I see in your eyes,
Two shallow pools of white with coffee mixed in,
I tremble before them,
You judge me too hard.
I hear it in your words,
The desperation reeks,
Its care you say,
I don’t feel it anyway.
I see the way you are,
Insincere and shapeshifting,
You’ll love conditionally
‘Don’t worry’ you reach your hand out
Each time we touch I die a little more
Its scary out there,
Look in the mirror to feel safe
My mind puts up a fight
So I need you all again
The pity holds me well
Well enough to try again

I love you

Crazy how you turned my world upside down.
Crazy how I can’t think straight when you’re around.
“Interesting.”
Interesting. I want to shove the word back where it came from. Take back your words take back your hate. The things I’ve seen are not click bait.
They’re real, they’re here.
And sometimes they build into a deeper fear.
Never will I ever drown in the waves of you.
I will not let this form emotional glue.
I’ll hold myself together, I won’t stage a coo.
But sometimes I wish.
That I didn’t need to.

My fear is you
It is rare
But when it is me
It is true
My fear is me
It is rare
But when it is you
It is true

Here you are.
Running and running,
you stand here at a border.
One of vessel and mind.
  
Oh, mirrored child!
How you have grown!
Still...
too tame, too wild.

A paper without a pen.
A frown devoid of rage.
Your words are vibrant.
Your value is undefined.

Static as a variable,
dynamic as an organism.
You have friendly masks,
yet volatile insides.

A friend?
A foe?
Brutality or mercy?
It is time to choose.

Oh, my best friend...
my oldest enemy...
how do you do?

Sitting in the crowd,
Let them think I'm crazy.

Let me let go of ego,
Let me drop that mask.

Power is within, now.
Freedom is here, now.

Am I crazy — or awake?
I'm feeling alive, now.

every word i ever wrote is for you,
every breath i ever took is for you.
you're the version of me that lives on in my head,
kept alive by the lives that i haven't lived.
you're the reason why i'm still here.
i'm afraid,
i'm afraid of the stillness that captures the thoughts
and refuses to give them back.
there you are.
all these years between us, but there you are.
there i am, all alone, cold and terrified
of the day that will come, but i'm still here,
locked up in a room inside my mind.
you're alive, so alive despite everything,
and i owe you a second chance at life.
you're the reason why both of us aren't dead.
every breath i ever took is for you,
every word i ever wrote is for you.