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156 · Jan 2019
Time to Heal
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
You say you’ll love me always
but can that love express?
Inexplicably connected
we connect without success.

Play dates, texts and evening swims
You hurt to hear me now,
so one must find the reasons,
then things can fix somehow.

You suggest you see what’s best
by having stopped to think
of reasons why we must not try.
You sent me them in ink.

Head says I need less neediness.
Head says you need more trust.
Head says contact is much too soon.
Cold turkey is the best.

But after saying all you think
you ask twice for response.
and signify a little wink.
that takes my breath and sense.

And since you’ve left me senseless
and broken me apart
perhaps our love I can express
without my head but heart.

Now I know not of reasons-
things we can control.
I know love has its seasons.
I know I feel your soul.

I know naught that can be taught.
I know just what I feel.
I know there are no rules for us.
I beg borrow and steal.

And what is real and what is dream?
And how can one decide?
And when to stop and when to start?
And when to end the ride?

There are no answers in the mind
They harbor in the soul
How do I feel about time to heal?
The word “heal” comes from “whole”.

The soul knows naught of “either or”
It sings the song “both and”
It knows naught of right or wrong
It forfeits for The Friend

I see two trees twined in the wood
have rubbed raw one another.
I see them healing one on one
each giving each their cover

So if I ignore what you implore-
to give you time to heal
and instead of time I give this rhyme
that rings like your bell’s peal.

That fills the room like our first Ohhm
that stabs you to your core.
Let us forgive and let love live,
and row toward the roar.
153 · May 2021
Exfoliation
Cliff Perkins May 2021
Looking at the Sugarberry tree
Its rough but paper thin bark
Splitting and peeling

Growth is such a painful thing
Is it the same with us?

In truth there is both you and me
Circling each other like a shark
Writhing and reeling

In the end everyone must hang
Please don’t make a fuss
151 · Feb 2023
Black Dog
Cliff Perkins Feb 2023
The Black Dog leads us on, we blindly follow
Over unknown hill or cliff or hollow
His eyes peer, leer from ‘hind his haunches
Howling at our redempt/preemptive launches

The darkness draws so nigh so down upon us
How shall we celebrate this coming onus?
This moment when our claws shall cause salvation
In ****** recompense to every nation

Since days of mighty kings and godly Horus
We’ve tried to make it right with might before us
But now the might has rightly grown to own us
Earth’s only hope is that it soon devour us.
Thinking a lot about War lately.
148 · Oct 2023
Cutting Flowers
Cliff Perkins Oct 2023
First Frost
Is on his way tonight
Winter wind’s grim reaper

Some can be saved
By being brought inside, some not
Triage in our tiny home

Geraniums overwinter, but not Impatiens
Their watery corpses will haunt us all for weeks
Cut them off

I go to do this deed
Cheating frost his victims
Fighting fire with fire, cold with cold, death with death

Some pots are not as pretty
Gotten gangly
Or turned pale and yellow

These are easy to dispatch
Or relatively so
As clippers cut soft tissues

I save the best for last
Thinking twice
Perhaps keep them a while?

But in the end
Decisions must be made
Sharpening the blade

One princess of a ***
Shining in her prime
Attracting butterflies of lime

She is the last
Am I up to this task?
I do not know

I hold the limb, but hesitate
Its not too late
To change my mind

Killing beauty
I fear we both shall bleed
Though only one be dead

Searching for some solace
I pray a prayer
Forgiveness sought from her
148 · Aug 2022
Fall’s First Color
Cliff Perkins Aug 2022
Atop the breezy bluff
O’erlooking all the lake
A flash of red, amidst the sea of green
Summer’s seen enough
Autumn stirs to wake
At Sol’s command, the black gum starts to turn

The world has changed today
Unnoticed by the throng
But some have stood still long enough to feel
The cry calls of the jay
The shadows getting long
The coming of these first sure signs of fall

These some have watched the season
Come and go and come
They know this show shall go and come again
They know this change is reason
That’s caused their mind to roam
Back to all that pleasure or that pain

Their bodies still remember
Those times both cruel and kind
That happened this exact same time of year
One wonders what past ember
Fanned by this fall wind
Blazed back to life to cause their smile or tear
147 · Mar 2023
Anne Frank
Cliff Perkins Mar 2023
What was the point of her belief
that everyone was good?
Evil killed her anyway.
Her faith drowned in her blood.

