It's always when the magic hits that blissful ****** up buzz I'm alone in the bar putting up the stools up closing down as usal.

I always have one behind the bar light a cigar just soak in the silence .
It's then when it all comes back in a flood to me .

The faces of those passsed my brothers.
I pour a shot of borbon for them each.
Always making mine a double .

I imagine there laughs the bad jokes and great conversations we no longer share .

William always playing the jukebox that trademark laugh that could light a room.
Bob Warren cracking people up hitting on the women he was a one man sideshow and a old vet.

Bone .
My closest brother the guy who ****** everyone off and always made me laugh .
We'd talk for hours kick back the drinks and torment everyone around us.

Cause if we didnt **** with you.
We truly didnt give a **** about you.
I had burried them all as alone now i stand .

The smoke hung in the air as i saw them all and for a moment i wasnt alone.

It always hit hardest on nights like these .
The women will all leave you .
Love is a fire that burns beyond are control.

But the memories are the tressure bury them deep only to dig them up when you are alone .

I drank each shot as one by one they vanished from sight.
I do not believe I can bury another .

I guess in all truth I hope the next is me..


I closed the door locked it behind me the air outside was frozen.
My breath shown on the walk home.

I was alone .

Sometimes the page is far more simple than reallity of this existence.
I'm glad to have shared one last round with friends .

We can write the ending.
But life always seems to see it a different way.

Cheers

Gonz

I brag about my prowess
But I’m really a big mess.
The truth is I’m coasting
Nearly roasting in the fire,
The one I lit when younger
Full of burning desire
And right down to the wire
I hid, lied, swindled me
Double-handedly, as if
There was a rift between
Myself and the truth.
This was my youth.

I believed lies I was told
If I liked them better than truth;
I was such a shallow  youth
And the swindlers could see
When I was coming down the road
They’d load me on with their stories
About what great glories lie
In putting people down so
i could rise as high as the sky
With just a little lie or two.
How easy it was to do;
To lie my way through.

It would be years before
The score would catch me
And ****** me out of my pride
And get me to walk alongside
Those I had walked on, cheated.
At every point I was greeted
With reality standing next to poetry;
The myths that were my story
With very little glory in them.
They were sort of a battle hymn
Of someone who always before
Fought all the wrong wars
And called the dead losers.
Oh, and I was a big ******.

Does that explain a great deal?
That I really didn’t feel,
That I was on autopilot
And made sure to deny it;
That *** was my navigator
And hope was an alligator
Just about to consume me.
You could costume me, but
The way I talked and walked
Gave me away, every time.
Lying was my crime, nor was I
All that good at it. I failed;
I went to jail and confession
But none of these sessions
Helped me at all.
My heart was too small.
My pride too tall.

I once heard a story
Of a boy who loved a girl.
I heard she let him love her
Until her mind grew bored.

Then she packed his measly bags
And kicked him to the curb.
She crushed his bleeding heart
On his way out the door.

He never even had the chance
To scrape the pieces off her porch.
Now there is a jagged cavern
Burned into his broken chest.
Filled with *****,self-hate, and ***

He never even had a chance.

-ARI

Ninety-two days, since my last drink.
The first week I was stranded.
Lost in a desert, parched.

The coldest, freshest water was dust in my mouth.
I couldn't quench my thirst.
Nothing brought that refreshing sensation;
That overwhelming elation that my first beer had each day.

Whenever I took my first sip, I felt enlightened.
My soul beemed with joy.
Nothing else mattered after that first sip.
All the word was irrelevant compared to me and my drink.

And that was the problem.
It was all irrelevant.
Beer was my partner.
Scotch was my lover.
Brandy, my best friend.

And I, was an alcoholic.
I AM, an acoholic.
Ninety-two days into recovery.
Ninety-two days into the rest of my life.

I used to be afraid to inhale
But I've been to hell and back
I still don't think I've sinned enough
But I understand, now, why people smoke their lungs black.

Everyone's got their poison,
And we each have to choose
Based on what has shaped us
Whether it's ***, cigarettes, drugs, or *****.

It's not up to me to judge you
We're all just doing our best to get by
At the end of the day, whatever the vice
We're all just wandering through life high.

The handshake comes much quicker
Than it used to in the days
When he held his liquor better
Those times are far away
"Let me shake you by the hand"
he'd bellow in the bar
But, now his grip is weaker
Than it once had been, by far
He used to drink 'till closing
Now, two beers and he is done
He no longer knows his limit
He no longer drinks for fun
The drinks control his shaking
Keep him centered, full of hate
Once he shakes you by the hand
It means things aren't so great
He squeezes hard to make you hurt
Trying to show what he once was
But it only shows his smallness
It accentuates his flaws
Mr "Let me shake you by the hand"
Is in every bar we know
He's quiet when he gets there
But he's loud when time to go
He no longer rules the table
He's just an old drunk in the back
He used to be the favorite
He no longer has that knack
He'll always be a little man
He'll never look you in the eye
Mr. "Let me shake you by the hand"
Will be the same until he dies
In his mind he's full of power
But his body shows what's real
A strong wind would break this man in half
I can't guess how his wife feels
Two beers can change his being
From someone pleasant to an ***
"Mr. Let me shake you by the hand"
gets drunk and turns quite crass
If you ever go out drinking
And your evening is planned
Leave...and in a hurry
If you hear ...."shake your hand."