Her beauty is her power.
Like a shield she does wield
Enchant you. Romance you.
Turn you to a marble god

And there you will stay
Slowly chipping away
In time soon passing
Fade away, yes you pray.

And you long to hear
With your one good ear
Her silky soft voice
Just once more. One more time...
But it's not your choice.

But she left you for dead
With these empty wishes
Inside your head
Dreaming of kisses, dreaming of them
So  sweet. So tender.

See her no more.
Though her shapes are many
Voluptuous and sweet
Is the one you adore

Oh what you would give
Just to see her once more
The rich life you live
Without her is poor

She lives in myth
And you will see her, no more.
She's gone.
Fade away, she's gone.

I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since it happened. But
every time I do, I can’t help but smile.
One of those goofy, far-off smiles that make people think something is wrong with you.

Until you snap back to reality.

I don’t know how, or why it occurred, but it did.
And I must say, I’m glad.
Because I’m still grinning stupidly.

Paper hats and cigarettes
Marlboro Reds and french fries
Long road trips with windows down
Let the smoke get into your eyes

Bathroom stops at old school shops
With that filter snub in your hand
One more drag and that is that
If only, wouldn’t that be grand?

Oh, no matter what, how much I try
Is it worth the tears that I spill?
See embers glow cherry-red
You know those **** things ****.

I see you turn your head to
Take another poisoned draw
“I’ll be done, real soon” he says
It was his tragic flaw

For a real long while I was just a child
I could barely tie my own shoes.
But that was then and this is now
No exception and no excuse

Oh, no matter what, how much I tried
Was it worth the tears that I spilled?
See embers glowin’cherry-red
You knew those **** things killed.

Paper hats and cigarettes.
Marlboro Reds and French fries
I hope you see how I grew up
With the blackened tears I now cry

Every time you call my name,
I grow stronger, my heart beats again.
That’s when I think of you
And I swear I can fly.
But you never call
And I never ask why.

Slipping into tragic routine,
Always a different same old thing.
I can feel the hole in my chest
Deepening, getting larger, at best.
Every time it goes to mail.
I shed another tear, but to what ail?

Every time you call my name,
I grow stronger, my heart beats again.
That’s when I think of you
And I swear I can fly.
But you never call
And I never ask why.

And I bought a sound bite, just for you
Though I never hear it ever come through
What a waste of time, money, and space
Well I’m through with you now, so stay out of my face.
I’m tired of the games our time is done
And for what it’s worth, you were never any fun

Every time you call my name,
I grow stronger, my heart beats again.
That’s when I think of you
And I swear I can fly.
But you never called
And I never asked why.

He painted it red

And he’s starting to pray

Had things stayed the same

It wouldn’t have been this way


He sits in the bar

And stares at the monitor

Searching through the screen

Remembers to forget her.


With a hole in his heart

And a head full of liquor

He heads out the door,

Knowing nothing for sure


Speeding down the street

With windows drawn down

Suddenly he smiles

He's going to leave town.


Away with the wind

He flies past the road

There's no way of knowing

How far he could go


He painted it red

And he’s starting to pray

Had things stayed the same

It wouldn’t have been this way

It’s hard to believe
6 years have passed.

It’s difficult to comprehend
The feelings that you
Harbored in your heart
Are still alive

In the chamber of the Russian.
Eager to touch my skin
Just wishing to cut through
To where my soul resides,

In pieces as it may be.
There, these feelings,
Yearn to caress the forbidden
Flesh of the heart.

Just longing for a taste.
An eternity of waiting.
Suffering through patience.
Can practically hear the demons.

And with a sudden
spark of light and smoke,
Everything becomes black.
Then it’s over.

6 years of being starved in the dark
Will do that to you.

I step out of the shower as
Steam rises off of my cold wet body.

Standing there. Naked.
I catch my own reflection in the mirror.
I feel shy, almost embarrassed.
This is who I am.

I dress in the soft white towel from the rack.
Feeling slightly warmer already.

Next are the undergarments.
Perhaps today is the day.
It will happen soon enough.
Just wishing I’d feel the same as before.

Jeans and a light cotton shirt today.
I laugh, remembering what he said
In class the other day.
Maybe I was that clever too.

Sweater.
Now I’m in the middle.
Directing the whole video now.
Still wanting to be in that towel.

Reach for the coat.
Now, I am untouchable.
No one can understand
The possibilities of my mind.
I can’t let them.

And out the door, I go dressed as such.