i would rather write than speak
but i wish through these words you could hear me
i do not like to be
open, or vulnerable
and if you are reading my writing
please do not look at me
imagining these words rolling and flowing off the tip of my tongue
makes me
small, shrinking endlessly
into possibilities of you
and me
          and me
                    and you
you reading these words
makes me insecure, scared, and alone
i wish i had the voice to be heard
i am not scared of you
but of what you will think of me