The benefit that she received
While living in that loft
Her days not filled with hatred hard
But only love so soft

That one small grace was given her-
To know that every man
Despite his most appalling sins
Has done the best he can.
146 · Jun 2022
Akimbo
Cliff Perkins Jun 2022
The Sourwoods sway akimbo
Beneath the windswept Pines
Oh, but to be a scampering squirrel
Joining their dance divine!
145 · Jan 2019
Homebody
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
I sit here on the couch
And listen to her voice as she converses through the ether
I do not know what is discussed
From my one side of the conversation
But I know her voice is beautiful and caring and kind

I am here at her house
Just being domestic
Each of us doing our own thing
Yet knowing the other is there if needed

The room is quiet now
The fan revolves
The refrigerator hums
The light from the window is dim

There is a peace in knowing
That I am allowed to be here
Even though there is no reason
No purpose to my presence
Except my presence

Our love is coalescing
Becoming firm and stable
Less wobbles now
Less danger of a fall

But it will always bear watching
Will always need attendance
So I shall try to do that
Be the tender of the tender

Where is all this going?
When will all this end?
I have no way of knowing
But I have found the Friend
144 · Aug 2022
Turtles all the way down
Cliff Perkins Aug 2022
So many levels
Of vision, of existence
Each a door into its own universe

What can you see?
It depends on how you look
A telescope, a microscope?

Or how you travel
A plane, a train, a car, a bike, afoot
Each different speed reveals a different world

Summer’s heat slows a walk
Along familiar paths
Allowing eyes to see
The things they missed before
143 · Sep 2020
Eastern Shore
Cliff Perkins Sep 2020
Eastern Shore

How many poems have I penned
Of this same sunset scene?
What drives my muse to sacrifice
At this altar again?

Lies there some ancient meaning here
That my poor words forsake?
Why do I gasp in awe-filled gaze
Across the mirrored lake?

The last of light flees up the trees
From water into green
And grabs my soul all unawares
And speaks of in between.

Of how there is no certainty,
No solid place to stand,
The only constant, constant change-
How all is shifting sand.

I beg the dying light not leave
I beg the sun stand still
I beg Time’s sands not sift through sieve
I beg Kali not ****

All those prayers go unfulfilled
The night swallows the day
The golden light that each leaf thrilled
Must Hades’ curse obey

Yet as I rage for light I lack
For all the beauty gone
I see a palette of pure black
To paint Orion on

What peace from knowing nothing’s staid
What consecrated bliss!
False idol Permanence betrayed
By sun’s last Judas kiss.
Many years ago in my bookstore meanderings, I ran across a book by Alan Watts titled The Wisdom of Insecurity.  It blew me away with its explanation of how the thing we worship (permanence) is a false god and how the thing we fear (impermanence) is the necessary ingredient of all true peace and happiness.  Like all spiritual truths, this insight is often lost in the distractions of everyday existence and must be regained through spiritual practice.  I'm not very disciplined so I don't do well with practice, but I do enjoy wild nature.  Things like forest bathing or sitting alone by a secluded lake hidden in a wild old forest.  Sometimes the beauty of nature will shock you into this truth about impermanence without the effort of practice. That's what happened here.
143 · Feb 2022
Eastern Shore II
Cliff Perkins Feb 2022
The shadows creep
Out of the deep
Crawling up the shore

Golden sun
Will soon begone
Light will last no more

Frigid breeze
Slides through the trees
Stealing warmth from earth

Dark has come
Into my home
Freezing heart and hearth

Age spotted hands
Type of these lands
That none shall ever read

Yet birds still call
And sparrows fall
Like hairs upon my head
143 · Mar 2024
Donkeys Cross the Dam
Cliff Perkins Mar 2024
Donkeys cross the dam
In somewhat single file
Meandering like a stream
Yet in one known direction

Their purpose made more serious
By their nonchalance
A dignity of being
Of knowing who they are

Backs toward the setting sun
Grazing green grass
Headed home, no hurry here
Though night is falling fast
142 · Jul 2022
Wounded Things
Cliff Perkins Jul 2022
I am drawn to wounded things
The tattered butterfly
The lonesome dove, the long-lost love
The way we live and die

The terrapin with broken shell
The tree by tree rubbed raw
The broken leaf, the mother’s grief
The mouse in my cat’s maw

Why focus I on things that sigh?
Why not sing happy songs?
To live and die, it helps to cry
The wounds help right the wrongs
141 · Jul 2020
Doodling
Cliff Perkins Jul 2020
“But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground,
as though he heard them not.”
John 8:6

What ran through his mind?
God’s plan?
Man’s inhumanity to man?
Was her husband kind?

Why with his finger?
Dust into dust?
For better or for worse?
God given lust-
A blessing and a curse

What did he write?
Some obtuse design?
A stick figure of His own end?
A solitary hangman’s game?

