Every bite was venom
on my flesh,
                   corrosive,
making me weak to you.
Then you kissed
                          my lips,
the remedy.

Crying Night

You said mean
nasty
horrible
teasing
things

you didn’t think
about what you said
to me

I turned my back
and we sat in silence.
The glow of our phones lighting up our faces
mine, sad
yours, oblivious

mine, a way out of our plans tomorrow
yours, Facebook scrolling

then,
the last straw
the tip of the iceberg
it wasn’t the things he said that night
it was everything
it was me feeling like I wasn’t good enough
our hearts filled not equally

mine, full, overflowing, even
yours, unsure,
you turned to me and tried to make me giggle
react
laugh
at a post
I shoved you
and the flood gates opened
first quietly
then raging
heavy, breathe taking sobs
crying crying

then you realized
this wasn’t a joke
you held me tight
and I told you why
All of it, and you laid and listened
silence
shhhhhh you said.
shhhhhh you’re okay.
shhhh

No,
No I’m not
this isn’t okay.


why am I not enough
the way I feel is too much
I shouldn’t have to hold it all back
You’ve turned me into an insomniac

I am
just a daisy
A tiny flower
small and obsolete
In a Field of Poppies
Who smell sweeter than I
And are larger with brighter colors
but while they might tease me for my size
It Will be Them Who are to be Plucked Away
For showing off their pretty colors in the warm sun
So I Will Get To Bloom Larger Yet Because I Am Just A Daisy

Yes, I convinced you.
I made you think you were the only I ever loved.

I'm sorry I lied to you..

But the devil was in love.

I know I told you you're worth all the time in the world
Before I told you,
that you're nothing but a filler.

I'm sorry I told you that..

Yes, I gave you presents,
With cards that said 'for us'

Now I know you're mad at me-
For giving lies, teasings, promises,
Those sweet kisses,
Just to later do away with us.

I'm sorry I broke you, dear..

But you were a fool,

*And the devil was in love.

Entities of Reality stalk haunt humankind
Teasing unmercifully promising in person
A plain brown package; The Mind’s Eye;  Pandora’s Box.
Desire disguised as a need, want, or a trophy.
Consciousness trying to escape the emptiness.
It doesn’t matter;  How can we rise above, transcend it?

It doesn’t matter;  We’re all going to the same place someday.
It doesn’t matter;  We’re all going to Heaven anyway.

The tears won’t stop?  Call them Tears of Joy;  Gratitude.
Make promises to get what you want, then wait to see.
Pretend to be Happy;  Joyful;  Hide the Pain.
Make jokes!  Laugh your way through the heartache!  Look happy!
Want it?  Take it!  Don’t look a gift-horse in the mouth!
Feeling guilty about it is unproductive.
Saving Grace;  Just Passing Thru;  Get Out of Jail Free!
It doesn’t matter;  Unconditional Forgiveness.

It doesn’t matter;  We’re all going to the same place someday.
It doesn’t matter;  We’re all going to Heaven anyway.

Despair, Distress, Hopelessness;  An Undeserved Mess!
What’s in it for You?  Recognition?  Salvation?
Generosity;  Curiosity;  Doesn’t Pay!
Return it!  Get a Refund!  Just use it, don’t buy!
Redemption; Reconciliation; Justified;
It doesn’t matter;  Give it back: Return To Sender

It doesn’t matter;  We’re all going to the same place someday.
It doesn’t matter;  We’re all going to Heaven anyway.