Growing up i looked up
to you.
You showed me what it was like to be brave.
But that one day, you chose to mess it all up.
"Come to my room, lets watch a movie."
Little did I know , I was about to be violated in my own home.
"Give me a hug"
But oh this was no hug, i wish I would'e known.
How could i have been so DUMB.
"Oh its not my fault" I say, I was too young.
The feeling of your touch down there.
"This doesn't feel right.."
" i don't care"
Nena walked in, "What the hell are yall doing??"
"He said to give him a hug" I said
That night, we got a stern talking to.
"Don't ever do that again"
Was that it? All you had to say?
I had felt like my innocence had been taken away.
Years later, there's not a day that goes by
where i don't think of that traumatizing, long-lasting memory of mine.
Maybe I'm just overreacting.
Or maybe, you should've taken action.
I'll never feel the same again.

If I looked close enough, maybe I could still catch the faint traces of lint drifting in the air from his clothes and his hair. He never vacuumed. His clothes were wrapped in scented trash bags and thrown into the backseat of someone else’s car. I sat at his desk, digits flitting across the screen and keyboard. Numbers and words turned into many little games and suddenly the table was far too small for this charade. A new day with a side of a strange cough and a glimpse of tea-stained mugs waiting quietly on the countertop. Little tired footsteps on porcelain became the melody I had grown accustomed to. I handed him his neatly packed things, and in exchange he lent me his ear. Then it turned to little blue bubbles. The strings connect us. Ma vacuumed his bed over twenty times in the morning before calling it quits. The traces of him were always overwhelming. It was always never enough.

Put on right out of the womb, a crown was placed on her head
5 diamonds are placed to represent each burden
Perfection
Therapist
Extra parent
No remembrance of her childhood
And giving when there's nothing left to give
As the years go on, she will make mistakes
Hers being the hardest to forgive
She will take the pain and burdens of the ones who brought her into this world and others without a second of hesitation and still feel as if she is not enough
She will me extraordinarily mature for her conquest asked of her
But not nearly mature enough for what she wants
She will put every person before her
But when she does something for herself, she's called selfish and lazy
She surrounds herself with books to take her to a place that expects nothing but the flip of a page
Countless times,
She will compare herself to others
She will stay up late working on that paper to get extra points just to please her parents
She will have impossible expectations to meet
Do you know who she is?
She's the eldest daughter
She won't want to have kids for the fear of putting her oldest through the same pain
But most of all, she won't get what she craves the most
Unconditional love

My sibling is always there
If I'm dealing with the worst they're right there for me
No matter what i can tell them anything
They've been asking for a while to read my poems
Probably not expecting some to be about them
My sibling
I'll always love you
I'll always be there for you when times are tough
No matter what you can tell me anything
I cant wait till I can hug you
My amazing sibling

Oh, I trust you and I love you and I need you.
I trust you more than I have ever trusted myself.
Your words sing truth against my shattered mind
as they glue pieces back together with glittering gold.
I love you in ways I may never truly understand.
Your smile brings joy to my life while your guidance
brings me back to the path of safety.
I need you to stay to help me.
Your absence felt like a dark cloud on my very existence.
I was lost without you.
Oh, I trust you and I love you and I need you.

I will be back.
She spoke.

Where have you been?
Where did you go?
I wonder.

Mommy, where is my sister?
Daddy, when is she coming back home?
I asked.

Do you know my sister?
She has a name.
I can’t remember it!

What does she look like?
The officers asked.

I’m sorry
I can’t remember
her pretty face.

But she’s kind and sweet— the
best sister on earth!

She said she went to work.
But she never comes back home.

Can I stay with you? I’m scared
you going to leave me
Like she did.

Hey! Sister!
You said you went to work!
Why did it take you so long?

Why is your pulse not beating anymore?
Why your skin looks pale?

Why are you laying there
In that scary chamber?

Leaving the house,
The memories,
Pain and happiness.
The child that used to live there.

Sometimes you leave too soon,
Sometimes you just have to.
For the good of the other people
Still locked inside.

You can't help but worry about them,
But you can't change anytning,
Now that you left.
But it is what you wanted, is it not?

You thought leaving the house would help you
But it only made it worse.
You have the life you wanted,
But at what cost?