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  Dec 2014 Andrew Quilles
Cnk
I’m empty and I like it
Every now and then
I search my soul
Only to find what I’ve known

I’m prone to feeling alone
It’s not something that I condone
Like a shadow in the dark
I disappear to where
No one can hear

I feel a certain kind of sad
One not for everyone
The mellow entrancement pulls me under
Thunder comes from above
I’m stuck in the slow drizzle of an oncoming storm
But unlike everyone else
I don’t want out

Some call it misery
I prefer to understand it as bliss
No one to bring you down
No one to keep you up
The emptiness inside
Only makes me feel more alive

-Cnk
  Dec 2014 Andrew Quilles
Just Melz
"You can't really love someone you've never met."


          He's the first thing on my mind
   when I open my eyes,
             the last thing I think about
    before I go to sleep,
           he's in my thoughts all
    the moments in between,
his face takes away the nightmares
             and fills all my dreams.
       *
How is this not love?
  Dec 2014 Andrew Quilles
Just Melz
You,
who used to touch me where I didn't want you to, reaching inside me, where I'd *never
let anyone before, I was only eleven, I shouldn't of been treated like a *****...
   I hate you

You,
who took advantage of me, when I was just thirteen, taking what innocence and trust that I had left, breaking my spirit down to an empty shell...
   I hope you rot in H£LL

You,
who just watched what they did to me, judging me, saying it's my fault for dressing slutty. I was only fourteen...
I hope I'm never like you

You,
who made me believe I was not a used rag doll, gave me trust and hope, only to reach my sixteen year old core, then ripping it all to shreds like never before...
I'll never forgive you

You,
who said you loved me, made me think it was the real thing, helped me forget the past, at only eighteen, you gave me my wings and hope that it would last, then when you realized I just wasn't enough, you went and found some different lust, at twenty-five, you decided you wanted a new life,  but our kids mean the world to me, so I can't regret you, but I can erase your memory...
I hope she cheats on you

You,
who finally made me think I'd found the real thing, then broke me down, then picked me up just to throw me down again, over and over, then used the fragile remaining shards of my heart to cut out my soul and leave me falling apart...
I wish you nothing but pain and despair

You,
who I laugh and joke with now, who I wish to know more, who makes me scared I'll end up with a broken heart like before, who seems to truly care...
Please, don't forget how fragile I am
        
You,
who I may or may not have met yet, don't hurt me, don't make me regret. I won't be able to handle losing another, I wanna be happy with you, I wanna know forever...
**I hope you'll love me too
I've never written about a few of the things mentioned in this, it was quite difficult for me, Tbh.  Feedback would be greatly appreciated.  
Thank You.
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