Living a life like mine is like living through a deck of cards
At first everything seems easy, seems simple,
And then out of nowhere,  everything then becomes hard
There's the cards that are numbered 1-10
Those cards are nice, low, and calm;
I also have days where I'm nice, low, and calm… but not often
Then there's the cards that start with an Ace..
This is a tricky card as it can represent two different things;
1 or 11, depends on the game or the strategy you're using
I have multiple days of being an Ace, why?
Because of the pain I hide on my face
Because of the feeling that I belong somewhere, yet still out of place
I can relate to being an Ace because there are days and times
Where I don't know if I'm coming or going,
or who I even want to be sometimes,
Like some days I love nothing but silence,
Then some other days, I love the soothing sound of windchimes
See how confusing it is living a life as if you were a deck of cards?
I don't know how I do it honestly, life sometimes gets really too hard
Coming next is the King and Queen. Rawr.
Somedays I feel like I am all mighty!
Those are the days I like to keep everything including myself tidy!
But, if I'm not next to my King, then that's when I become A Jack..
A complete and miserable Jack..***!
My moods change quicker than I can even try to begin to get grasped!
I look forward to my future; and although it;
might be kind of hard to see or believe, I do
But when I'm being a *******, time stops,
everything stops, I lose focus and I lose my breath and then I collapse
Because those are the days I'm usually getting stuck remembering my past
Then you have the Joker Card, oooh this is my favorite card
Here's why, It doesn't have a set label, it can be its own thing
I have several days where I don't know what tomorrow will bring
Moods swinging near or far, barely hanging on by a thread
Wishing some days that I can take back certain words I've ever said
But that's not how life works, especially not a life like a deck of cards
Moods are okay today, but what about tomorrow? Or the next day?
Jokers are my type of card to play, just be careful what you do or say
I'm not a mean person by nature or by blood,
but it's something I've gotten good at these days
I'm living my life with multiple moods,
And possibly even with multiple personalities;
But somewhere along the cards in my brain, I'm somewhat tamed
I may be put together well on the outside;
But if you ever lived a life like mine, you'd never be the same
Because I won't lie, some days I hear nothing on the inside;
And some other days I hear voices that drive me absolutely insane
And living in today's society, and in today's day in age;
And because my moods are so relatable to the characters in a deck of cards
I have earned the jester of having Jekyll & Hyde as my middle name
I know I need to get my mind right, I'm not going to give up or stray
But I'm currently stuck in my own terrifying ways,
and I'm not sure if I really want to change.


Stephanie A. Ludwig
04/21/2025

Meal's on you, ace.
Meals of you, ace.
As just but a deck of cards
Among tables of strung-out gamblers;
What's blackjack to a game of craps?
Suppose it's a matter
Of the rules of the sitting chaps,
Though I've never seen drunks wetter.
It's innumerable cards of the same face,
For each is but another portrait of indifference.
It's innumerable dealers of the same things,
For each is closer in similarity than farther in dissension.

To love to play
Is not the same as a play of love.

Yet, to make life a game
Is not the same as the "game" of life itself.

Deck of cards,
Pictured scenes,
Pastel backs.

Just have to remember,
In order to play memory,
But no one will remember me.

MON

Man's best friend is his worst fiend.
Tip the photographer, not the dealer
let alone the unlucky charm.

As a bucketbot
I have a spare part
sadly kidney lost
broken heart left
Kiba got his cut.

That hand's bet...
dead-certain-debt

One question left:
Did he eat or sell it?
Goofy plushky white fur  
by no means pure
paws all false pretense...

Italian goon!
Couldn't be more tense.
I am a goner!

Tears cast shadows; I can still hear your quiet sobs echoing
in the night; the love etched into your skin is crumbling under
the weight of this love game, much like a fragile house of cards.
Could I offer you a more favourable deal at discovering love?
Do you still recognize the beauty that resides within you, or have
the echoes of those who captured your heart dulled your shine,
leaving only the sting of their betrayal?

I’m on a quest to find the melody that resonates with your heart;
though it feels as elusive as seeking out David’s hidden chord.
It’s as if your inner strength has been severed, much like Samson’s
locks. But if I were to gently knock on the door of your heart, would
you welcome me in, or would you push away my advances, toppling
the pillars that support my pride? I can’t help but wonder if I’ll
ever see you again.

MAGICIANS can do
AMAZING THINGS like
pulling a RABBIT
out of its HAT,
SAWING A LADY
or the SLIGHT of HAND,
Now what do you
think of THAT??
We are just AMAZED,
Have us talking for DAYS,
On how we think it was DONE,
The MAGICIANS never
reveal the secrets
Otherwise, WATCHING
it was FUN!!!!


B.R.
Date: 9/10/2024

Yes, I’m designing gift cards today; I'm crafting another creative hope, Despite all the gift cards that you tore apart. I’m not creating them to feed your greed anymore; I’m mastering them for this beautiful world, outside of my grief.

There exist two-sided planes of loss and gain
That exists both as a way of life and as a versatile toy
Bringing forth to a person either happiness or pain
It can hold our desires and was made for us to enjoy

You can cut it in the center, many in the world do
Stack it from one another and anything you decided to
It was created to flourish and be pleasing to the eye
It is a wonder with a cacophony of colors dyed

It is made for us, that which in the rules abide
And like good and evil, it has two sides
It is a friend of magic and a friend of trickery
Both is to deceive, one for joy and one for tragedy

Often, it has a bad reputation in the eyes of many
A tool for treachery and a miserable man’s destiny
But I tell you, it is the one that holds that give its voice
For it is an instrument that can either play a hymn or a noise