Was it Words?
To Him to her compare?
******* versus *****?
Which was less, which more?

How to stop this madness-
Stones cast on her head?
Turn them into bread?
**** me in her stead?

No matter what he chose
He was sure to lose
This is the story of the woman caught in the act of adultery by her husband, and the crowd who was about to stone her to death as was required by some of the scriptures. The crowd asked Jesus what he thought they should do with the woman. He eventually answered saying:  "let he who is without sin cast the first stone". I was struck by one small part of the story- the fact that, before he answered, Jesus knelt down and wrote in the dust. What was that all about?
140 · Aug 2020
Mine and Yours
Cliff Perkins Aug 2020
Mine-
A hole in the dirt
Begging one dig deeper
No matter what the cost

Yours-
Such a joyous word
Laughing as it gives away
What can n’er be lost
140 · Apr 2020
Dusk
Cliff Perkins Apr 2020
Across the lake
The sun moves
Imperceptibly
Unless you fail to notice

Dare not be distracted!
Should you be lost in reverie
For only moment
All will change on your return

Night comes
Chasing day
Like hounds after the hart
Nipping at the heels

Rushing ‘cross the water
A shadowy Tsumani
Drowning grass and trees
On the other side
138 · Sep 2018
The Others
Cliff Perkins Sep 2018
They are here
They are always here
I walk among them
So often unaware

Arising full of pain and stiffness
Is it cancer?
Struggling into my clothes with grunts and groans
Making coffee, spilling grounds everywhere
Grabbing my old stick
I stumble through the woods
Looking, listening.

We all affect each other
In intended and unintended ways.
My old hiking stick
Destroys the wondrous web
She spent all night making.

What power I have over her.
What power some have over me.
Even the smallest ones
In my gut or veins
Deciding only
If I live or die.

I am the destroyer.
I am the destroyed.
Flood and fire
Tooth and claw and fang

What does it mean?
What does it all mean?
Anything? Nothing? Everything?
Together we all rush along
A herd of cows on stampede
Pushing, pulling one another
No one knowing where or why

But the whole has its own direction.
138 · Sep 2021
Raccoon
Cliff Perkins Sep 2021
Cosmo killed a raccoon last night.
Ellen found it by the door.
She heard the ruckus in the middle of the night.
I did not, being a sound sleeper

It’s my job to dispose of his kills.
I grab the shovel to scoop him up
Before the warm September sun
Makes him stink.

I try sliding the shovel under his soft fluffy fur
He falls off as I lift him up
A clumsy undertaker.
I should apologize

Finally, I get him balanced on the blade
Start the long walk up the driveway
Then off into the woods far enough  
To hide his stink and flies

The path through the trees
Is blocked by spiderwebs.
I whisper “I’m sorry”
As I break each strand.

In the cool morning
I throw him rudely across the big ditch  
That might keep the dogs
From dragging him home again.

Standing beside his body
I feel the need for words
Some remembrance
He was once here

I hear the cicadas,
Fewer and slower now
September having slowed their song
They’re singing their own dirge
138 · Jan 2019
Friends and Lovers
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
Friends and lovers all in one
Could such a thing be real?
Our rabbits cried then dared and tried
And ripped apart the veil

We lay before a holy fire
One “Om” our souls revealed
But when we stopped because of fear
Perhaps our fate was sealed
Like peter on the water walked
just ‘til his faith was stilled

Since then we’ve hopped, started and stopped
Searching for that “Om”
Two rabbits loped, two rabbits hoped
To find their happy home

We lay in bed and smugly said
Stopping that “om” was wise
Just do the math -the solid path
Requires such compromise

Plod round the mountain step by step
Don’t leap from Cliffs of stone
A leap of faith is too much risk
Half loaf’s better than none
Friend and lover though both are good
Relent and choose just one

And so we did -we played it safe
And this is where we are
Our love is cleft and all that’s left
Is this ugly scar

A text from you hopes just for friends
After the wounds have healed
Have mercy on our suffering souls
Let the love be killed

But having tasted friend and lover
To live with less than both?
Be satisfied that Jesus lied
Seek neither truth nor troth

I’d rather choose all win or lose
Einstein would roll God’s dice
On wings set sail or if we fail
I’d rather pay that price

So I will tend that hurtful wound
No matter how it feels
I need a lover and a friend
I hope it never heals

Oh I will not be constant
The pain is hard to stay
Run hot and cold ‘til I am old
Come back then run away

But though I can’t make up my mind
And it may never cease
I know that you are truly kind
Hope’s better than release
134 · Jan 2019
Fruitfulness
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
Looking at the wild shrub
I chose not to cut down.
The one the Cherokees called
“hearts bursting with love”
Its pink fleshy pods
Open to reveal five seeds
of the most outrageous orange

The shrub has several stalks
Only one is overwhelmed
with those vibrant fruits
The stalk that is obviously dying

Sacrificing its own self
To feed the fruit more profligately
The children joyously
Consume their mother

Have you ever noticed
The fruitfulness of death
The tree or shrub
That creates wildly
In the days of its own destruction?

