It's been a full day
now I see the full moon
from the chair I'm sitting
by my bedroom window.
My head is so full,
I'm filling one more glass
to fill the void in me
and fool my restless soul.

When I'm not sad or angry
I'm not feeling anything
and people whisper "he's so weird"
'cause they don't know what it means.
I've gotten so much advice
on the "life I'm living"
that sometimes I wonder if they
secretly know all about me.

When I was younger I saw something
running on an alley right behind me,
it wasn't a person, it wasn't an animal,
a thing is the only way I can describe it.
I was with a cousin and both of us ran
most importantly, both of us saw
and to this day we can't forget.
It was all black and had bright red eyes
the shape was like a person's but way bigger.
What would've happened if we hadn't escaped?
Where would we be if one of us stayed?

Why do I still worry
when time is all that I need?
I'm afraid if I decide to wait,
refusing to do a thing,
my life won't move at all
and I'll be bound to fall.

The dress was blue and black,
life is really short,
I don't always get drunk
but when I do I go to church.
Is Keanu Reeves a vampire,
or is he a time traveller?
They told me to change my ways
and I don't remember what I did then.

I'm here to tell y'all sad news,
so brace yourselves for the lines to come:
Everything is okay
disappointed sigh
How has my life come to this point???
Yes, you read this right,
I don't like to feel so good, I shouldn't feel so fine,
I need problems in my life
or else... what the f* will I write about?

Waking up from a good dream
is a terrible way to  start the day,
imagine having a good time
and then being carried away.

And as soon as I realized
I was back to real life
I tried desperately to fall back asleep
but there was no going back.

How far did I go this time
with this impulsive trait of mine
so that I had to be locked up?
Did I run away from cops,
did I not run fast enough,
did they take me home handcuffed?
Why's my favorite cousin here,
what is that that you all fear
that I'll do with my own life?
I was just trying to have fun,
somehow it got out of hand
and I almost went to a psych ward.

How can you look into someone's eyes
and tell them they have a whole life ahead
when the future is so uncertain,
life is so random,
and tomorrow they could be dead?

I know I've come a long way
so if at least once you'd say
"I'm proud of you" instead of "try harder"
I'd at least once ask you to stay.

Today's poem is for a guy,
the guy who was "living the good life",
drove a nice car and had a hot wife,
this one's for that "rich guy".

They say on the news that he's dead,
"fell off a rooftop" they said,
"such a tragic premature death",
some say he was really depressed.

On his IG stories he was always fine,
if anyone asked "he was alright",
he was only 23 but how old was he inside?

How much longer could his life have been
if only the people around him had seen
the obvious dead eyes behind that smile?

How many more tragic funerals
will people have to attend
until they learn to teach their sons
that sometimes it's okay to cry?

We're living on borrowed time
so love it and lose it,
doubt it and prove it,
live and die on the road,
I mean, maybe not literally,
or maybe yes, who knows?
What I'm trying to say
is that we're not here to stay
so let's all let it go.

I've been leaving pieces of me
scattered all around my world,
it's a mess I don't think I can clean.
I wonder if someday someone will be able to solve the puzzle
and meet all of me.

I've seen that side of you,
that side you don't always show,
the side not even you can control,
that part buried deep inside.
And even if I saw your worst
I don't think I'd ever forget
the truthful look in your eyes
that convinced me that was you.

I once told a wise guy I was tired
he said "dude, we all are!"
"and how the hell do we survive?"
"shot by shot, pill by pill, we fight."

Don't make me wait in line
for whatever I want to take.
I want it right away
I'm tired of having to wait.
Wait for the right time
wait for the right one
wait for the right weather
life's all about wait,
and I'm too much of an immediatist
to follow rules and wait for commands.

I used to believe
in the fairytales you told.
They used to take me back to you
and your sadistic desire
to fool me some more.

I don't recognize this face in the mirror,
this didn't use to be me,
what am I?
How far away am I?
All the damage I've seen,
all the harm I've done,
maybe I deserve to be uncertain.
All the life has been ****** out of me,
I might've done this to myself,
I could be held accountable.
I try to be smart enough to show what's inside,
I don't believe I am,
no words seem to be enough to show what I mean.
Is this all just selfish of me?
Narcissism, is it what this is all about?
Not everything is about me,
why do I feel all the pain?
Can anyone tell me what this is all about?
I'm scared, hopeless, and alone.
Every sentence might be the last.