Life is like a suicide hike,
Although it's a beautiful trail
It's scary to think one day we'll fall.
We fall because we walk on edges,
Some worth walking on, some not.
Ultimately, we learn from both.


Be careful who you choose to walk with,
Be careful who you choose to sit with.
Because they may just push you off
And way down you'll be falling down.
But sometimes it wasn't them who pushed you off
But it was them you thought would help you up.


And when we've hit our lowest point in life
We start looking for the root of our pain,
But it's dark and empty, it stings we feel lost.
It's no paradise down here, the pain feeds on our strength.
It's a tragic accident that breaks all of our bones.
With no paramedics or anesthesia, we've got to operate ourselves.
We don't know which injury is killing us more,
But we know a slow death is coming for us.
Our blood no more, regret is what the heart pumps now,
We scream and cry away our mistakes
But down here is a curse playing our fall in a loop,


I don't know when it stops
I'm drowning myself in my pain.
I've stained my soul with too much hate
I'm no longer the person who I used to be.
I've been down in the dark for too many days  
But when I start my hike again  
I hope to go further than yesterday.

Yea! Ok uh-huh
I know the roads hard
You lost and trying to find yourself
Wanna grab the shard
Seems like the lights so far away
Every day it's a struggle
Can't find a reason to breathe
Eyes gone and you can't see
Wanna take the pills, wanna OD
Gonna set yourself free
Let it all go
Cause your broke inside (cause you're broke inside)
Looking for a reason to stay
But everything looks gray
The stress is getting to me
and I will admit, I am not ready
Not ready to face the demons of society
That's too much anxiety
Thoughts overwhelming and I just wanna sleep
But I sit here, letting the tears flow as I weep
***** scary and I don't wanna take a peep
but to find your light in the dark you gotta dig deep
Deeper than the ocean, deeper than the sea
Deeper than anything you wanna be
(CRAZY GOOD INSTRUMENTAL SOLO)
But life can be a scary thing
SO!
Lock the doors
I'm staying inside of my room
Feeling full of gloom
and my faith is doom
My happiness is consumed
I feel the hand of despair
Man this life just isn't fair
Struggling to breathe I need more air
But I don't wanna pay the fare
To go somewhere,
where I don't need to be aware
Reach this peace I find it there
You know that magic has a cost
But for me, it's lost
So help me find the reason
'Cause right now my mind screams treason

Tonight we win
Tonight we sing
Cause you and me
We'll defeat the enemy
Hold my hand you'll see
We'll make it be alright

Tonight we win
Tonight we sing

Wake,
stretch,
give thanks,
stay blessed,

yoga is a daily meditation,
that always beats a head depression,

mix my asanas with vegetables,
but no pasta nah because I’m gluten free,
stay hydrated and celebrated because I made it,
out of the gutter and into the upper echelons of society,

now I practice Jiu-Jitsu,
with the Gracies in Beverly Hills,
now I’ve got beautiful guy friends,
and amazing lover girls,

see these hands and massage your tensions,
or they can choke you into submission,
I could plant a seed that gives birth to life,
or I could take a life away in 8 seconds,
we can give life and taketh away,
I’d say it’s all just a matter of intention,
and they say that necessity,
is the mother of all inventions,

shout out to Plato for coming up with that one,
as we mold our future like Play Doh,
see we literally made everything we have,
we are literally our own creators,

it’s incredible what we can manifest,
as cliche as that sounds,
see you are the Master of your own destiny,
you decide if you win or lose,

every morning is a new day and a new chance to choose,

don’t let Yesterday’s regrets,
hold you back from Tomorrow’s goals,
get rid of any addiction you might have,
if that addiction doesn’t serve the soul,

see maybe reincarnation is real,
or maybe it’s not,
either way you’re alive right now,
and right now this life is all you’ve got,

to live your life,
that’s why they call it living,
and give thanks before every meal,
as if every meal is Thanksgiving,

see I have a saying,
if you don’t thank God for your blessings,
then you’ll soon have no more blessings,
to thank God for,

so give thanks,
not only to God but to your friends,
and not only to your friends,
but also to your self,

stay focused,
be true,
and remember this is only advice,
ultimately it’s all up to you,

so what are you going to do,
what choices are you going to make,
are you going to be one of the Real Ones that shine,
or are you just going to be another fronting fake,

choose wisely,
and over all be good,
give thanks nightly,
remember to rest well,

get as much sleep as you need,
so you can awake refreshed,
pay attention to your dreams,
and let go of all regrets,

wake,
stretch,
give thanks,
stay blessed.

∆ LaLux ∆

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i'm painting my nails yellow from now on
i need this refreshing color in my life
i need sunlight and warmth
but in the same time it's so pathetic
like if my nail color could change anything
but still, call me stupid, but i will do this
...
/M.A./

~I'm on my way home.
Memories greet me with a firm handshake, forcing my fist closed like pride, or rather pride closed my fist cause I've learned that my self defense was a defense of self.

~I left three days ago, and no one seems to know I've gone.
Well my heart left long before I did, as my ventricles began to vet the blood around me crying in vain "it poison us".. And they did with contradictory messages  restricting my confidence to a cell while wondering why I couldn't be positive.

~Home is where the hatred is. Home is filled with pain.
My past walks with me like shadows. It haunts my every step, ingrained in my soles. The many pieces I've had to carry to be some semblance of whole. An architect of my own happiness I've finally started building myself from ground up.

~So it might not be such a bad idea if I never, never went home again

breath in,
breath in so much air that it hurts
that your lungs hurt
and now keep breathing in
stop, wait
and let it all out

this action represents life
how?

we can take, take, and take
but sooner or later
we have to let it go
there is no chose
in any directions

/M.A./

Pieces of my heart will always belong to you
Like the puzzle pieces i misplaced when i was seven
That still reside in each crevasse of my childhood home
Waiting for me to come bounding out of my bright pink room
With open hands
To retrieve them, and welcome them after all this time apart
Alike my love for you waits
In each crack and crevasse of my soul
To be noticed