Birth and Death are Yin and Yang
The end of each always
The beginning of the other

People are no different
They too feel the chill
And seek to find a purpose
Before they perish

It is then
They plumb the depths of being
For perhaps the first time
In their entire lives

Mark the profundity
The leering crowd hopes to hear  
In the condemned man’s words
Right before the hangman
Springs the trap
133 · Jun 2022
Shorelines
Cliff Perkins Jun 2022
When you take to your canoe,
Avoid deep water
Instead, slide slowly long the shore
Hide beneath the hanging oak
Wait upon the show

There lie places of abundance
Transitions
Wake to sleep
Life to death
Water to earth to air
131 · Jan 2019
My People
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
I walk these woods
Wild azaleas, ladies slippers and sweet shrub
Bobcats, deer, turkey and bear
Towering pines and hardwoods
A cushion of straw and leaves
Knee-deep in some places.

I remember rabbit hunting here as a child.
Back then, there were still open spaces
Filled with broom sedge, honeysuckle and bare red clay.
Blackberry briars and pine trees no taller than my head
Red Cedars and hollies everywhere for Christmas
We always came and cut our tree here.

It seems an untouched wilderness now
But if you go slow and look closely
You can still see faint reminders of my people

Flat stones stacked three high
The pillars for a barn or house long gone
A stone chimney half fallen
Because bees have stolen the mud chinking.

The outline of the springhouse
Where they kept the milk cool
The hole where later, when they could afford the time
They dug a well by hand.


Rusty barbed wire growing out of the center of huge trees
A reminder of better times
When there was money to buy wire
And enough neighbors that the cattle no longer roamed free

A whisky still by the creek
Dug down into a hole to hide it
The still full of axe holes
Cut by the revenuers
When they finally found it

Irish whisky to grease the fiddle
At the barn dance
To make the feet fly in a merry jig
And to drown the sorrows  
There were plenty of those

The farm next door
Where the husband went out to the barn one day
And hanged himself.

Ditches deeper than a man is tall
Zigzag across the landscape like lightning strikes
Reminders of what they learned
That the rains would wash the top soil down into the creek
Leaving nothing to nourish the crops.

In the end, the government offered assistance
Men with book learning called County Agents
Men who knew how to survey elevations
And design terraces that still curve through the deep woods

It was too little too late
But farming was all they knew
So the farmers spent weeks and months and years
Digging and damming to build
Those little pyramids of salvation
To save their soils

They were poor as the dirt itself.
And now, even the dirt was gone

It was no way to live
Finally they began abandoning the farms.
Slowly at first, then an avalanche
They went to the towns and cities
Assembly line workers
Who didn't mind 12 hour days
Or amputations.

The farms stood there
Little ghost towns on every 50 acres.
Snakes and mice moved into the houses.
The buildings burned or rotted
The storehouse, the smokehouse, the barn, the chicken coop.

These are my people
I walk where they walked
I see what was lost
I cherish what remains
130 · Jan 2019
Getting over
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
I arise at first light
Sirens of sound and sense
Call me to the dock
Sleepy- eyed
I can’t resist
The love they offer daily

The slothful sun
Clears the trees across the lake
Burning off the mists
Dying cool breezes
Killing soft light
Getting over mourning

Remembering mornings gone before
Waxing and waning
Rising and setting
My hand shakes
From coffee or old age or both

Listening to the song “Suzanne“
By Leonard Cohen
I am reminded of old lovers
Each in some different way
I still love them all

Still thrill at the joys
Still hurt at the sorrows
I listen three or four times
And cry every one
I should be getting over them by now


Every person I touch
If only for one moment
Is my lover
The child I pass in the grocery store
Smiles and waves
As though he knew me intimately
Which he does

His mother smiles too
But differently
A tense, perfunctory smile
Tense like her grip
Tightening on his hand

She’s afraid because -Who knows?
I might be a pervert
Soon she will teach him
To guard his heart more closely
To get over it.
130 · Jan 2019
Lord of the Flies
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
Today I found three armadillos
The dogs had killed

They drug them home and humbly left them
In homage to the Lord of their castle

I got my shovel and carried them
Far enough away from the house
That I would not smell the stink.

