I wish I could talk
To you it isn't easy
All things go amok
My stomach feels so queasy

I wish that I can chat
To you I'll be a speechless gnat
Every time I open my mouth
"NO!" my brain forever shouts

I wish I could be your everything
So that smiles on your face I bring
My chapped lips beckoning
My parched throat swallowing

For everything I wish
That we could be like this
I still fear and doubt
That with you...I'll be in a blackout

I feel as if my body is zinc and steel,
Heated to volcanic temperatures to be molded
And shaped into a train.
My body is made of all these strong, hardy metals.
It’s a body meant to pierce the winds and divide the landscapes
At a speed the eye cannot keep.
A body with a straight forward purpose;
To keep traveling and keep on shining.
Seems a lovely life doesn’t it?
Travel and wander the tracks day after day after day.
Experience the new time and time again while in one amazing physical body,
A body I can call mine.
But then what sounds continuously penetrate my metallic ears?
The shuffle of feet and the screams and cracks of tired, hot engines.
Never any QUIET!
At the very beginning it was exciting,
And stayed so for a while.
Then those new exciting sounds turned into merciless loud noise.
…
Tonight, I feel as though my body is a train made from zinc and steel.
Tonight, my mind feels like the noise and chaos of rushed steps and loud engines.
Tonight, I am a train that is screaming into the night.

If i told you i needed help
would you listen?
Or would your silence
Echo off the walls.
See my life is like a car,
Sometimes moving fast
And other times so **** slow.
If i told you i feel hurt inside
would you not just hear
but listen
to what i said
I need someone to care.
Im tired of trying to fight alone.
Im tired of trying to survive at a table for one.
If i told you
I cry all over my body
And each tear is a knife
And they are leaving scars on my flesh,
Would you cut me a bandage,
Sop up my blood,
Or leave me to bleed out.
If i told you
I was alone and my demons are taunting me
would you get me out
Or would you keep walking
or keep scrolling...
Im not begging for attention,
But one cannot be expected to be alone and silent like a life long detention.
If i told you
I was ready to confess everything
Come clean from my secrets,
Strip myself naked so you could see my imperfections
would you care even the slightest bit
Or are you so selfish
And so ignorant
To walk on
And leave this person to die.
If i told you i was ready to die
would you blame it in cliche,
Or believe it and save me from damnation
Its time to think.
It could be up to you
This isnt just my world,
Its yours, too
and dont you want to be
somebody
To someone?
I need you.
Because all of these "if i told you's
Are becoming
**im telling you

You and the clouds have a lot in common
so,
The tenuous cloud in the distance reminds me of you
Faint, nothingness.
You and the clouds are similar
I can see them but I'll never touch them
I'll never get close enough to the sky
To feel, exactly how amazing they are.

He asked me
if I could feel the pulling of the moon
Like I was the ocean
Standing Infront of him
I replied,
you are the moon
And I am the waves

Why be scared of something so simple as loving the person you love

I get shot with two worded responses that shatter my bones
I'm a mess on the inside
Bullet wounds are visible aren't they???????
I cant see the entree wounds but God ****** I can feel pieces of my ribs puncturing my lungs
I heave up blood, and gasp for air
I can tell from the look in your eyes you are losing your light
Were cracked and bruised
I keep putting super glue in the cracks to try to hold us together for the time being
But it isn't the same as it was before? Is it?
It's like we're trying to read our story out of a book
And shoving certain pages down each other's throats
Suffocating lullabies
I want it this way and you want it that way
It's like putting ketchup in milk
A never ending battle of trying to love the other right but never succeeding
A reversed fairytale