my most toxic trait is thinking

     everything will work out.


haven't died yet

     must be doing something right or

getting very lucky.

Dear stranger,
I have never met you before
never seen you smile
never held your hands
never looked in your eyes

To me, you are just a stranger
nothing else at all
then why do you
not feel like a stranger at all?

I have never seen your face before
never seen your eyes
yet I feel like I know
your soul
and everything inside

So tell me, why is this so
is it because we are
not strangers at all..?

I was okay for so long
I should've known it would go wrong

Tell me your secrets
Tell me your sorrow
All of your regrets
Your dreams of tomorrow
If I asked you to stay
What would you say
Would you tell me right away
Or make it a game we play

I was made to be on top by God,
But I became a tool that only nods.
I see myself — I know I’m better,
But I can’t control it… and that’s what’s bitter.

I want to live as my true self,
But became someone who hides from himself.
I knew I needed a pause, a break,
But they yelled, “Stop? For God's sake?”

So I paused… and quietly broke.
Now I can’t hit back — I’m sinking slow.
In a lake of silence, deep and wide,
I watch the real me — float outside.

Last night I poured a cup of tea
For every problem wrong with me.
And when the list of guests was up,
For me was left an empty cup.

always surrounded by people
but I'm so lonely
always trying to talk
but no one hears me
I try to explain
but no one understand even my family
I'm so tired no one sees me

Bad day
Bad week
Bad month
Bad year
Bad…life?

Suffocating silence

Lonely
I am alone

They are there-
But they don’t even know

The weight of the world on my shoulders

Is it just me?

It can’t just be me…

I wish I lacked empathy.
I don’t want to feel.
I don’t want to see signs.
I don’t want to be real.

One minute, I’m fine—
then my soul explodes in my chest.
I wish I didn’t see that.
But I did. And now, no rest.

I wish I could shrug,
say “that’s not my concern,”
but every flicker of pain
Causes my stomach to hurt.

I notice the silence,
the shift in your tone—
there's nothing in your voice
It's all I think about alone.

This is why I'm standoffish and stick to just me
There's no ache in loneliness
At least not the kind that stings

Maybe I'll make friends but that feels like betrayal
These self imposed rules- a safe fortress failure

I wish I didn’t feel
At least not to this extent
My day was going so good
But I ruined it again