I used to bury them
But the dogs thought it a game
Dug them up and returned them to me.

So I threw them in the lake for a while.
They sank like little submarines
I quit doing that when I started swimming

I walked by the carcasses yesterday
They were all covered with flies.

Today I sit on the porch
The dogs alert to some intruder.
They are very excited so I’ll check it out.

The intruder is a trio of buzzards.
The dogs are beside themselves.
They chase them off.

As I return to the house
I wonder about the complex webs of ecology.
Are the dogs in concert with the flies?
128 · Jan 2019
The Google Car
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
evening comes by the lake
reflecting the cloud and trees
my mind also a mirror of all things

i saw the google car today
i hear the crane coarse cry
once and then again
he starts this time every night

on the dock
a man made four square thing
surrounded by its opposite
the water so unshaped unformed

a fish jumps at the flies
then another and another
there are countless ripples
too far away to hear but not to see

darker now
the redbird’s song joins in
that last of the day birds to sing before the dark

swallows in the air slide and swoop and glide

the crane again
each creature an instrument
singing to the dying day

but what about the google car
it drives itself you know
i called my aged mother and explained to her as i drove past it
amazing how the world is changing

the bullfrog has joined us now
and the bat replaces the swallow
darting ever here and there
i wish him luck since his meal is devouring me

but the google car
what is it devouring?
technology devouring man and nature

i sit here in the midst of wilderness
with my laptop, wifi card and cell phone
am i connected of just swallowed?

there is no car and driver any more
the car is the driver
or is it that the driver is the car?

the crane again
in the background the traffic of the interstate
so prevalent and ubiquitous that it seems to not exist

because everywhere and nowhere are the same
there can be no thing, no thought, no word
without something outside it to define it

and what defines us
our skin?
or are we now beyond that

with the laptop etc extending my reach
i can share all this right now
with just the click of a send button

but still something is missing
i wish a bag of bones were here
so we could talk

converse in that old fashioned way
like old men on the bench
outside a country store

what would we say, that bag of bones and i?
all this and more, much more
and there would be silence without discomfort
to punctuate the meaning of the words
outside to their inside
defining them

a tree frog joins the chorus
just for once
but i know he will not be able to resist
hearing again and again
how beautiful he sounds

night creatures now
my laptop screen am unresistable attraction
to the tiny bugs
beating themselves mercilessly against it

so dark now
i cannot see the keyboard
only the screen
and woe, i never was one to type
without looking at the screen

smashed a mosquito now
feeling so powerful

a star appears
but it is only a jet
coming my way

what is it bringing
to this cyborg scene
gobbling up the gas and air
heating up the globe

the night is so alive
sound increases
inversely proportioned to the light
bullfrog again

and now the first time cricket
or is it cicada
lying in the ground for all those years
waiting to be resurrected
like the spiritus mundi
slouching toward bethlehem to be born
128 · Jan 2019
False Dichotomy
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
There is really no such thing as truth
For if there were
Then there must be lies

There is only that one thing called fear
If you doubt it
Stop and hear our cries

There is really no such thing as right
For if there was,
Then there must be wrong

There is only that one thing called power
If you doubt it
Try telling truth to strong

There is really no such thing as love
For if there were
Then there must be hate

There is only that one thing called need
If you doubt it
Convert me to your faith

There is really no such thing as life
As long as we all
Claw and strain and strive

There is only that one thing called strife
If you want to live
Quit trying to survive
126 · Jun 2022
All You Need
Cliff Perkins Jun 2022
An endless ramble
Through an empty ancient wood
With your soulmate dog
On a cool morning
The universe complete
126 · Apr 2020
Blackberry Winter
Cliff Perkins Apr 2020
A patch of ground
Pine straw strewn
Sheltered from worst wind

Lie down with dogs
Fur hot to touch
Tongues cool to face

Through heavy lids
See magic shows
The sunlight plays
125 · Jan 2019
Expectations
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
Expectations

Say you’re disappointed?
You show such shameless pride!
By whom were you anointed
To control this aweful ride?

Think you are the infinite?
That order seems quite tall.
If you are truly infinite
You’re infinitely small

Hilariously tiny speck!
Committing God’s great sin
"Ex- spect" means to look out
Yet you are looking in.

