Can't you see me? Can't you see? How its supposed to be You had to teach me
A burdensome chore You chose to ignore So you left me alone Wondering why I did so on my own
Now I know nothing I'm always running Under the pressure I'm crumbling
The unformed person Hiding behind the curtain Ashamed of being the burden
Now you can't see- but when you think of me I'm gone and you're still Hating me
How I'm ought to be It isn't clear to me And I'm sure you'd happily agree I am lost at sea
You were so headstrong About knowing all along I was unworthy and ugly, loud and wrong Now I suffer Nowhere to belong
You can no longer tell me to go This is my home Piece by piece, blood and bone I built it on my own
You know of my unbearable pain Trying to live life your way And you know I couldn't stay When you were the one sending me away
I don't want to grow old With my life feeling cold All thrown away Feeling myself decay
Its not my responsibility Your incivility Never a child to you, But a void of hostility
Your high horse far away from me And I know, that even though I can't see you looking down It is a certainty
Creative were your reasons To deny the diseases That plagued our house of stalled seasons So look away, so you don't need to believe in The winter that we lived in
Deny, deny, deny The distance between you and I Came from you, and your willingness to Misidentify "This child is not mine, It Chooses to defy, There is Rot inside." And I can never be satisfied With your answers when I ask why
"You, you, you- You chose to do- Everything bad that happened to you."
How could I When I was the child in knots And you were the tie
If I am a Bad Egg- and I am Rotten - Then you were the Broken, Beaten Down fridge that I was in
For my mother. I never wished it of you, but I will die someday, just like you want me to. And maybe then, you could finally be proud. Or at least, you could finally stop haunting me.