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  Sep 2015 Jaclyn Jackomis
Julija Ilich
I'm not the same as I was before
But I know what I was like with you

I was happy, scared, sad
Confused, cheerful, mad

Now, I don’t feel anything
  Sep 2015 Jaclyn Jackomis
stacey renei
We're only two of infinite stars.

Burning with desire,
Lusting after passion.

Caressing in the dark,
we were never a walk in the park.

Hidden and burdened,
a love that is forbidden.

No use in wishing on 11:11's,
flick away those fallen eyelashes.

A love made of tragedy,
imprinted on the stars.
Desire and passion,
ready to start a war.

Two of infinite stars,
part of different constellations,
a love, if that's what this is,
ending in entire damnation.

We're only two of infinite stars.
What made us think
we were meant to be from the start?

We're only two of infinite stars,
existing in a universe that's bound to keep us apart.
  Sep 2015 Jaclyn Jackomis
K Alexys
She's abandoned.
She's sick.
She's so sweet,
Her heart is thick.
She's full of flaws,
Scars on every inch of her skin,
She doesn't speak because no one listens.
Depressed but mistaken for happy.
Locks the emotions away when she's angry.
Pleases everyone else without acceptation for herself.
She adopted a lonely spirit,
Whom replaced the one she was born with.
Over time they beat the crap out of her,
She could only feel more alone, then.
She has so many experiences that you just would  not believe.
They'd sound like stories and even more they'd make you feel like you had just gotten beat.
They'd make you feel the need to feel free and alive,
She's been killed and brought back to this devil of her life.
She's been destroyed and put together again so many times,
She doesn't know when it'll end but she's already gone inside.
Her mind is so open you could walk right in.
Have a seat, look around, ask any questions.
You can pick her heart up and she won't even gasp,
Until you drop it and the pieces cut you like glass.
She'll run for the broom and pick it all up,
Sew together that beautiful cut.
She hopes that now she's worthy of your presence and memory.
She wants to be cared for,
She needs company.
Every day is the same for her, nothing ever changes.
The suffering is routine and she hides all the pain.
Even though she's so hurt that she has a knife by her bed,
She can not seem to think of leaving her head.
If someone should come in and sit down and read,
They too,
Will have the knife,
But never be able to leave.
  Sep 2015 Jaclyn Jackomis
picaso 29
Now let's go back, back to reality we fell for each other but there was no gravity to hold us, but I caught you, held you tight with all my might even though we were crash landing, I loved the flight, I would do it all again start from the beginning where we were just friends
I would go through the all pain I endured when you walked away just for a moment in my arms where you would lay because time with you always took my breath away
Jaclyn Jackomis Sep 2015
please come back, i miss your face

or 6 feet under i will grace
sad
  Sep 2015 Jaclyn Jackomis
macachist
for seven years i believed that i had no right to say
that i had been abused because it wasn't physical,
like my friend who was beat by her drunk father on
a daily basis.

my abuse was only on an emotional, psychological scale
and while sometimes his hand slipped or gripped too tight on me,
i honestly wouldn't count it as abuse.

recently i began reading into this and while it's not
as talked about as physical or ****** abuse it still counts
and it carries over as children grow up from these experiences.

even experiences that i didn't think counted as emotional abuse,
from times when i was far younger than just a teenager.

the abuse i've dealt with hasn't made me any stronger than i was,
it's made me the exact opposite;
instead of being the person i was before, bright and optimistic,
i'm apologizing constantly for things i don't need to and
second guessing myself and others intentions.

constantly i wonder if i'm bothering someone,
am i being too much of myself? am i allowed to speak?
does my opinion matter? is it all right to assert myself?

after being told for three years that i don't matter,
and there is no point of me for existing and that
it's no wonder i don't have any friends,
i'm trying to break myself out of the box i've placed myself in
and it's so **** hard.
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