a cartoon that's just been drawn  The suffering the sweet suffering I seem to prolong headstrong demon's spawn so far left I can't get right I guess that keeps me in the wrong forcing myself to fit in the places that I know I don't belong. I am trying to keep moving on, trying to stay forever strong but at this impasse I've stood way too long. From dusk to dawn brains over brawn my intelligence is no supernatural phenomenon ******* did anyone else see that leprechaun Always greener when it is someone else's lawn I am long gone An ugly duckling turned  into a lonely swan with the musings of a madman I rattle on A marathon from which power has been overdrawn **** all the ******* that is hereupon who cares about all the goings on from days of those bygone colored pink with my favorite crayon  
46:10 my favorite psalm  now c'mon stay calm an epic icon, disarm without setting off the alarm do no harm safe and warm Riders on the storm Every second another one is born

delete.
Why is this the history I am doomed to repeat?
Back in the shadow of this cloud, I retreat.
Perhaps its time to render myself obsolete.

I've fallen so far from saving grace That I don't know if I'll ever be able to save face.
Am I really just a head case a waste of space
Lost here in such a God forsaken place.
Here bodies have been known to disappear without a single trace
For this devastating impact myself, I brace
Fleeing from my demons that have recently began to give chase
until caught in their clutches, where I smoother in evil's embrace.

Wont you tell  me what you  think am I good or am I bad? I haven't decided. Out of me and my sister I am easily the nicest. What I should do next I haven't the slightest. I don't know rhe flames in my hell suddenly ignited. The voices inside my head have gone completely quiet.
I am alone in the room so in the room I am the highest. I couldn't resist. To be honest this is how In continue to exsit. It could have happened so swift. Still I ran the risk of my gears getting switched and me getting flipped on my shift. I am pretty humble and rather modest. Sometimes when I'm alone in the darkness to maintain for me is the hardest. On myself I have always been the harshest.I am still Silver but these days I am completely tarnished. This chronic  am smoking now is the strongest.I am truly astonished. HIgh as hell I am feeling quite demolished.Just being honest. I tried my very best  to do just as I had promised. NO fits have I pitched.. INamn feeling pretty **** accomplished.  I ventured out of my crypt. Armed only  with a pen and my wit. Must I remind you that simply I do not give a ****. I have no problems I admit that I am in fact lit As a matter of fact Im in orbit. In my favorite ship I took a little trip. Now here in private I sit.being quiet out of habit ******. I didn't permit anyone to hear my lighter click.Nor did anyone see the sparks I did emit. Even the skealtons in my closet are quick. Inside my head my thoughts are sick, The smoke in this room is rather thick. No one seems to really know what makes me tick. For sure I won't put up witj a bunch of *******. I'll take every hit that I can get. You can even come and visit When you are at your fullest. Trying your best to be so slick. Steadily just bumping that lip like you're desperate. Who needs a gun? At you I'll throw a bullet. To miss you I still wouldn't be equipped. I am explicit. I can't help it I spend a lot of  time getting twisted

It may seem like today we have all fallen victims to a powerful curse or perhaps something so much worse. There are a lot of people in this sick sad world that just demented as they are perverse. They wonder freely though this entire universe. This has been channel nine news  You have heard it here first. Now form our sponsors these words. Gateraide Go on Quench your thirst

