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Arke Aug 2019
love, did you know
that every diamond
is made from death
compressed and contorted
transformed into something
just beautiful enough to wear
i was once carbon and oxygen
the weight of the earth on my chest
i'll never be as clear nor brilliant but still
you've worn me just the same
eliminated my multi-faceted edges
polished, a rock as any other
no one would believe i was a gem
i am made of dead things, worn out
eroded through the years
i can't sparkle the way you want me to
can't pretend to shine for only you
throw me back to the earth
i belong with the oceans and mosses
only through an end will i glow
I wish I had known who was standing in front of me,
Before I had to watch him leave

I wish I could have gone a bit deeper, trust his intentions,
But when I’m scared all I listen to is my apprehension

I wish I was brave enough to give us a shot
and if you chose to let me go
i know it was just my fault.

And so it goes
Bracing myself for the worst,
going out of my way not to get hurt
Building enormous walls
and then beating myself up for it all

My only hope is that you know
You deserve all the love
I was reluctant to give you

Maybe someday, when we find our hearts to be relieved
from all the things that are troubling them
We can start all over again
far away from this pain

This was my miscalculation. I make many, nothing new.

I hope it’s not too late to make it up to you.
John H Dillinger Aug 2019
The Lightning Bolt

A spark,
The first beat of a new formed heart,
The Start -
A new journey begins.

And although the destination is always home,
Exactly where it started,
She understands that what is really important
Is what the journey has imparted.

So, She packs up the old car with just enough,
What She really needs lies just off the road ahead:
In each warm meal she's fed,
Each new path she treads,

Each warm bed,
With pleasant company.
She lets Her mind adjust to thinking free,
Opens it to a thousand new born possibilities,

Conceived somewhere between the highest mountain
To where the land is caressed by sea,
Where She
Is ready to jump in.


She stops, first, at a highland lake,
Sits at the waters edge watching purpling clouds
Gathering in the reflection of the water,
Hugging Her knees tight.

The hair on Her arms begins to stand up,
Her grip on Herself crescendos,
Adrenaline forces Her to feel Her heart,
Just as the storm is about to start.

The electric light,
Blue, Purple and Hot White,
The water bouncing Light,
So bright,
It stole Her breath.

Then it rippled it toward Her in a rumble;
It grew, now roaring,
She tucked Her face into Her knees
And felt Her breath tugging at the trees.

She caught it there, with Her frantic heart,
And forced Her eyes to take a glance,
To behold this violent beauty, this was Her chance,
So, abandoning all Her fear,
She began to dance.

The rain fell hard
And each of Her senses became flooded:

The taste of fresh rain & sweat,
The clothes now clinging to Her skin.
It evaporated all regret
As She listened to the world sing.


She lost Herself at that lonesome lake,
Taken off with the storm and lightning
But the thought only made Her smile,
It wasn't frighting.

Whatever moved Her muscles now
Carried Her to the car, dripping, sodden.
She turned the key in the ignition
And on the radio came something She'd forgotten.

The melody clung to Her like Her clothes,
It drew memories that washed over Her,
Like the rain moments before,
She quickly turned off the ignition
But the key couldn't close that door,
Swung open by the vibrations -

She came back to Herself like a hard-felt revelation.

She smiled then and collapsed on the steering wheel,
In awe of the indulgent moment,
Knowing what it was, in one way,
To be taken apart, all those components,

Scattered in the storm,
Only to be reborn.


As the clouds passed that day,
Summer arrived,
Blooming flowers in the meadows
And along the roadside.

She tried to push on,
But Summer was insistent,
It told Her, take it easy,
It's seductive tone not easily resisted.

And Thus Her journey changed it's course,
Bending, as things do, to even the gentlest force
Like a leaf in a summer's breeze;
She could feel life begin to tickle and tease

And on, And please...
Written for a friend, a beautiful soul and a dreamer..
claire Aug 2019
When I was young
I wanted a canopy bed
They say seeing is believing but
I thought that not seeing was the same as
Believing you were safe

When I was young
I feared house fires and
Losing my mom in the aisles
But now I know she'd always come back to find me
No matter the flame

I'm blind on the way home
All I see are glowing golden arrows
All I hear are growling stomachs
All I feel are these growing pains
I pause on the way home
Only turn on when my ears are covered
This is over, this is over

When I was young
I searched for people like me
But it was impossible when I didn't know myself
Now I've collected a few
Enough for my two narrow hands to hold

When I was young
We took family pictures
Now there's vacancies
And I've learned that growing up is
Skipping changes and missing birthdays

I'm blind on the way home
All I see are glowing golden arrows
All I hear are growling stomachs
All I feel are these growing pains
I pause on the way home
Only turn on when my ears are covered
This is over, this is over

We are over, this is over
a reflection on change, especially the change from child to adult.
دema flutter Aug 2019
i don’t trust you
to love me through
thick and thin,
when you’re
holding my hand
and when the
distances grow
unplanned,
to think of me
always and
not just when
you need a fan,
when you know
me by heart
but not understand,
to give me space
and not let me
push you away,
when i need your
presence and
your silence as well,
to help me through
my mistakes but
not ease the pain,
when you share
who you are with me
and i don’t get scared.
EmVidar Aug 2019
I'm sorry to all the words
we did not say
and I'm sorry to you
for saying all the useless ones
that we did

-em vidar
happy birthday to you, I hope you find a love you want to hang on to
EmVidar Aug 2019
We loved in a way
even I don't understand
and we left each other
you for another
and me
to save the pieces
he hadn't broken yet

-em vidar
Keiri Aug 2019
It's a morning world in my evening life.
It's a genderless world of husband and wife.
It's a green world with a dusty end.
It's a lonely world with nearly no friend.

It's a dawn new world in my twilight life.
It's a new beginning in my honey hive.
It's a slimy end for my gruesome begin.
It's a lonely day for me and my sin.

It's a sunny world in my rainy life.
It's a waterless world and a pointless dive.
It's a lovely day for my night to come.
It's a horroble night and my head goes numb.

It's a bright world in my dark life.
It's a weird dansfloor, for my mistimed jive.
It's a beautiful butterfly for my bitter sky.
It's the worst timing ever, to ask myself why.
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