My head is spinning, and i cant seem to stabilize.
I feel the constant pressure of stress that continues to rise.
So much to do but i am held captive by my fight or flight.
Frozen in place not sure which movement is right.
Feels like a heart attack this level of anxiety! Full force panic i don’t know how to break free!
From one task to another i coast through my day.
Nothing ever getting finished my failures on display!
I go to bed at night exhaustion overwhelming me,
but lie awake antagonized by the voices i cant break free!
Sleep does no good anyway when peace is what you need.
Ask myself if you believe the smile or enjoy watching me bleed?
Look in the mirror at my eyes then quickly look away.
When did the hollow grow so deep i fall down and pray!
God i am not sure i can take another lesson…
i feel blown apart lost with no direction..
I know growth is painful and change is hard…
But i feel so shattered nothing but a shard..
Where are you God?  Please don’t leave me in this place.
Sitting here afraid and hurting but seeking your face.