Osiem metrów wysokości.
Pośrodku szczelina.
Rzeźba dziecka z betonu
obok kontury ciała i pustka
po bezbronnej istocie,
której już nie ma.

Szorstka struktura szarości
rani delikatną skórę.
Głód. Choroby. Samotność.
Świat zapomina o tych,
co nie krzyczą głośno—
o tym co najbardziej boli:
o miażdżonej niewinności,
i olbrzymach pilnujących
orszak przestraszonych wielkich oczu
w małych, wychudzonych ciałach.

Pamięć nie jest wygodna.
Ona fizycznie boli.
Uparte rany nie goją się.
Było.
Jest.
Wije się w sąsiednich otchłaniach Tartaru.

Aksjomat przyjęty przez aklamację:
„Tak ma być!”

Cisza.

Na scenę wychodzi syn ocalałego.
Łamiącym się głosem szepcze:
Tata przeszedł piekło, ale kochał nas.
Przeżył, napisał pamiętniki.
Dał świadectwo.
Rozumiał ten wykolejony świat.


BROKEN HEARTS

Eight meters high.
A crevice in the center.

A concrete sculpture of a child
and the deep void.
Once there was another child,
now gone without a trace…

The rough grey texture
hurts fragile skin.
Hunger. Disease. Loneliness.

The world forgets
those who do not scream
and what hurts the most:
crushed innocence
guarded by the giants
watching the procession
of terrified wide eyes
in small, gaunt bodies.

Memory is not a peaceful place,
it brings physical pain.
It gnaws from underneath.

Stubborn,
festering wounds,
they refuse to heal.

It was.
It is.
It will happen again
by axiom,
accepted without question.

That is how it must be.

Like a venomous snake
slithering near the lands of Tartarus.
Endless sacrifice, leaden silence.

And then, the son of the survivor takes the stage.
He speaks in a whisper:

My Father went through hell, but he loved us.
He wrote it down—
a testimony of a derailed world.

He knew what it meant to be human
when it hurt.

He survived to love and to be loved.

You know
In the hush between words
In the way a name
Feels lighter or heavier
On the tongue.

You know when it's love
Not by the flowers they bring
Bt by how they stay
When the pedals fall.

You know who's yours
And who's only passing
Through the hollow
Of your hope .

You know who holds you
With clean hands
And who touches you
With doubt.

You know who to trust
By the silence
That doesn't sting.

You know  who to choose
By how your soul softens
When they speak.

You always know
Before the goodbye
Before the first lie
Before the ache .

Even when you pretend
You don't
You do.

Because when it's real,
You never have to ask
Bt when it's not,
No answer ever fits


You know
You've always known.

Do you ever just ponder
And wonder of life
The splender of nature
Of wildlife?

Let the silence between us
bleed into / a space of absence
and unbury the flesh
within the violence /  
to part deep / the blackness
of starlings / heart held  
melting into the sun /
so beautiful / so cold
that even wings / the shape
of fire / eviscerate
into memory

I’m swimming in a deep ocean
Water in my ears
Mind spinning, drunk on bad omens
Getting harder and harder to hear

Repeating this swim despite my pleas
Changing currents fast
My oxygen depletes
And I’m stuck in the tangled trash

the other fish Are thriving well
Why is is only me?
Everyone else, feeling swell
While I am lost at sea

I’ve never felt so seen,  
I’ve never felt so bare.  
Yet this is the feeling  
I’ve longed for everywhere.  
You make me feel I matter,  
That I’m worthy of love,  
Deserving of attention,  
You make my spirit glow.  
My smile shines because of you,  
Your care brings light to me.  
The ways you show your love, so true,  
In countless forms I see.  
I ache to spend my days with you,  
More moments by your side.  
I don’t feel I deserve this love,  
Yet I’m grateful for its tide.  
It’s not your task to guard my heart  
Or watch me day and night,  
But baby, I’m so glad you’re mine,  
My sweet guy, my delight.

Most women
Want to stab me in the back
But she didn't
She was just confused
The moment she held the knife
The world went quiet
Her heart throbbed a little
Better to take the pain
Than to take a life
Right?

Fully cooked batter,
Sprinkle of half-baked sighs.
A recipe of truth —
Never a lie.

Throw out the salt;
Add aged cheese,
A dollop of sugar,
A dash of chilies.

Don’t mention the sweat,
Nor the quiet cries.
Because
It’s the recipe of truth —
Never a lie.

Serve the truth,
Or leave it dry.
Maybe a pinch of water,
But never a lie.

We talk about the
past like it's a
movie we
watched together.
You liked the
cinematography.
I didn't care for the
cruelty of the
protagonist.

We disagree on the
theme, and every
scene holds different
aspects of
symbolism for us.
I'm not sure I want
there to be a sequel,
despite the good
acting.

dehumanize
-making killing
easier.

You should have let me stalk you in your sleep
Awoke if it was me and let me keep
A bit of soul for my system of belief
Instead of proving worthy as a thief

And on that same day in the church's trash
Found so much wine we did not trade for cash
A drunken night to gaze upon your back
Did we make love or one of us attack

Would that were a night we slept
A promise somewhere wasn't kept

Walked down the road to Weird tonight
Haven't been there in a while
A wired jaw smiles not
Now my bones are in a pile

I CANNOT LOVE IN SILENCE
THE WORLD’S EARS MUST RING
FROM MY PROFESSION

I HAVE GONE MAD FOR YOU
I AM TOO FAR GONE
I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU

I believe I have reached a point
of creative decline. Been on HP
since 2013. Close to 350 poems.
I may have thought and said
about all I have to offer.

