Petals of red, the newest bloom in a cycle of seasons I
wade through with my body
holding nothing else but the ghost of a child:

supposedly this is life
and life is a horror story, but it is no coincidence that
this did not happen until I grew
to be the length of the train on a wedding dress.

I will not apologize for finding gore so beautiful, I am
saying so because it is mine –
a slit of skin that is not from a cut
filling the whole
bathtub with blood. I dilute water and material to
make sure they stay mine, the same to men.

If this is a temple,
I want my heart to be in the basement

where everyone I love can run and hide when there is
an emergency, the safe haven
that will flood and dye his face my color because
I did not keep his child this month.

i don't believe in the hypocritical moralistic dogma of this so-called civilized society
everyone is finicky, demanding, and ignorant, like society runs on their selfish need
humanity is unhealthy, diseased, deceived by the smoke and mirrors of propriety
starving poets living off their art, starving celebrities living off their titanic sized greed
and people wonder why we have criminals who will do anything to get away with crime
if everyone saw the real side of people, trust would be another delusional superstition
guilt is like spiders crawling onto your naked skin and onto your famished spine
some people believe they are the bricks to rebuild a home with ammunition
we are force fed trust in these strangers in a extremely vulnerable habitat
like a bird's feathers clipped off, we are unable to fly, unable to breathe
like an army without weapons, we are unprepared for the sudden combat
like a witches cauldron, the brain's contents bubble and seethe

-kra

in my dreams, I found your voice whispering my name
it was so quiet, just like you, throwing your secrets in the grave
silent euphoria covering the tension in my muscles and veins
releasing the strenuous stress, but my blood still runs white
white sunlight running through me and my thoughts run to you
it's like an natural instinct, a second skin, a cause to the effect
you peer into my windows and the realization why was a slap in the face
ironic because I fell into the same guilty pleasure that you did
your spring and summer lasted me a few years, but winter came
love hibernated back into it's cave, built it's castle and lava moat
haphazardly scattered ghost starve in the back of an abandoned alley
looking for a map out of this godforsaken eath but they can't leave
not without a sign pointing them in the right direction, but i always turn left
it's like we were related by blood, but our blood learned to squander
my fingertips shake violently, do you realize how badly i need you
anxiety was taking every inch of my body and collapsing my lungs
i'm searching for a needle in a haystack and it's been found already
i'm looking for a key to the locked door but my hands are empty
i'm peering through an opening to find any source of hope for us
and i come up empty every single time.

-kra

i've given birth to a inhumane creature
breathing in mustard gas, breathing out fire
touching everything with hands like lightning
a wilted flower that surrendered to the deep cold
shredding hearts like paper with an unshakable anger
smelling fear in you, never letting myself get near you
delicate and proud, like a rose, you glisten and i rot
how can you fix something that's almost irreversible
how do you reverse a cycle that's been going for months
i'm blending into the wall of the past regrets you created
masses of failures you've been through and threw away
but i never left, i always kept my promise to you
i have to lay your face
                                       to rest
                                                  to rest
                                                           ­  to rest
                                                           ­             to rest
like a recording, playing over and over like it's taunting me
like a ghost that's been locked away, ready for the haunting
but i can't do it, dreams interrupt and ravage my troubled mind
desolate in my own mind, and i'm sleeping in this prison ward
harvest the love from my heart and unshackle my bones from this room
i've illuminated in my faith and rose above the fervent grudge i've held
detritus strikes at the dawn, and turns the moon into a cold glare
and i know i stare but you were the first beautiful thing i ever had
and i know you don't like me, but can't you stare back and see the beauty
i'm not the monster you believe i am

-kra