Dear little free bird,
Where have you gone?
It has been far too long
And we all miss your sweet little songs.

Dear little lost bird,
Your wings are clipped
Your feathers stripped
You've cut off the remainders of your wings
So sing, little bird, sing
And scream, little bird, scream
Feel free to bleed
If it's the only way you have left to dream.

Dear little caged bird,
You are weighed down
By the shackles on your feet
And these iron bars of the cage they keep you in
Have all but killed you
So write, little bird, write
It's all you have left.

My ears crave
The music of your voice
My lips covet
The familiar taste of your mouth
My eyes search for
The beautiful contours
Of your face
I anticipate
The scent of your skin
My flesh aches
For the flame of yours on mine
I am needing
Waiting
Wanting
You

Feel the heat from your skin
Brushing but never touching
Inhaling the air from your lungs
Sweet as nectar on my tongue
My entire being
Hungers for just a taste
Just a little
Of what you are

You have taken my mind
Stolen my heart
And collected my soul

You are pumping through my blood
Whittled into my bone
And inscribed on my skin

You haunt my waking hours
Ghosting among the numbers
Hidden within the harmonies
Tucked between the letters and rhymes

You occupy
My sleeping minutes
Though tonight I have none

My hands tremble
It has been too long
My heart is raw
And my lips are dry
Parched
Thirsty
My stomachs twists
I am starving  
With a kind of need
That cannot be satisfied
By dreams and played back memories
No.  
My body
Is craving
You

Slowly I unravel/The thorns of this life
Picking at the threads/Of my soul
Who will sow me back together/In the end?

The empty feeling was sweet relief
After all the months of pain
A hollow shell was better than
A whole person
Filled to the brim with aches and troubles
And submerged in misery
Release came from
The glint of the silver edge
And just a little sting
But too much
Too fast
Sent my head spinning
And though they have long since
All but faded from sight
If I could go back
If I could erase
These ugly scars
If I knew
I would never have let myself
Get lost like that

I woke up this morning
While the sun was still asleep
Before the dew dried
And as I began to reach the edge of consciousness
My fingers grazed the empty space beside me
Searching for the comfort of your warmth
But instead I was greeted with stiff sheets
And cool pillows
The groggy euphoria of the hope
That I was waking to your arms
Was short lived
And so with worn down feet
And shaking limbs
I rose to greet another day
Without you

His delicate notes
And symphonies
He plays
Drift through
The house
Filling the air
With sweet music
Melting my heart
Of stone
Bringing tears
That fill and spill
Out of my eyes
Like the spray of the ocean
And I wrap myself
In his love

Kiss me
Fully on
The mouth
Hold me
So tight it hurts
Until our bodies
Are no longer separate
But one
Please
Please don't let me go
You are a part of me
I need you
Like I need my lungs
Or my heart
(You are my heart)
I lean on you
When everything else
Falls out from under me
When I can't see my feet
You carry me
I need you
More than oxygen
You are my
Life support
Please
Please
Never stop loving me
Because I couldn't
Stop
Even if I tried

Love is a funny creature
Over time it
Morphs
Changes
Until you find
It must have been this way
All along

Three years old
Love was tucked in sheets
And pillows that smell of Momma's hair

Eight years old
Love was the grip of locked pinkies
And hushed giggles

Eleven years old
Love was the flutter in my stomach
And the sweat on my palms

Fourteen years old
Love was the foreign feel of his lips
Chapped and uncertain

Heart break follows
Small fissures in my heart
This was the first time I begin to see
How the world works
And the true meaning of deceit

Sixteen years old
Love is the beat of his heart
As he sleeps
The sweet sigh of my name
And the endless fall into each other’s eyes
Love is just the beginning
A promise
Around my finger
For a happily ever after
Love is a dance
Clumsy, learning
Moving to the rhythm
Of life
Love is beating all the odds
Distance
Time
None of it matters
It is still very new
And still growing

One day
Love will be
Nights spent wrapped in a lovers embrace
The coo of a newborn  
Early mornings
And soccer practice
Love will be
Bedtime stories
Russian lullabies
The Lord's Prayer  
And Irish ballads sung at bed side
Love will be
The hum of a toddler’s finger
Tapping the key of a piano
And the laugh of his sister
Who hangs on her mother’s apron
Love will be
Meeting 'the one'
And deciding he will never be good enough for her
Love will be
Worry as the key turns in the ignition for the first time
Prom dresses
And broken curfews
Love will be
Seeing him walk in his father’s foot steps
Watching her walk down the aisle
Watching their families grow
Love will be
Rocking chairs facing the rising sun
Brittle fingers still twined
And weary bodies swaying
Love will be
Standing tall
Before the golden gates
And together
Embracing eternity

I am restless
Yearning to stretch my shackled wings
To feel the wind streaming through my feathers
I long to be free
To be released into the blue above me
I watch you
With envious eyes
As you soar
Wings kissing the sun
And clouds clinging to your body
My spine quivers with desire
To chase
Glide alongside you
The bars close in
I am running out of room
I have long out grown my captivity
You watch me
With a wistful gaze
As you circle me
Waiting for the
Hour glass lock
To run out
That counts down the years
Months
Weeks
Days
Hours
Minuets
Seconds
Until I may join you

Hell is not
Fire and brimstone
Frozen
Or sheeted in ice
No,
Hell is
The hollow pain
Inside your stomach
From days spent staring at the walls
It is the panic
That sits on your chest
Crushing your sternum
Under the weight of his absence
The ache
In the marrow
Of your spine
As you wake to face
Another Mountain
Another Monster
Another Day
The terror of forgetting
How all his corners and edges
Feel beneath your finger tips
Or how the constellations
Glittered in the cerulean night
Of his eye
Hell is
The fear that
All the threads holding you together
Woven like tapestry
Will fray
And fall apart
The thought
Of your souls untwining
Pulled and picked apart
By time
Distance
And silence

He sees the world in corners and edges
And life is lived in still shots

Past the grizzle and grit he sees
The lovely framework
The bones of the earth

That sparkle of brilliance
Crashes in his eyes
Wonder colored blue

A little mind races
And I watch as his hands try to keep pace
A heart of glass and gold
Transparent
A prism of possibilities
The light it throws
Colors us in day dream

Thoughts like the tide
Rise and fall
Carving out the shoreline


An exquisite curse
A hideous blessing

A beautiful mind

If I die young
Bury me
Beneath the willow tree
Her tears will mourn me
To the end of time
Long after all those who cared
Are gone