As one of the most horrific and grizzly ****** scenes seen here in the last 30 years so begins to unfold The viewers are simply captivated completely infatuated. The murders they say were without a doubt pre mediated. The perpetrators we said to not even have hestattied Possible motives now are being heavily debated. For now all these theories are just speculated. It was said all of this began with already dire situations escalated. Now the school steller legacy has been descraited. Causing a wide spread panic leaving bare raw emotions running rampant unchecked and unregulated. Putting much duress in the over dressed and under educated that were said to have participated. This heinous crime seems so complex and complicated. Now matter how ******* the details the detectives concentrated they still merely looked constipated. To turn your back on the people could leave you devastated. Just another murders that needs to be investigated
The defendants were said to all their lives self medicated. An obvious fact from being seen as if they were half *** sedated or intoxicated. From going out attempting to get themselves faded. Such a vicious brutality they have demonstrated. Due to the amount of over whelming evidence against them they were implicated., incriminated.and finally incarcerated. It just goes to show you even the most enibreated shouldn't be under estimated. This has been channel Nine saying Love thy neighbor especially those you at one hated. Channel nine news  unexaggerated.
We now return you to your regular schedule programming already in progress.
As the Dope Burns
To whomever it concerns. What's alarming is the rate of return for such a substance that makes your stomach churn. This is something that you definitely seem to yern.  It's almost like us addicts never seem to learn like anyone else we roll a joint and we may even rock a bowl for sure turning up that Rick and roll.i just trying to fill this hole inside of my very soul.I grow colder and more corrupt the older I grow. So welcome all to the **** show. Where the dope burns slow. Embers all a.glow solvents colorful as a rainbow as the toxic fumes start to fill the room. I feel like I'm being crushed underneath the weight of this pending doom. I feel perhaps the end mpsy be coming soon. At least I assume that leaves me red assed like a **** baboon. Higher than a **** ballin. Animated I'm all drawn out like a **** cartoon. Silvered underneath the neon moon Eyes bigger than dinner plates at nine in the afternoon. Normal activities to resume. As once again. The flames in my hell consume Get ready for the masquerade go and put on your costume. Dance as if you're stark raving mad laughing like a loon a definite ****** toon I should have notified my next of kin that I was headed straight to the ****** bin, but once I got there those ******* wouldn't let me in. So I was then released to reek havoc and run amuck once again. I'm not you're foe but I am a fiend my friend. I went out searching for a means to an end and found nothing but whispers in the wind a big yellow submarine we could all live in. Insanity it seems to again. Coming up next is Rin Tin Tin followed by Lassie a classic Timmy in a well. He must have gotten dizzy turning in full circles on the carasoul when into the well he had fell. oh well is that  Fairy's tale that's demented not just swell A character I am in this demented as hell. Why couldn't I just be saved by the sounds of the tubular bell. Ask me no questions and no lies will I sell  a fond fare the well I bid to thee. I lam being the only person I know how to be I am just me. Form me I cannot seem. Yo save myself can you not see or maybe it's I that will save me after all I am sick of failing from dark tragic sky. where I chase smoke clouds and spirits even though I don't know why. I. The stratosphere I  continue to fly high. No tears falling from. Either eye. An epic fail to no avail I truly did try
One day I will meet up with my cousin Billy Wayne as a he patiently awaits for me on the other side Perched  on the pride which is his ride. He's my die or ride that  with the power glide we'll slide right on though to the other side. Where catastrophes and chaos seem to collide, where good and evil seek to coincidence. I traveled on without that he guide. Proving myself to be completely fried. The real me is buried down deep somewhere inside. Like the monsters inside of me I also hide..

Its halt and catch fire
get up, get tangled up in barbed wire.
Just as I was going to get ready  for the evening to retire.
Situations escalate until they are dire.  
Go ahead throw kerosene over everything and let it catch fire.
The flames growing higher
until its a bonfire  
hotter than a funeral Pryor.
The mere word's I write to me they do not inspire
but they defiantly tire.  
As high as they kites get I am so much higher.
If someone told you I was coming down they are a **** liar.

This chaos that constantly seems to ******* transpire
No wonder this self medication I tell myself I require
Sweet ******* release pretty much my only desire
The voice inside of my mind is nothing but a liar.
I
As the demons lurk in the shadows and nefarious monster conspire
I am spinning just spinning like a ******* spin dryer
I have gotten myself into such a fantastic quagmire
That if  I were to take my aim I would probably misfire
A catastrophe and calamity ******* chaotic supplier
Of time and space I am simply a waste an occupier
Questioning minds they do so often seem to inquire
About all the pain and suffering I did somehow easily acquire

Not so much weighing on my mind but all of it heavy on my heart. My words barely Audible for my throat's so parched
Yet right through the Flames of my own Hell I slowly marched
As random on lookers just quietly to themselves they remarked
Some intentionally trying to stage a great *******  upstart
As lonely on this journey I myself am about to embark
Hidden away the the blackness of this soul ******* dark
Feeling as if at the very seems I am coming completely apart.
Heading towards the brightest parts of Hell in a hand cart
A beautifully broken disaster yet still a ******* work of art
Trying ultimate my night with fingertips that just don't spark
In general really at least for the ******* most part
Not feeling in the least bit confident, or even ******* smart
My own **** Demise I am feeling as if I did somehow jump start
I hope that joint you are not planning  to just ******* bogart
Please if you loved me at all get me ****** before I depart

A journey of such drastic ******* measures
Has me digging up all my cherished treasures
As hard pressing the very pressures
Put on me by the grievous endeavors
Leaving only those I consider my aggressors
To wallow in their own **** self pleasures
I am here attempting to burn out my own receptors
Truly it is a rather one of  those remarkable kind of gestures
As to Ashes I reduce all these unnecessarily kept records
I need no scythe to frighten off all these Spectors
Shaded by all these unseen ******* reflectors
So before I end property of some ******* collector
I'll seem out my very own salvation my own protector
That is in an entirely different world another sector,
Pretending all the while to be the courts best jester
Someone who let's the sorrows ******* fester.
Yet will never admit that they are indeed the lesser
A self doubling complete second guessed
That has been smashed underneath every stressor.
Now blowing in the breeze light as a feather
I am gone not just for now but for ******* ever.

when in this lifestyle we stay long
we start to feel this is a place we can belong so we allow ourselves to carry on pretending we are being strong. It used to be we would be up all night long hitting the **** ****. waking up that way too should tell us that there is something wrong 9 times out 10 by noon I am altready gone animated like a cartoon I've been drawn. I am not satan's spawn now am I someone pawn the grass always does appear greener in someone else's lawn. After all the heartache we have undergone why in this area are we so **** headstrong. Why is it so important for us outperform, our own tales of woebegone. This hackathon. if this misery we must prolong, The dangers we forwarn it's quite possible to be left out in the shitstorm. Now it has to run its course. From it very core it rages likes war. This is where all our pain is stored. So when we twist off we will scorch. So this is a last resort. Our stolen horses turned out to be unicorns. Knock me out with the chloroform. Hold down the fort and sound the alarm. For such a show of force there will be no reward. Go 0n tell that to your noble Lord. Let him be the one you misinform. Turn our addictions into an art form.

