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 Jun 2 meryem
Liana
Untitled
 Jun 2 meryem
Liana
When you fly high
The fall is hard
Whenever I have a good time and then it’s over
 May 31 meryem
lizie
my sisters
 May 31 meryem
lizie
julie is soft strength,
a quiet kind of knowing,
she says “i love you” like breathing,
and means it every time.

manda is a wildfire,
messy and loud and full of heart,
she will fight the world for you,
and never ask for thanks.

livie is my reflection,
stormy one second, laughing the next,
she understands me in a way
that doesn’t need explanation.

they hold pieces of me
i forgot i gave away,
tiny, stubborn fragments
i’d never find alone.

they are not the same.
they are not always gentle.
but they are mine.

and they are everything.
I had a soft dream,
We were lying in the grass,
Staring at the moon.
 May 30 meryem
Lyle
I no longer have the name I was given
when I was seven it was changed
"for your safety"
Like my mother would care enough to come find me
the only thing she cared about was her next fix
I didn't get a say in the changing of my birth name
They changed
One
Letter.
One letter later I had a different identity
I hated the name, told my adoptive mother so
every time she called me it I responded with
That's Not My Name.
but here I am, ten years later, responding to a name I hate
It reminds me that they didn't care enough to listen to me
That's Not My Name.
sometimes when strangers ask me for my name I am still tempted
to respond with the name of my past
it is beautiful, it was MY NAME.
All I wanted was to have an opinion, to be heard
To keep my name my name my name MY NAME.
That's not my name
From Hayley to Harley. For years I got teased and called "Harley Davidson" and "Harley Quin". Technically they changed my middle name and last name too, but changing my first name hurt worse since I hated the name SO MUCH.
 May 22 meryem
Julie
eyes
 May 22 meryem
Julie
Look
look close enough
into the eyes
of people

They speak
stories
memories
and worries

Behind them
they hide seas
full of tears

Look into the eyes of someone
and you will know them -
just then
 May 21 meryem
Lyle
loud
 May 21 meryem
Lyle
Loud, too loud
your voice rings in my ears
long after I have left
screaming, stop screaming
I can't hear myself thinking
about all the ways I can escape
quiet, too quiet
at least when you're screaming loud
I can feel something other than sad
you're just too loud
 May 21 meryem
Lyle
Falling
 May 21 meryem
Lyle
It's not the falling that hurts-
It's the before.
when you're standing on the edge
That's when it hurts.
The fall is the most freeing part-
the weightless, unburdening float towards reality
and then with a SNAP
you realize that
The landing hurts too.
You will experience pain before the fall, peace before the landing.
 May 4 meryem
Maryann I
your breath is sunlight melting frost on my skin,
your silence—moonlight in a velvet sky,
quiet, yet immense,
a hush that makes the world listen.


i wandered through golden fields,
barefoot in the hush of morning,
dew-kissed and drowsy,
where clouds drift like old lullabies—
and you,
you were waiting at the edge of dusk,
painted in indigo.

we don’t chase,
we revolve.

a soft orbit,
sunrise in your laughter,
midnight in my gaze.
we meet in the in-between—
horizon-blue, dream-drenched,
the hush of stars watching.

your warmth never scorches,
your cool never chills.
just balance.
just breath.
just
us.
 May 3 meryem
Liana
I'm the rain
I don't hurt anyone
I just exist and try to be as genuine and gentle as I can
I try to grow flowers
But they stay inside

As I pour over the town
I squint into one backyard
Where someone is dancing in the thing they are avoiding

I want them to love me even when I'm preventing the sun from going in their eyes
I want them to love me when I wasn't holding back
When I let myself be
Like they were
When they were spinning and jumping

I am rain
I am the tear of the cloud
I am everywhere
And I've seen so much
But I guess I still don't know where to fall

I am rain
And I want to be loved too
Which is why I smile when they keep their umbrella closed
And step outside
And get covered with authenticity

I am rajn
Thought
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