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That was my deepest secret.
Now everyone knows.
I trusted you.
So *******..
Mahalea Isis May 2014
I want you to be comfortable with me
To feel free in my presence
To spit what comes to mind
And not think about the sentence
And just tell me how you feel
Cause you're not made of steel
And if you were hurt before
I can help you heal

But you're not listening to me
You're barely hearing what I'm saying
Cause you're being shy and timid
And I'm the one who's paying
For whatever you don't tell me
Cause I know it had to hurt you
But you play the strong guy and I admire your virtue

I wanna hear whats in you're mind
And taste the lips of your soul
Touch the hands of your past
And smell success in ya future goals
I need to see you show me that maybe I am trusted
Cause if you don't trust me it's fine
Maybe you ain't love and just lusted

But tell me
Tell me how your emotions are acting
Cause I see through ya smile
Inside I know you're cracking
Tell me
You not letting me walk with you through the hands of time
And sharing with me the evilness that's lurking in ya mind

I wanna be able to look at you and be on the same level
Cause if we're both going to hell, we're both meeting the same devil
I ain't here to judge you
And I won't hate you for before
I understand you might be hurting
Cause I have my own sores

So I can be your friend
I can be your help
I can be support
With everything you've dealt
I can be a savior
I can be a shrink
I can be ya motivation
If you want to sink

I can be ya trust
But do you even know what trust is?
Cause I'm trying to show you how
I've learned what true love is
Therefore
Tell me about the love
Tell me about the hate
Cause you accepting yourself
That's what makes a person great.
Wrote this also while with my ex. He wasn't very good at communicating and had trust issues and all I wanted him to do was open up to me.
T Mar 2014
Push another button
I dare you
I'll be gone before you can mock me
for leaving.
But I'll probably stay
long enough to make it harder to leave,
And still walk away,
Forgetting to breathe.
But I remember to keep
An easy stride
so easy your pride
might not survive.

I doubt you and I
don't trust you and I
don't think you are real.
You are crazier than me:
You soak in my zeal
Run your thumb along my greatest appeal
explore the cloaked
cliffs and  plateaus, and yet
feel no love towards me.

I am too weak
To stand tall and reek
of eagerness to speak
with no constraints.
I bare my greatest pains        
to enslaved brains
that manipulate to gain
something that flows freely
from me.

At the throw of a stone,
I'll walk alone.
I'll fall and crawl and bawl alone
But I refuse to throw another bone
your way.
I might confuse again your joyfulness
as mine
and accidentally stay.

Push another button
I dare you
But I know you won't
make it so simple.
You'll plead when I run but
Still bleed as I burn
everything on my shelf
to sterilize the needle
needed to sew your brittle ego.
I weave a steady thread
of lies and secrets and hope and dread
over and under.
You won't stop bleeding
As if to say " See? You can't help me, either!".

At least I tried.
You've clutched your lies and secrets
hope and dread.
Good for you, you have held onto
your head.
Mine flips 5 times a day. ​

— The End —