Look out at this great stage
Accept your one true role
Watch each wild scene rant and rage
Holy See the whole

‘Tis good to expect happiness
To rollick with the dance
But true meaning of "hap"-piness
Is things that come by chance

Before you search for Rapture
All around this globe
Remember the last chapter
Of the holy book of Job
Everyone on Facebook is taking trips to faraway places.  It is a symptom they are searching for something they feel is missing.  The irony is that what is missing is right outside their door.
124 · Sep 2018
Supper's Over
Cliff Perkins Sep 2018
Hershey melts my mouth
Dogs lie content
Having licked the plates

Sugar high mixes with my wine
How can I write
When I cannot think?

You wash dishes
Tidy up the room
I sit here decadent
My eyes smell your perfume

Dishwasher thrums
Glasses clink and clatter
Two feet or four
Shuffle cross the floor

Such simple sounds
Slide into our silence
We dare not speak
Dare not break the spell

We sit on sofa
One upon each end
No glance passes

How long have we been here?
No way to measure
No words to mark the time

Quiet slips and settles round
Drugs our senses
Fogs our forgetfulness

Lamp light warms this cozy spot
Warm almost as the dark
Of the kitchen you just left

My ears are drunk
From soaking up your sounds
124 · Jan 2019
Come sit with me
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
Come sit with me
Or better yet alone
Be a vessel
The universe one eye
A black hole
******* in sensation

Make no noise
Be unspeakable
With not just mouth but mind
Seek and you will find
124 · Feb 2022
The Lake Has Many Faces
Cliff Perkins Feb 2022
The Lake Has Many Faces

The lake has many faces
Reflecting all our moods
The clouds are full of places
The land is full of floods

The lake turns many colors
From blue to green to grey
The sky becomes another lake
Connected in some way

Like mirrors in a barbershop
One upon each wall
Sky and lake reciprocate
Reflecting one and all

The deadly dark, the lilting light
The sun, the moon, the stars
The need for speed, the crying creed
The beast, the best, the bars

Across the lake a light calls out
Begging me to come
I would if I but knew the way
I can’t find my way home
121 · Sep 2018
The Death of Bees
Cliff Perkins Sep 2018
Do not despair the death of bees
Our progress shall repair
Our nanotech makes robot bees
Whose hum shall fill the air

Amazing us who don God's robe
Become the higher power
And yet I muse, can cold steel probe
Fulfill the yearning flower?

Cliff Perkins
121 · Sep 2018
Wild Dog One
Cliff Perkins Sep 2018
I first saw him
Hiding in the woods edge
Looking so intently
What are his eyes saying?
Fear? Want? Desire? Need?
Yes. Yes. All of the above

He is Always on alert
Watching my every move
Hyper-vigilant
Ready to dart way at a moment’s notice

Days and weeks go by
He is friends with my dogs now
But isn’t that the way?
You can trust dogs more than people

If I ever move toward him
He pirouettes
and maintains our distance
It is a dance we all do
like many other dances

I respect his needs
I make no move towards him
No harsh words
Just sit and wait
and show myself
Give him room to be

If only I could have had the strength
To do the same with you

9/22/2012
120 · Jan 2019
Dead Dog
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
There he is
On the side of the road
Healthy looking, as though asleep
A dog you would choose at the pound.

So why this?
Dumped like some too heavy load.
Good, but for blood starting to seep
Like sacrament onto the ground.

Who will miss  
Him in the trunk secretly stowed?
Some child who starts to weep?
Til told he’s lost – and might be found.

Lying kiss
“He’s okay.” her father vowed
Is this why he’s left in a heap
No telltale grave that might be found?
120 · Jan 2019
Storm
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
Sitting on the deck
Hot humid afternoon
Gin and tonic
Melting fast

A whisper of a breeze
Begins

Approaching thunderstorms
What did my Grandma say
Too much wind to be any rain
But at least cool air

I walk down to the lake
To see the show

The deep water has gone dark
Reflecting the trees
A green that is closer to black

And clouds too
More black than grey
With El Greco tumult
Making them boil
Like Shirley Temple’s hair

Some bird
A tiny speck moving closer
To ride these wild currents
As they increase speed across the open lake
Then meet with the huge trees on the far shore  
And burst upward
Giving awesome power beneath the wings

Ecstatic over this opportunity
He whirls and twirls
Others join him
They cannot contain their joy

Then like all things
This too is gone
Normality returns

But in those dying breaths I swear an oath
I shall remember this
120 · Jun 2022
Silence
Cliff Perkins Jun 2022
There is a silence these spring nights
No human god can fill
I’ve listened faithfully at dark
To hear their lonesome trill
But now I know it’s past the time
For return of the Whip-poor-will
119 · Oct 2022
Preserving Nature
Cliff Perkins Oct 2022
The lake a tabletop of glass
The sky a brilliant blue
The newborn sun a blinding blast
Showcasing every hue

Maples leaning out from shore
Admire their colored coats
Swallows dip and dive and soar
As fog lifts from the boats

Each shifting scene begins to die
The moment it is born
Grab your paper, pen and try
Save each before its gone

But have you saved a butterfly
Pinned to paper with a thorn?

