Mother do you hear my silence now?

I've been floating in an abyss terrified of who I am
Waiting for you to understand

Mother do you know why I said what I said?
You sit in a tower looking down only acts
But is it me or a reflection looking back

You claim to care about my mental state
But don't give a **** about what brought me to this fate

Mother do you hear my silence?
In the midst of his verbal violence
Can you see the pain I keep inside
Because it's all getting harder to hide

Mother when you say you care
Is it just to hide behind a prayer
Or is it more than to show God the cross that you bare

Mother do you hear my silence now?

I thought I won the crown
So, I prepared the gown
Little did I know
That's the trick of my foe

They prepared a show
In cold winter snow
I'm experienced such woe
And realized I'm just a clown

My gown has turned into ember
The things I could remember
Only rage and anger
Epitome of the raging fire on December

we grown so lets get down to it
I'm about to give you so much brain
you'd change my name in your phone to Isaac Newton
You been sending me naked photos
and seductive messages
you ready to do this
I'm trying to **** you down
baby don't be clueless

I'm trying to reveal Victoria's secret
I've dreamt of this
the first time I'd give your ***** a kiss
once you cross this doorway
your inhibitions are dismissed

I'm trying to reunite with the back of your throat like an old friend
Repeat offender, I'll touch it again and again
such a beautiful body
Creating you was God's only sin

The police will be investigating me for an pistol
cause these back shot about to sound like an parade
yes I eat from the back
but only if you behave
I'm trying to beat this ***** like I'm striking for oil
this gun is an automatic with no recoil

the trees remember me
that short walk down an urban street
to primary school
now enclosed by panicked fencing
and paranoia security systems

I watched the seasons change
growing a little
in some respect every journey

my silent witnesses look the same
monoliths marking time
with bark and moss layers
roots entrapped in black cracked tarmac
where they were meant to wander free

my conscious return is by car
they cancel the careless carbon footprint
of this time traveller

I feel connected
as though an old movie
flickers among the boughs
of my diminutive figure
ghosting along the pavement
for a moment I am with him
tears unexpectedly blurring my eyes

Girl
No, better than girl
Better than playground crushes
Summertime blushes
Fleeting rushes
And cheeks, those flushes
Not girl
But woman
Etched in notebooks
Eyes that look
Through soul
Grace visions
Pinpoint precision
Woman
In technicolor
Live
Electric, but wireless
In 4320p
High dynamic range
And legs for days
I see you
Cinematic
And wild in you ways
Like watching for the
First time a nature
Documentary
And knowing the lion is king
But the lioness, the hunter
Not cub I seek
But grown
Wonderful
Dangerous
Vivacious
Passionate

Woman
In technicolor
A world not her own
But give it time
As she toils
And breaks
And creates
And tries
And amazes
And blazes
And screams
And relaxes
And I stand in wonder
Under the weight
The awe
Of her
Woman
In technicolor
In worlds lost to the black and white
Of conformity
And distortion
The contortion of which
Make her seem small
But she not
At
All
She is technicolor
Made for IMAX screens
And this boy
Hoping to prove to be
Man’s
Dreams