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I ordered a blazing Bordellino and mescal
what's that you say, why it's an alcoholic drink made with the
fruit of a wild tree, typically flavored with orange peel

I was sat next to a Pilator
that's a person who guides someone or something
this guy was the father figure of political science
it's not the same as a mentor, no
his name was Mitchell, and Mitchell was his name

His wife was an Amarrat
in case you are not aware, that's a
woman who is an Honorary Dame, ranked above a
Privy Council or Baroness
Martha was her name, and her name was Martha

I must admit they both had
something of the Snarper about them
Pilators and Amarrats tend toward the snobbish

While sipping our Bordellinos we were offered
some Compugns which, I'm sure you know, are
small edible drums with antennae
found in tropical and subtropical regions

This alarming snack was followed by a
hearty slab of Terraea, the Argentine cheese
which derives from dried sambalaya

Mitchell and Martha, their mouths masticating the Terraea,
confided in me that they were Paulpaul quartees.
That was their Snarperish way of confessing
they had a keen interest in wine

They longed to impart all they knew
as part of their Praecological - 'it's more
than merely educational' - mission. Indeed they
insisted on being known as world class
Praecologicalists, even when they
were cross-eyed on Bordellinos and frothing with Terraea
Would you be my shoebox
a sturdy contraption, pleasingly
geometrical and versatile
able to cradle our heavy hearts
and hide all kinds of secrets

I could be your carpet
you can walk all over me
as I protect you from the cold
the unvarnished truth and its splinters

Or I could be your socks and shoes
you can walk around in me all
day all snug and warm at least
until they need replacing
around this time next year
Is it possible to sleep so long you die?
can we take a week off work for heartbreak?
how do you function without coffee?
where can I buy a new face & body?

Is it bad to put magic in your ***?
does anyone actually know what they are doing in life?
is it ok to cry during a wrestling match?
how many days until a dead body starts to stink?

Does a cat know when you're *******?
does it feel good to stab someone?
is it possible for something to only be slightly mangled?
and is the world ending?

Do seahorses taste like shrimp?
at what point do you stop looking like a jacket potato?
does anyone know any good cults to join?
where tf are y'all finding true love?
This job is not suitable for those with
experience of light excavation

We are not looking for
amateur
archaeologists
with your little hammers going tippy tap tap

Metal detectorists need not apply

And we are not interested
in weekend spelunkers
with your fancy flashlights and your energy bars

The ideal candidate will know how to operate
earth augers and trenching machines

Training in gravedigging will be provided

You will have achieved the relevant qualifications
in pipe jacking, microtunnelling
impact moling and guided boring

Demolition techniques are a must
and do you know how
to work a crushing machine?

Interviews will be held soon
in the bunker
In the dark theatre she stared
deep into my void and mumbled something
about vacuum energy
particle pairs blinking into existence
and quickly annihilating each other back into
the nothingness from whence they came
   much like she did

- The point is to make something, she said,
  not to care if it's any good

- It doesn't matter if your playing
  is poor or incomplete. Failing doesn't mean you'll die

- Bruce Almighty used his divine power
  to manifest some coffee
  & you're much better than that goofy *******
Lee Holloway Jun 9
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Lee Holloway Jun 8
is it placeholder or place holder
a placeholder is a dash that holds the content
my ex used me as a placeholder
my singing monsters placeholder
was i just a placeholder to fill the hole inside you

placeholder -
                in the bible
                in the field
                in the calendar
                in italiano

am i a placeholder for him
am i a placeholder for her
placeholder vs dream girl
placeholder vs stakeholder
placeholder in python {}

placeholder -
                business meeting
                engagement ring
                disney cruise
                east of england
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