crawl
across the gasp
open wide, taste
******* lushiously
open me, take me

lose myself, forget
just a moment, quicken, last
I want it, stretch it, me
pin me, twist me, hold me
I want you, I hate you
need, lust, desire
fire, want, heal

from behind, such a gift
strong, strong hands
grasp, grip, take
hold you deep
power, depth

again and again, again, again
spill, wet, and taste again
me on top, then you again
desperate for love
I love your ****
just for a time
I'll never ask

then its off and away
back to running from
never to, never, no
back in your box
I hate me; man

In Benidorm there are melons,
Whole donkey-carts full

Of innumerable melons,
Ovals and *****,

Bright green and thumpable
Laced over with stripes

Of turtle-dark green.
Chooose an egg-shape, a world-shape,

Bowl one homeward to taste
In the whitehot noon :

Cream-smooth honeydews,
Pink-pulped whoppers,

Bump-rinded cantaloupes
With orange cores.

Each wedge wears a studding
Of blanched seeds or black seeds

To strew like confetti
Under the feet of

This market of melon-eating
Fiesta-goers.

A homeless man used to sit on the sidewalk near the grocery store
But now he's gone

My best friend used to smile
But her smile is now gone

Birds used to sing outside my window
But now they're gone

The sun used to shine into my room but now I've closed the curtains

Because the love that we had is gone

There used to be love in this world but now it's gone

I'm in love with you
Though I feel I hardly know you
The distance makes me feel
Unaccustomed to who you are
We live separate lives
How could our love last
All the way to the end of time
It is unrealistic
And for more than just that reason
What I want from you
I feel you cannot provide
Not because you aren't capable
But simply because you aren't mine
You belong to the world
You belong to yourself
You shouldn't have to answer
To anyone else
You're far too innocent
To carry on with this
Maybe I should let you go
But the direction I should take
I really don't know
I'm waiting for a sign
Something crystal clear
Until I see it
I'll always be living in fear
Afraid that our relationship will fail
And I end up alone

i see the rain dancing across the windowpane as we sit in a small cottage kitchen. a game of scrabble sits before us and tea was never our strong suit so even though we are twenty-eight and still growing up now, we fiddle with our mugs of hot chocolate to keep our hands from shaking.
the blanket around my shoulders reminds me of when we were just kids, seventeen and stupid, curled in your bed. i kept it after all this time in the hopes that i will be able to get your scent back. when i saw you and we hugged and i invited you here, my whole body shivered with desire because the tantalising taste of cinnamon was still there on your skin. i wanted to kiss you like mad on that chilling, teeth-chattering cold street, but as i tried to warm your fingers in mine i told you i had a boyfriend.
this is where we sit, reminiscing in his kitchen while he is out working, and i wonder if i’ll make you leave before he comes home, or if we’ll both leave and be halfway across the country before he realises i have packed up everything i own and my car is no longer in the driveway.
when i close my eyes and think of england i think of that chance i never took.

Please don't go.

Please...