Hard to come up with any real
original worthy material, the
old well might have run dry.
Or maybe my brain is growing
addled. That happens in our 80s.

In idle times I will still look in
on you all. I have enjoyed my
time here and made some fine
and talented writer and poet
friends. Thank you.

Adieu good and gentle people.

The most beautiful flower will wither away!
But you my beloved, even in death your smile still lingers in my heart.
And your dazzling eyes still daunt me in my sleep!.

If what they say is true,
that there's always room for improvement, maybe the opposite is true as well.
Maybe there's room for failure too.
Don't misunderstand.
I'm not suggesting you don't try.
But life is a process.
And failure, mistakes,
they're as much a part as progress.
So, while it may never seem like an option,
I hope you come to find it's OK to fail.

Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office

                        What Could be More American than
                    Masked Secret Police in Unmarked Cars?

Perhaps the suggestion has already been made:
ICE’s Black Marias could lead the parade

Running —
Running —
Everywhere. 
No destination to be found?!
My heart longs,
For what cannot be satisfied;
With meaninglessness abound...in.
Stop!
Cease chasing after the wind. You'll n'er catch him.
Stop!

Take off that old self; 
With old thoughts and old patterns,
And patent yourself on Yahweh!

Because
My heart longs —
To play, to dance, to sing, to be free;
And find strays today!
Look up and see the new path before thee.

I am afraid that if I pluck every single bad part of me, then I won’t be me anymore.

Maybe that’s just who I am.

I am all the bad parts of me.

Are there levels to this?
Is there a hierarchy for morality?

In some way I think we all are just as equally messed up.
Simply that some are less immune to it.

Maybe I am everything wrong with me,
everything I have done,
hurt,
bruised,
is just a sliver of my true nature.

I tried to touch the stars last night
So i took a chair and turned off the light

I reached higher than I ever tried
I saw them already, so beautiful, I even cried

But I lost balance and the chair fell
The light went on, and I was back in my cell

i draw with silver
lines, x's and spots
under a sleeve
so i never get caught

my canvas is my skin
and so with the blade i drag
across my peach paper
so they won't be mad

i'm sorry, mom
i'm sorry, dad
i'll never be the son you wanted to have
perfect grades,
happy and smart

i'm so sorry...
i'm sorry i have to tear us apart

I was not trained for this—
no welcome packet, no handbook for gravity.
Just a name that clings like static
and a voice that trembles when spoken too clearly.

They asked me if I had room.
I said I had weather.
They asked me if I would disappear.
I said watch me smolder, and stay.

I have loved like a lighthouse
with no shoreline in sight,
signaling to anyone
who mistook reflection for return.

I’ve held their names
like breath under water,
carved pathways through others
just to find my own again.

But I do not sculpt.
I do not steal 'the good stuff'.
I inherit fire
and ask it if it remembers me.

If you see yourself in me,
look again—
I am not a mirror,
I am the window you opened
and forgot to close when the wind picked up.

Still, I arrive,
boots echoing in the hallway
of someone else’s myth,
offering only this:

I will not rewrite you.
I will not finish your sentences.
But I will stand here—
untranslated,
unsaved,
untouched by the need to be anything
other than true.

eventually the stars
all darken and die

there at the edge
of sea and sky

life is a voice
and silence death

divisible between
beat and breath

Some things are better off dead
Buried in the ground
The memories stuck in my head
Spiraling around and around

My soul sits in its tomb
My hopes are the coffin it lies in
My inner child is the surrounding gloom
My dreams are the flowers lying on the stone

My trauma make up the walls that surround
My pain is the drawings underground
My soul was buried with the shackles that bind me
I had to bury it all so it would let me breathe

You have to stop looking behind to look ahead
That’s why some things are better off dead

Troubled soul
Proclivities
Loneliness
Pretty please

Inner Harbor
Baltimore
Mr. Poe
4044

Misty rain
Seattle snow
Kinda tired
On we go

Yoko yo yo!

She will be partying
I will be drinking

She will be dancing
I will be cutting

She will be laughing
I will be bleeding

She will be talking with others
I will be watched over by others

Because She knows I'm not worth crying over
And I know She was my only and now it's over

On est moins seul au fond d'une église déserte :
De son père inquiet c'est la porte entr'ouverte ;
Lui qui bénit l'enfant, même après son départ,
Lui, qui ne dit jamais : « N'entrez plus, c'est trop **** ! »

Moi, j'ai tardé, seigneur, j'ai fui votre colère,
Comme l'enfant qui tremble à la voix de son père,
Se dérobe au jardin tout pâle, tout en pleurs,
Retient son souffle et met sa tête dans les fleurs ;
J'ai tardé ! Retenant le souffle de ma plainte,
J'ai levé mes deux mains entre vous et ma crainte ;
J'ai fait la morte ; et puis, en fermant bien les yeux,
Me croyant invisible aux lumières des cieux,
Triste comme à ténèbre au milieu de mon âme,
Je fuyais. Mais, Seigneur ! votre incessante flamme,
Perçait de mes détours les fragiles remparts,
Et dans mon cœur fermé rentrait de toutes parts !

C'est là que j'ai senti, de sa fuite lassée,
Se retourner vers vous mon âme délaissée ;
Et me voilà pareille à ce volage enfant,
Dépouillé par la ville, et qui n'a bien souvent
Que ses débiles mais pour voiler son visage,
Quand il dit à son père : Oh ! que n'ai-je été sage !