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 May 2013 Andrew Robertson
Alison
I love the passion love brings
But that too many are scared to share
That first moment when something clicks
As if you know fate’s come your way

I love watching the layers of shelter peel away
So all that’s left is the raw being
Where that unbreakable bond is formed
And the pieces combine to form something new

I love when the flutters are gone,
Stored away for new obstacles
The reassurance that you are special
Opens up a world you were too frightened to enter before

I love the patience and understanding love brings
The crossing of barriers
To meet somewhere I’ve never been
A cultural exchange in an entirely new language

But what I love of love most of all
Is that plunge into a dark abyss
Where predictability is erased from the picture
And a whole new story is forged
I built a Berlin Wall around my heart.
Not to keep others out,
but to keep myself in.
I built the walls higher
until no light could get in
and I stayed there.
I may have been alone
but at least I was safe.
Safe from you and your sugar coated words and electric touch.
Protected from the lies that seeped from between your lips,
and god, just your lips.
I kept myself away from your impish charm and devilish smile.
I had to,
I couldn’t let you in
Because when you broke me the first time
I could hardly manage
to pick up the fragments
and build them into something that at least resembled the girl I had been before.
A shell of what it was.
I added armour.
Heavy chainmail to keep me away from your beckoning embrace.
Was it worth it?
I’m not sure.
But the over flow of emotions
that I swam through every time I saw you
was drowning me.
So I built a raft and let it take me away.
I put myself here but now I’m trapped,
stuck in my own mind and stuck in my own heart.
It’s a terrible place to be.
Trust me,
you wouldn’t want to be here with me.

— The End —