He leaves
a perpetual question mark

Closes a gap
opens a new one

Buries me
In burning drags
And powder

I am a pawn, a
Vague magnet

Easing myself
Between the
Lines
I expect to
Fill

This can't be real
This pain I feel
I'm in a dark cave
All alone never to be saved

Won't somebody find me?
Open my eyes, let me see
Bring me back into the light
Into happiness and what's right

I hide myself under a pile of lies
So no one sees the secrets behind these immortal eyes

No one understands and they never will
Why my life is like a big long bill
I have to pay the price of living
It's myself that I am giving

Depression is what drags me under
Why can't they hear my screams I wonder
I'm screaming to you
Please help me through

There has to me more than this
Somewhere out there, there must be bliss
But until I find it I am here
In this pool of unforgiving tears.

Even if you keep on dragging me back, pulling me down, I'll only keep on shooting up like an arrow towards the target.

{ E.I }

Who are we?
Walking around proudly
With our heads to god,
So easily bearing
Satan's hands on our ankles
To drag us down, we
Can fly until the planes crumble
Until the balloons pop
Can climb until the mountains
Cease, but we
Never realized that for all we go up
Must come down,  and
Leave us yearning for the skies again.
So lay flat on the ground
With your eyes to the stars
Give Satan your limbs
And God,  your head and heart

My heart wavers between ancient
and fresh.
You drag me down the water
with your anchor of false hopes.
And he wide opens his arms,
the door, his heart
then looks at me
And tells me I am free.


-- Eleanor

Every day the pieces of you that still remain under my bed
crawl closer and closer to the front door
in an attempt to escape, unnoticed
and with one starving hand out the door
I ****** them up and drag them back to the home I've forced upon them
because I can't bear the thought of them dying in anyone's presence
other than my own.

Teetering on the edge of insanity
Trying to find a center of Gravity
Cutting off my circulation
in order to make this declaration
about my queen-born ability
to walk with such fabulosity.
Though this gown's a monstrosity,
my hair a curiosity,
there's much about this lofty gait
that I did not anticipate.
Like how the swinging of my hips
counters the sway of my fingertips.
Who knew there would be such an orchestration?
A body in concert - a standing ovation!
And every step another encore,
deliriously shouting, "More! More! More!"
And suddenly, the world is new.
I've never seen it from this point of view.
Amazing the difference a few inches can make
to change the reality which I now create.
And though my feet are squeezed like stumps
into these six-inch stiletto pumps,
a testimonial I must profess;
How wonderful it is
to be a boy in a dress.