tedious and monotonous
not retaining the useless information
keeping my head down
so people won't talk to me
if they do
I fear it won't be nice
students avoid me
and that's fine by me
they aren't very courteous to begin with
I finish my work in a flash
then dive into my book
teachers like me
and students come to me for help
I quite like this interaction

I have always been the gifted child
overachiever and overworking myself
desperate for approval
if I get good grades, maybe my parents will love me
get straight A's
get on the honor roll
be the top of my class
a B is the same as an F
you drilled that into me
my worth was dependent on my grades
if I wasn't the best, I was worthless
I hold these messages to this day
no matter how detrimental they are to me
now staying a the top and the best grades is a struggle
I can't be the perfect child anymore