Came back
Survived the ride
Plunged into dark
Saw the light

I'm back!!!
I will now be posting
Regularly
I missed you all

I fell for a poet
An expert with his words
By night a whisper,
By day unheard

I fell for a poet
A hazy, giggly dream
A little boy in a teenager's body
A life ripped at the seams

I fell for a poet
Who's writing love poems I'll never read
For someone else in his life,
Anyone but me.

I fell for a poet
So I'll wait, quiet as the sea
For this feeling to fade
Or for him to fall for me

i draw with silver
lines, x's and spots
under a sleeve
so i never get caught

my canvas is my skin
and so with the blade i drag
across my peach paper
so they won't be mad

i'm sorry, mom
i'm sorry, dad
i'll never be the son you wanted to have
perfect grades,
happy and smart

i'm so sorry...
i'm sorry i have to tear us apart

Why is it so easy to complain,
To express my sorrow in a story,
Make my pain something beautiful,

But...

When I'm happy,
Which is a rare delight,
I can't find the words,
My mind goes blank,
And once that feeling goes away...
It's all forgotten

Why do I bear my sadness like armour,
Why can't I hold onto happiness,
And keep it from blowing away,
Like glittering ashes in the wind.

I hate the way I look
I hate the way I sound
But my broken feeling are bound
I hate the body in the mirror
I hate the tears running down
The end of me is coming nearer
Sorry I didn't stick around

You told me I couldn't,
so I did.

The world lies serene from up here,
bright blinding lights
seem dim,
people like insects, crawling
insects like dust, clinging
and scuttling to their dark corners.
A place above all
where I can forget.
As I watch my feet swing
over the edge,
I'm not scared nor sad,
not thrilled either,
Just am.

The colours of the world once danced for me,
But now they stand, all grey, though if they moved I’d barely see
Music painted dreams that nourished my soul,
But now it drowns the turmoil I can't control