I said to him
And he gave me one of those
looks.

Like he didn't know
What the **** I was talking about
As if I was the crazy one

It tears the soul
And it should.
To not feel happiness for years
To not remember the last time
you gave into a feeling of content.
"I'm good enough"
Were the words that couldn't
mend.

There is no point in lying
To the soul.
There is no point in trying
To forgive.
You're not crying for anyone
standing outside your door.
No one calling you when
you're walking home
alone.

As if I even for a moment
Could float on innocence
Could rest in optimism
Look myself in the mirror
And toast my own well-being.

No.

I'm sorry I didn't choose the other road
I guess I just couldn't see it from where I was standing.
I guess I'll probably find it again.
I guess life turns at some point.
But alas, I'm only guessing.