I lay here waiting in my skin for the tearing of the membrane
that seperates this world from the next one and I let myself
get carried along by a fresh stream of reasoning until I
flare up in the dark like a new species of amoeba

this balancing and spinning around on an atom and just not
falling off it becomes boring at times and maybe because of that
sporules once landed here to grant us the possibility
of another possibility

I lay here waiting and I manage not to drown just like only
an almost newborn baby can and being born in 1983
means nothing here in the swelling infinity
of the abnormal

my skin has been waiting for new atmospheres for decades
and the touch of unknown forms makes me shudder with
raw impervious happiness because invisible energy
effervesces alongside my arms and the eyes in my skull
could be anyone’s right now

suddenly the waiting is forgotten and I wallow myself
in the gathered fairy tales of every soul that preceded me
carelessly astonished and uncapable of understanding
the seriousness of this absurd life

inside me irrational poetry dances
like a tribe jumping around a bonfire

outside the universe
dances her own eternity
round and round

Mrs Little Spider.




spinning little spider making all your webs;

you make em coz you're hungry then you make some baby little eggs.

what's wrong little spider you're looking very old;

your children have all grown up but you look sad sitting on the window sill gettin chilly and cold.

settle down little spider I'm sure you know that life to you is held so very dear;

and when you go to heaven you know that your children and I will shed a little tear.

so good night little spider with your spindly little legs;

I've enjoyed your company very much and thank you for keeping the flies away with your beautifully symmetrical perfect spinning webs.


Goodbye............................. Mrs Little spider.

It was the same when I gazed into the abyss
The eyes of the unknown catching my attention
Haunting in that I could not tear my eyes away
Every moment we lock into eachother I'm losing my memory
Every sight of your smile and the taste of your laugh on my lips

My heartbeat quickens when we touch, and I lose the ability to speak...

And you might be a grand idea or a chemical in my brain
You might be my savior or a heavy dream
You could bring me out of misery or take me to the depths
Whatever you want, whatever happens is my fate now

I'll leave my companions to stay by your side
I'll enjoy the silence of each our minds working separately
It's okay if you don't try to impress me
It's okay if I don't astound you
I'll take extra steps to be careful this time
I'll take my inner light and wear it on my skin

It's okay if you don't notice my chest heave when you're near...

And you could be a grand idea or a chemical in my brain
You could be my savior or a heavy dream
You have the power to raise me from my misery
But with a small word you could send me to the deep
(x2)

Whatever happens
Whatever happens is my fate now...

You've got to be a grand idea stemming from chemicals in my brain
You're a savior in my heavy dreams
You use your power to raise me from my misery
And drag me from the dark deep

You're the humming in my lips that drives me to sing
You're the burning in my legs that moves me to dance
You placed your hand into my head and left prints
Now there are places still feel you
There are places you belong

You could be a grand idea or a chemical in my brain
Causing me to break down and go insane
You could be a savior or a heavy dream
You save me from myself
Whatever happens is my fate now

i'd like to expand your consciousness
darling tell me how to accomplish this
dwelling in sheer confidence
where existence can't seem to conquer it
a look of pure astonishment
pronouncing every consonant
your words fail to reach my grip
as they melt off your tongue and lips.

Looking out this double-paned plate glass window into the gray frigidity and red-leaved bitterness of October in one of the last wild and still-untamed bastions of freedom in the west at the mountains thinking about how even they are moving, my darling, and how the spaces in between them are growing just like the space in between the sun and the earth and the space between all the galaxies all at once and the space between the spaces between the world and I and soon I’ll just be floating all by my lonesome in some swirling pool of- not air, no, not even air, just nothingness and watching everything float away like disappearing city limits from the tailgate of a truck on cruise control zipping across the badlands and maybe you’ll be there but going the opposite way and there’ll be nothing to do but watch it all go, go, go, til it’s
gone, gone, gone

STOP!
CROSS ON GREEN ONLY!
ONE WAY!
WARNING DO NOT ENTER PRIVATE PROPERTY!
NO TRESPASSING!
NO LOITERING!
VAGRANTS WILL BE PROSECUTED!
DEAD END!
Oooh my, can't stand this any more sooo...

...Felt a strange urge
in my legs
jumped into my car
wanted F R E E D O M,
craved   F R E E D O M,
freedom away from
this imprisoning sign-city

Felt the true call of nature
Felt my natural urge to e x p a n d
needed my
ROAMING grounds
once more

Fled for o p e n country s p a c e s
where FREEDOM reigns
like, like refreshing droplets of spring water

BOLTED out of my car
where mother earth
cushioned my feet,
caressed me,
hugged me,
And go so far as to say,
even crawled into my jeans
and heard harmonious
chirping birds

Felt this strange twinge
in my calves
Ran like a deer
Ran into e x p a n d I n g  o p e n  s p a c e s
                                  flight
Felt my legs take
practically off ground

Felt twigs, grass and weeds
gently stroke my ankles and calves
Felt country refreshing cool air
breeze my whole body;
and whizz
up my nostrils
BUT SUDDENLY!!
I trip over something,
it's a rusty large sign reading,
"KEEP OUT INTRUDERS WILL BE PROSECUTED
PRIVATE PROPERTY"

There is no storm.
There is no expanding.
If you listen carefully you can hear the heart.
Red.
Before me.
Sun.
Blood.
War.