After he ruined me and tore my self esteem into pieces sending me in a downwards spiral straight to the hospital once again. I sat there with an iv through my vein and a hole in my chest; and I still wanted him to love me. I wanted him to check up on me to see if I was okay. I wanted him to think losing me was the worst mistake of his life. I wanted him to miss me like I missed him.

-k.f.

It hit me that I was waiting around. Why and what the hell was I waiting around for? An apology? A moment where he would beg for me back? Because when it comes down to it, none of that matters. I was waiting. I was waiting, while he was doing absolutely nothing. I was trying. I was giving him chance after chance to get his act together. And guess what? Still nothing. And that is complete and utterly unfair. If he wasn't doing anything than I sure as hell shouldn't waste my time waiting and beginning to nothing as well. My body became stagnant; as if he ****** me dry of every passion I had. I took a deep breath in, filling my lungs with laughs and memories because god knows those times between us were magic. When I exhaled, I released every inch of you down to the way you were so insecure, I started to question my worth. I am a masterpiece and I am interesting and I am filled with not only compassion but love and I can promise whoever is reading this that I will never let someone make me feel even a pinch less ever again.

-k.f

But now you have a sleeve of tattoos and sleep next to a girl who claims she loves you.

-k.f

And when I looked around the room, the room that was holding only my best pals I drowned out every uproar, every babel and every whisper. My vision went into slow motion as if I was part of a cliche romantic comedy. That's when it hit me. This idea of "love" everyone talks about isn't real. Love isn't crazy, it's not a movie scene, it's not selfish, and it's not complicated. Love isn't violently crying at 4 am over a boy thinking "he's my whole world" and "I can't live without him." Love is hanging out anywhere with your best friends, the friends that genuinely care for your well being. Love is laughing with them until your stomach hurts, laughing until it's almost morning and not giving a single **** that you didn't get any sleep. At the end of the day, that's the love I live for.

k.f.

the blue color of the sky.
the feeling of missing something,
I never was able to call mine in the first place.
the view of my sunset out my window.
the playlist I listen to, to help me sleep.
somehow, it all leads back to you and only you.