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Rubyredheart Apr 17
Constricted
Restricted
Predicted
I Sigh
Addicted
conflicted
Resisted
a cry
Erase
Need space
Retrace
Still try
but why?!
Convicted
Depicted
Existed
A lie?
another good-bye?

Unspoken.
No token.

once broken
twice shy
Rubyredheart Apr 16
I’m sorry for not hearing
When life was stressful
When your loved ones were hurting
Or when one had hurt you.

I’m sorry for worrying that what you might
or might not choose to do could affect me
more than considering the pain you suffered

I’m sorry for being impatient.
I’m sorry for being needy.

I’m sorry for relating stories--
knives that sliced your heart

I’m sorry for making it all about me.

I’m sorry for not being there
when you looked for a friend;
& for being there too loudly
as I searched for a listening caring ear.

I’m sorry I lack the skill
You apparently acquired through the years
of sealing the past in a photo book
forgotten on a shelf.

I’m sorry for wanting to roll back the tape
then sit wrapped up on the couch with you.

I’m sorry I still haven’t erased your life
from the plethora of "Someday" snapshots.
I’m sorry for wanting a redo
of all those times in the past when
I wasn’t a very good friend.

I know you are different...
but so am I.
I am so very very sorry for all those ways
I hurt you.
I’m trying to grow into a better me.
I just wish we could meet each other
as Who we each are today
I do believe that if we did
we would only be better Friends.
written 1st May 2022
Rubyredheart Apr 16
You are the Sun in my skies  
You are the Light of my life  
You help me grow  
You warm my soul  
You are my Sun shining bright  

You are the Moon in my night  
Reflecting again my light  
So I may know  
I have a glow  
You are the Moon in my life  

You are my sky-full of Stars  
Immense sphere of heat. Though now far,  
Still you shine here  
Sparking my cheer  
You are the Stars in my sky  

Sun moon and stars through the years  
Always in my heart most dear  
In time we’ll find  
Shared peace of mind  
When constellations collide  

Someday a nebular prime  
Collecting our space dust of time  
Will burst in bright pillars of recreation,  
Merging our stars with illumination  

Where light-speed erases the distance  
Our twin loves are free  
Together we’ll be  
Orbits shared finally  

Someday  
our space will collide
https://sites.middlebury.edu/landandlens/2016/10/16/2119/
See above link for the images that inspired this write.  Towers of cosmic dust and gas make up part of the Eagle Nebula. These so-called Pillars of Creation are part of an active star-forming region within the nebula.

written 16th May 2022
Rubyredheart Apr 15
Cry
I miss your friendship!
I miss knowing...
There are so many reasons tumbling ‘round my head
As possibilities for why you’ve locked me out
They all begin with hurt and end with tears

I cried again tonight
wondering on the wrongs I might have done
I truly am so sorry
For every single one
I just want...
so very much I want
to know of you
to hear of you
as told by you.

Yet clearly this
is far too much to ask
i cry
missing you
written 1st May 2022
Rubyredheart Apr 15
I woke up in the early morning hours
Insomnia—such a ***** sometimes
But this time, I didn’t mind
All was quiet
Even my thoughts were calm
Deep in waking dreams of love
I relished the alone hour with you

I wonder: Was your mind with me too?

Good morning, Love,
Today I woke up twice to you,
Making it a morning with a double shot of "good".

I hope my love
blankets you with peace and comfort as you sleep
So that you, too, might wake
to a double shot of "good"
when your morning rises.
written 7th Jan 2023
Rubyredheart Apr 15
When we first met
I knew of little else--
Ignorant and innocent
You were my greatest love

Now I’ve been around
Sampled years of life
Yet I desire no one else
You ARE my greatest love
written 7th Jan 2022
Rubyredheart Apr 15
flying free at night
twin sharp teeth of white
blood red need, throbbing bleed
ageless faces of eternal longing
blessed bite that brings belonging
fall towards my embrace
melancholy trace trickling from his tongue
naked mouth and I’m undone

Take my all, welcomed fiend
My hate, my love, my in-between
Ravish lips to lips and enter in
Forever hold, embrace of sin
Until I taste of your inferno
Together our memory eternal
written 29th Oct 2021
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