Find yourself a friendly fire
Let this poem burn
If its beauty you aspire
To the lake return
118 · Jan 2019
The Lord’s Prayer
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
The teenaged brown eyed seeker
Reads Elizabethan verse
Like an ancient incantation
To slake her ***** thirst
For her own Beloved
But the words seem more a curse

Why is it “Lord” and “Father”?
Where has Abba gone?
All that Kingdom, will and power
Turns the daily bread to stone
And the evil and the glory
Leaves her so alone

Lovers know temptation
And deliverance!
But must hold equal station
If they are to dance.

Your talk of my trespasses
And Heaven where Thou art
Your “hallows” feel like gallows
Around my trembling heart

Your words have left me broken
To shed my tears alone
For I can never love you
While you sit upon a throne
115 · Jan 2019
Kismet
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
How can it be
That you and I
So different from each other
Still find ourselves
So constantly
Brought back to one another?

Why do we try
And try again
Despite the odds against us?
Why do we fly
And fly again
Like this moment’s Icarus?

Why do we cry
and feel the pain
that square peg/round hole cause us?
Why we do try
And try again
Like today’s Prometheus?

Because, like Icarus we know
The game is worth the candle
The sun we seek may melt our wax
But we’re not too hot to handle

And like Prometheus we know
The pain is worth the pleasure
Flying higher
Finding fire
There is no greater treasure

So we have gone
Repaired our wings
And flown again much higher
So we have torn
Our hearts open
To discover true love’s fire

And each attempt
To reach ideal
The joy is always greater
I know more you
You know more me
We are each other’s satyr

“Tis destiny…
(The Gods all say)…
you felt when your eyes his met”
For you and me
this work is play
God’s will, maya, kismet.
115 · Jan 2019
Stillborn
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
Rumblings of expectation
Herald something crucial
About to burst forth from the blank page
Like Lazarus from his tomb

Words emerge like crocus tips
One here, one there
Promises of what might come
If all goes well

Stops and starts
A promising phrase
A natural rhyme
Become false prophets
Die upon the vine

The cursor
Wanders aimlessly over text
A pilgrimage for meaning
Nothing points the way

Like a vague dream
Snatches here and there
It fades into oblivion
And will not come again
114 · Sep 2018
The Suchness
Cliff Perkins Sep 2018
“Come over here” I said

She came
Laid herself upon my shoulder
And melted into me
As only she can do

For a long time
There were no words
No need for them
Just that powerful thrum
Like a lion’s purr

It held us there in silence
Like kids in awe of church

It assured my faithfulness
Without any need for promises
Or pledges or oaths

It will
As long as one of us can ask
“Come over here”
Cliff Perkins Oct 2020
You see them oft this time of year
As earth turns dark and cold
Bugs dancing a frenetic pace

What drives them crazy? Is it fear
Of dying ‘fore they’re old
Being omega of their race?

When evening comes so fast and hard
When surface becomes too still
Sky purple/pink with blood

Are they like me once playing cards
Hoping time to ****
Houseman’s cow contented with its cud?

Rhymed to death before its time
By A.E.’s most depressing verse
Assuring though we die, that we die old

Why do we insist on rhyme
That life’s a blessing, death a curse-
A lie the the poets have forever told

So little bugs, please stop and listen
No need to be like Mirthridades
All one must do is to be still and know

Be still and let your cold death christen
Peace in Heaven and in Hades
You don’t have to go on with the show
113 · May 2024
Reflections from the Lake
Cliff Perkins May 2024
Early morning brought her
Sunlight off the water
Footlights for the forest
Highlighting every leaf

Hours pass before us
Quieting birdsong chorus
Stealing dew from flowers
My mid morning Grief
112 · Jan 2019
Jacob's Ladder
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
There is a boy inside of me
A most mischievous child
Who hurts his love, but most himself
He keeps the romance wild

He dwells in a land of absolutes
“She loves me loves me not”
All or nothing, life or death
A terrible game for a tot

His highs so high, his lows so low
Ecstasy and despair
Yet he’d not trade those two extremes
Less feeling for less fear

Because less fear would also mean
Less feeling of the highs
He hates but holds the horrors
That his heart might hold your sighs

He’s unsophisticated
Unsure ***** unwashed
His love’s too simply stated  
But he loves unabashed

This bearded one who watches him
Knows compromise is real
Yet in his heart he wishes he
Could feel that trembling still

And so they go hand in hand
A most unlikely pair
Their three legged race a funny farce
Still makes you shed a tear

How can this work? How can it last?
These two extremes in one
Can child be father to the man
Man child to the son?

