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Cheyenne May 13
I miss myself.
Not me now,
but before.

Before I grew older,
and learned awful things.
Before I stopped wearing sundresses,
and pigtails in my hair.

I miss the me that didn't fall apart like glass.
I miss the me that didn't have false hope
that everything would get better.
I miss the me that didn't run from her problems.

I want the me who wanted to stand on the sun,
and reach for the clouds.
I want the me who only cried over a dropped ice cream cone,
or a broken toy.
I want the me who always smiled wide enough,
that you could see her tongue through her gapped teeth.

I want to be what I was.
I want to be happy.
I want to not care what others think.
I want to not be rocks at the bottom of the lake.

I long not to be myself.
I long to be the version that people liked,
and wanted.
Lost
not in this world,
but from it.
I walk,
one foot after the other,
toward a place
I cannot name
or maybe
there is no place
at all.

Alone,
with echoes of memories
that feel like wind
soft,
and then gone.

They call to me
the good old days
but when I turn
to look,
I see only
shadows
curling in a vacuum,
and a silence
too thick to breathe.

The past is hollow.
The future,
faceless.
And the present
just a corridor
with locked doors
and no windows.

My heart still beats,
perhaps,
but it no longer sings.
It whispers
in tired thumps,
like a bird
that forgot
why it ever flew.

I am here
yet fading,
like light
dissolving
in the arms
of night
that never comes.
Sora May 10
I've been finding myself more
in the arms of uncertainty and nostalgia lately.
Its warmth cascades down my back
like hair made of gold and silk,
draping its familiarity over me
in the form of weary exhaustion.

And yet, when I get too close,
it holds me painfully tighter;
or pushes me away.
Forcing me to feel the dreary shiver
of winter all over again.

Perhaps this affinity surmised
was nothing more
than a suffocating disguise;
its hands holding mine
as if they were akin
to the bequeathed stars above.

I intend to abandon its presence,
as it did to mine;
but then I find it knocking
on my door once more.
And what else shall I do,
than let it in?
when the melancholy of winter comes around yet again, I'll be held; then forsaken once more.
Eve May 10
i am afraid to love you
because the thing i have loved the longest
lays on my pillow in tatters

a bunny, a delicate thing
handed to me in the confines of my crib
the one consistent comfort i was allowed

threads pulled loose, silken fabric stained
she has known the sewing needle
like i have known the surgery knife, afraid

i am afraid to love you
because my need reduces the loved
to something ragged
seventeen years, a hundred washes
graying fabric
half a dozen holes

i am afraid to love you
and i do not wish to see
your threads come loose
because of me
Kalliope May 9
I'm minding my business, I've got things to do,
Yet my skin is tingling, I think I feel you
Do I just ignore it? Do I give into chase?
Either way I know I'm ****** once I see your face

A heartache so close, a whisper so far
Every shadow around me turns to where you are,
I pace this map, acting like I'm fine
But your presence sends electrical shivers down my spine

I said I was done, it was my means of escape
But I've always hit the exit gates just after it's too late,
You see my scratch marks, a residual trail for you how great

I never meant to linger, never meant to be seen,
But you track me like blood, like you know where I'll be,
I loop around my guilt, vault over your grace,
Still caught in your terror radius, heart stuck in this place.
I don't last long in chase, I'm not great at evasion, if only it were just me and you it'd be a much simpler equation
Lost Dreamer May 9
As I watch the sunset,
I remember the past.
We were all together,
in the circle of best friends
laughing about all the funny moments,
even the not so funny ones.
Everything feels perfect,
cause' I know you guys will forever be by my side,
forever be my friends.
Because of you guys,
I'll forever have a smile on my face.
January May 8
I long to weave my thinking into phrases,
before the account of nostalgic moments ceases.
I wish to pen every moment, each picture that I've beheld
and I want to word all of the yearnings withheld.

what is this madness, this endless chase?
to record on a thin sheet all that took place.
Happenings and incidents I try to compile,
is this meaningful or just futile?

For sometimes it feels they'll crawl out of me
and without a glance back, run free.
and I'd not have the strength to stand,
on my wobbling legs and stretch my hand.

I don't know if this feeling's a little gray
I know somethings that have to stay
will not require me to hold tight
yet losing them builds a fright
Cadmus May 7
(A Symphony in the Air)

She passed
and the air forgot its name.
A trail of fire, wrapped in flame.
Not footsteps, no… she left a bloom,
a whispered spell, a haunting plume.

Jasmine bruised with midnight spice,
vanilla smoke and crushed device,
amber kissed by ancient lore,
and musk like sin behind a door.

It wasn’t scent, it was a hymn,
a chorus pouring from her skin.
Each note a memory, raw, refined,
a fingerprint the soul designed.

It danced on silk, it clung to bone,
it made the silence overgrown.
You smelled her once, now every room
aches for that ghost…
that perfume.

It wasn’t soft… it struck like wine,
first sweet, then heat, then serpentine.
It woke the dark, it stirred the bed,
it crowned the lips where words had fled.

Men forgot their vows that night.
Women wept with pure delight.
Time itself stood still to breathe
a scent like that will never leave.

It lives in coats, in creaking floors,
on letters slipped through velvet doors.
You lose her, yes - she slips too soon.
But you will always keep her perfume.
Perfume is more than fragrance , it’s a memory with a pulse, a phantom that lingers longer than presence itself. This poem captures how scent seduces, imprints, and outlives even the moments it was made for.
inthewater May 6
the colors were still bright
and i could hear the sun
and draw my deepest thoughts with chalk
i didn't want for anyone
hop-scotch on the driveway
chasing runaway ***** down the hill
hide-and-seek 'til we got called in for lunch
then right back outside to chase a thrill
the most i feared
in my younger years
was being kissed by bumble bees
mixing potions with the berries
we picked from climbing trees
if we missed a knot and skipped a step
a cartooned bandaid would pay our debt
or a push-pop from the freeze
we were reckless with our hearts
and our minds got off with ease
the worst of it
that we might get
was strawberries on our knees
Fuimos:
la ecuación que Einstein no resolvió,
el verso que Neruda no escribió,
el jardín que Dios olvidó podar.
Ahora solo somos
esa canción que suena a media noche
en la radio de algún auto perdido
mientras la Vía Láctea gira,
indiferente,
sobre nuestro frío."
Fuimos todo siendo nada
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