he tells me he'll buy me a white house
with a picket fence and i laugh because
it sounds so absurd to me
why would anyone want to live in
this plastic world of despair
i mean, maybe i'm judging it too hard
but i just can't see myself
driving a mini-van with two kids
crying in the backseat complaining
and calling me "mom" as if they their
mother-tongue was not Urdu
i can't do soccer games and ballet lessons
or wait every night at 8PM to have a
family dinner
i am not anyone's wife in an apron
and there is nothing wrong with choosing
the american dream
just that its a nightmare for me
i want to finger paint the house a
million shades of rainbow
i want to tie a braid in my hair
and lie under the sun
let it kiss me until i'm brown
and free.
i want my children to blast
bollywood and dance with me
no choreography, just love
i want a husband who falls in love
with my henna covered hands and
the way i smell of the sea
i can't see myself settling to a world
where everything looks just the same
or a man who loves me in a clean,
innocent way
i know this sounds stupid and i'm not
one for crazy romance but
laughing during *** and screaming during fights
is something that feels more than alright
i like the edge and the stability in knowing
that you're not going anywhere, we're going
everywhere
i want my children to climb on their father's back
and tickle him until he cries
i want them to paint his nails
and tie his hair in little ponytails
i want them to go to the beach and not worry
about getting sand in between their toes
i want them to wake up in the morning
with their messy hair and lopsided smiles
i want them to run around the house
the way their parents did
chasing each other only to fall
into each other's arms.

I settle for less
Because less is more
Right?

Some like to live by following lists
To decide what's good enough,
Trusting the rules, the "shoulds" and ideals,
Not heart, intuition or gut.

Rulebooks and list have a time and place,
A purpose, a reason, a use,
But if unhappy we aren't let down
We just list another excuse.

"He's so nice, I must be wrong,
This job should be my dream."
Following lists can lead to smiles  
But they won't make you beam.

To find your own fulfillment,
Don't follow a recipe,
Or assume it is one size fits all,
Don't take your happiness lightly.

So yes, you can follow a guide
Of where you think you should go,
You can settle for things that make you content
Or wait for what makes you glow.

Girl, boy,full moon,
Candle light dinner,romance,
Boy says,"Pay the bill."

Getting married at 22 sound a lot like leaving the party at 9:30
Like leaving the party when there are only three people there
Like leaving the party although you have not uttered a word to another soul
Like leaving the party before anybody new arrives
Like leaving the party when only the beer has showed up and no liquor
Like leaving the party before the cool kids even show their faces
Like committing the rest of your life to vanilla ice cream and you’ve only ever tasted vanilla ice cream
Like sticking with what you know and not venturing away
Getting married at 22 sounds a lot like settling down

It's been so long since she had true affection,
she longed for it so hard,
she sought it in the arms of a friend,
who knew not what she felt,
destiny or fate,
she always thought he was a friend,
but perhaps she was wrong,
maybe she didn't see there was more there.

So she sought him and tried,
to find a love she'd once lost and forgotten,
there's bliss at the start,
but she never felt that love,
she told herself she'd still be content,
she made a promise to both him and herself,
that she'd make it work.