Keep the passions of the youth
To melt with fiery fusion?
Keep too the crone’s wisdom, truth
To know hell’s an illusion?

Who shall win this battle?
Which one shall remain?
A young child’s fire, an old man’s peace?
Must there be loss to gain?

Perhaps there is an answer
That does not end in pain
That marries well the best of both
Convergence of the twain

All this struggle that you see
That is so hard and painful
Is these two Jacobs becoming free
By wrestling each his angel
112 · Apr 2021
The Old Man
Cliff Perkins Apr 2021
The old man had been alone
For a long time now
How long? Hard to say…
Time had gotten slippery in recent years

No one else lives there
He does it all himself
Cooks, cleans, pays the bills
He had paid them hadn’t he?

He didn’t mind the solitude
It was peaceful
People were a mixed bag
More trouble than they were worth

He had his dog
That mutt that wandered up
And wouldn’t leave
Despite his protestations

Speaking of the dog
Where was he?
When had he last been seen?
Ah, that devil Time again!

Maybe he had run away
Wasted money
On that bag of food
Molding in the pantry

What’s for supper?
Check the fridge
Well, that makes supper simple
An egg or an egg!

Should I check the expiration date?
Not without my glasses
Which had disappeared
Around the same time as the dog

Fried or scrambled?
How about scrambled
Like my brain
Still got my sense of humor!

Turn on the gas
Where the hell are the matches?
That’s right
I took them to the fireplace

I left the TV on?
Yep- Now it’s on the news
Then comes Wheel of Fortune
And final Jeopardy

Whew! I’m out of breath
From that short walk
From the kitchen
To the living room

Better plop down in the recliner
Power back and rest a spell
And anyway
Today’s news seems worth watching

Jeopardy’s on now?
Did I doze off?
I must have
What’s the question?

Something about bombs
And London and World War II
Oh, I know this
It’s a German word!

What’s that smell?
It is so familiar
Tip of my tongue
But I can’t say what it is

Is it danger?
But it seems to smell so sweet
Wait- final Jeopardy is here!
I have to concentrate

World War I
A new weapon
That contains no steel
I know the answer- It’s GAS!

All my shows are over
Nothing left to do but eat and sleep
Christ! I forgot to cook my egg

Grab the matches from the fireplace
Amble back to the stove
Strike the match
111 · Sep 2018
The Border
Cliff Perkins Sep 2018
Pavement ends
You must slow down
Ahead lies a border

This side black hot asphalt
White hot daylight
But ahead, across the creek
Dirt road
Cool shade

Crossing over
The road disappears
In a tunnel of trees
Then wishing for deeper
Dives between red clay
kudzu covered banks

Birds flush wildly
As you climb the hill
111 · Jan 2019
Life and Death
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
The world attracts. The world repels.
We search for heavens. We run from hells.
Sights and sounds and tastes and smells.
You bet your life. Watch out for tells.

God knows them all so we must lose
Must die to live so death we choose
Tear down our dikes. Let in the flood
Truly alive now that we're dead.
110 · Jan 2019
Jewel Weed
Cliff Perkins Jan 2019
One morning’s walk there she was
A coral orange flower
Engaged in a staring contest with the sun
******* up the sap
Of the rushing water at her feet
Exulting with the orgiastic rapids
A shameless harlot
Flaunting her perfection

I plucked her

Held her in my hand
Walked quickly back the short way home

All was well
I was in control
Towering over her small frame
I would trim her stem
Install her on a throne of crystal
Satisfy her wants and needs
Show off my new possession

But the ***** betrayed me
She had tricks I never knew
Ways to show me
I was not the master

I looked down to see her
Dead in those few minutes
But with a smile on her face
109 · Nov 2020
About nothing
Cliff Perkins Nov 2020
The pasture steams with dusky fog
The poet dreams of his dead dog
The fall of day the rise of night
The people pray that wrong be right

Tiptoe cross the dampened leaves
Listen for nocturnal life
Soak it up and soak it in
Silence is the only sin

Hear the drip and hear the drop
Frost has come and now the rot
Kingfisher sings crazy song
The people pray that right be wrong

Looking over lily pads
Green floats over slate grey sky
Dragon climbs out the lake
Now is time to do or die
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