You see they are clever keeping us willingly hooked forever. They have become our transgressor, Always looking down on us like we are lessor. In our suffering they take pleasure. I know I wish we had never embarked on this endeavor. They aren't thinking about what is going to happen to us whatsoever. Of course he voiced his steller displeasure. Beating us again just for good measure. To get out 0f here we will have to ban together. We will ***** up her ledger. Make it seem as if she had been writing seductive letters to a number of lepers. However this time it wasn't us that was under all the pressure. He dug us up and buried her just as if we were all hidden treasure. Before we are the ones they recapture Lets escape into the lands of never never. Where they won't find us, ever!

Well **** here we go again, losing ourselves rambling on in our world of pretend and make believe. Captivated though that whole story I could barely breathe. Now you must be in such state of grief that your spirit is screaming for release. addiction is a hell of a disease. It will easily bring you to your knees, tearing you down treating you however it does please. completely destroying entire lives with concerning ease. It's like it is now autumn and us addicts are blowing in the breeze, just as if we are falls falling leaves, Falling away at such great speed we should all prepare to take heed. stop feeding the need for we are killing ourselves indeed. cut me and it is still red I"ll bleed. I am still me underneath. I grew accustom to being one to retreat instead of facing any memory that was bitter-sweet So now I can not render myself obsolete not until the circle is complete. Not at all will it be discreet. our stories are not chiseled in to concrete Victorious we can still bring defeat for we do recover. We can lay these addictions down at our feet hopefully kicking them completely out reach.

Here I am tarnished, a blemished soul
searching for anything to complete me, make me whole
As usual i'm starting to lose all my self control
My only interest in anything at this point is just rocking this **** bowl.
There are demons out on patrol
More corrupt and so cold I get the older I grow
I was always meant to lead instead of follow
The truth is sometimes quite hard to swallow
The time we have on this very plane is only ours borrow.
In past regret and sorrow I refuse to sit here and wallow
I swear I will try to do and be better tomorrow

How strong do I have to be? Strong enough to get back up at least one more time.
I'm more than just a little outside my mind.
Craving exactly what I don't think I'll ever be able to find
No sense running from the past if you can't leave it behind
Moving  forward right into the unknown. wandering blind

Armed with only my wit and a fountain pen.
I battle my enemies with only my words again
These battles either way I am going to win my friend,
So I guess I'll being see you on the other side then
In all of the chaos Discord stands a force for you to reckon with
For she is larger than life a legend not a myth
while I end up polishing off the rest of this fifth
I can't help but wonder if this is it. is this as good as it gets?
I try to show that I have at least a little intelligence
Oh the ******* hell with it
What you think really is  irrelevant.
We all have relatives that's have closets full of skeletons
Isn't that the right, your excellence
There is no case there is no evidence.
It's a hell of an existence
When a handful of sensitive Benjamins insisting on innocence
fonder your heart grows in their very absence
How do people keep living on in complete ignorance.
With every experience
I pray for my own deliverance
If I had other intentions I doubt it would make a difference

He swung open the door and there I stood alone in a thick cloud of smoke'
This empty room is really a sick sad twisted Joke
Smoke that is so stale and so thick you can't help but to choke
Feeling like i am at least a little woke
as well as  somewhat exposed
now i at standing here at this crossroad
.Im hallowed, I can't help but to be a cutthroat
I've got problems by the very shitload
teetering on the brink of a psychotic episode
My mind is begining to overload
For me it is just **** late for me to go rogue
Too soon for me to attempt to go ghost.
So as there chaos begins to unfold
I'll be right here, your **** right I am throwed
This story has since been rewrote.
These demons of mine i end up intentionally trying to provoke.
Just by the spirits that have chosen to invoke
My mental illness still has yet to be diagnosed.
I am still stuck in beast mode
its possible I think I am about to overdose
Im searching for the antidote
Not exactly the message that I was wanting to promote
Things haven't quite gone as I had hoped,
No I haven't been coaxed, nor have I been coached.
I am now here forever shadowed
as I lock and I reload
I didn't make it out but almost
Like a parasite feeding on its host
Dethroned, dead I decompose
That's the way it goes I suppose.
Im constantly sitting here steadily  ******* up
I don't even care if I happen to get caught
Bring on the onslaught
As the puddle in this bowl thickens so does the **** plot
I am just what I am and what I ain't i'm not
I have put quite a bit of thought into becoming a distraught astronaut.
I  may have very well been forsaken but I"m not going to be easily forgot
Everything that's going on is really rather a lot
So let the **** bodies just sit here and rot
and we will go and smoke some ***.