frozen to the marrow
an icy, hollow core
to juxtapose the vessel
through the cosmos we sore
closing in on an answer
orion serves his sword
to slit the adam's apple
before the stars can tell us more

i never dared to call when you're asleep
another knife next to the card inside your sleeve
your laugh like cyanide everytime i tried to make you see
the darker half that conceivably convinced my wrists to bleed

the sussuration of life outside my window let's me know i'm still alive. 'took the dive', it's been described less eloquently from time to time. the murmur of the wind in conversation that never ends with the whisper from the trees 'til mr. winter eats their leaves. but i survived, i mean just look at me. alive and took a drive, packed the car five stories high with all the people, places, things and love i would've left behind. from now on, i decide.

i pray i'm imagining things.
neurons firing, burning me.
the brakes on this freight car start to scream.
real life breathing into my dreams,
fanning the flames in the evergreens.
real pain where it's not supposed to be.

she smiled
but it didn't reach her eyes
the weight of gold
and everything else inside

the most precious stones
i've throw into the lake
to skip and wish to elevate
with nothing less than my love
as if that's ever been enough.