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Human, caring, sweet, and true
These words mean a lot to you
I am not who I say I am
Everything you know about me is a sham

One, Two Three,
Why do you believe in me?
Four, Five, Six,
I'm no more than a pile of sticks

My rhymes are childish
And so are my thoughts
Everything I say
Comes out ******* in knots

This is not a poem
Nor is it a song
This is not a story
Yet you keep singing along

Why can't you leave?
Why must you stay?
Why must you sit there,
day after day?

Waiting, whispering, hoping, crying
Begging that this won't be my final letter
Holding tight onto that sweater
Praying that we'll last forever
Wishing that you could have done better
read it again but as a nursery ryhme. what do you think this nursery rhyme is about?

It wasn't your fault.☀️❤️‍🩹
We care, they say
but they'll punish you for feeling

We care, they say
but they'd rather you shut up

We care, they say
but we'll dismiss your complaints

We care, they say
but we'll degrade your every mistake

We care, they say
but don't cry or we'll force you to leave

We care, they say
but stay in your seat and stay quiet

We care, they say
but if you ever mess up we'll never forget it

We care, they say
until red ink stains your paper

We care, they say
but they don't notice it if you bleed in the bathroom

We care, they say
but they'll ignore the scars and the bruises

We care, they say
but our hands our tied by the system

We care, they say
but you can tell their eyes are cold

We care, they say
but they won't let go if you tell them it hurts

We care, they say
but we'll create systems that drown you in debt

We care, they say
but if you're hurt it's always your fault

We care, they say
but we'll add so many rules you can't breathe

We care, they say
but they'll charge you for feeling anything

We care, they say
but they ignore it until you start popping pills

We care, they say
but if you step out of line there's no fixing you

We care, they say
but they'll drown you in debt for needing help

We care, they say
even as they tear down what you need to live

We care, they say
but they stand idle as the world burns around them

We care, they say
but they'll black out the ****** history

We care, they say
but they'd let you starve while they feast

We care, they say
but if you drown it's not their fault

We care, they say
but not until it's their blood on the pavement

We care, they say
but the system is at fault and never them

We care, they say
but they tied their own hands when they agreed
the system is broken and it's killing people
I tried to get over my hate for you
the same way someone would get over
a phobia
Halfheartedly
and with the feelings of fear and hate lingering still
even after I tried to convince myself they were gone
WHAT WILL IT TAKE
TO MAKE YOUR TOUCH GO AWAY
I CANNOT SHED MY RUINED SKIN
IS THIS THE END OR DID YOU JUST BEGIN?

I WANT MY BODY BACK
I WANT MY LIFE
I WANT MY HEART BACK
I WANT MY KNIFE

MEMORIES AND SCARS
DECORATE MY BRAIN
REGRET AND STARS
CALM THE PAIN

SNAKES FEAR ME
DOGS LOVE ME
I AM NOT ME
YOU HAVE RUINED ME

I AM ROTTING INSIDE AND OUT
I PEEL MY SKIN AND BURN MY TONGUE
JUST TO FILL THE HOLE THAT YOU DUG
JUST TO FORGET WHAT YOU HAVE DONE
you deserve to rot.
do you know what its like
to wake up every morning
and be disappointed that your eyes open?
that your heart still beats
and there is still air going into your lungs?

if so I am so so sorry.
I'll be smarter this time
I'll hide the scars under a cuff of beads
bracelets and jewelry
shiny things I adore so much
because if you find the blood again
I won't hesitate to tell you the truth this time
that I've relapsed again
because you make me want to die
can't wake up,
it´s not a dream,
trying to escape it,
with no way out,
just dissociating,
disconnecting from the world,
the feelings,
the thoughts,
from everything,
entering the void,
a simple retreat,
only I am there,
a time out
I am peaches, the color purple and weeping willows
summer, pool parties and fireworks
I am roses, dark chocolate and cranberries
true crime documentaries and spicy books
I am mountains and rushing creeks
long runs and misbehaving hair
I am the scent of strawberries and watermelon jolly ranchers
huge libraries and rain
I am dandelions and volleyball
homemade jellies, pasta and long hot showers
I am photography, pencil lead and llamas
scrapbooking, gardening and shiny things
I am beaded bracelets, ripped jeans and hoodies
mascara and braids, bruises and scratches
I am all that I am
I hope that maybe some of you will recreate this and tell me all that YOU are! Let me know in the comments or in a message if you made a poem like this! I would be interested to read it!
Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com
Dispatches for the Colonial Office


                                           Died While Trying

                                  (prompted by an idea by Nagi)


                     “Every day you play with the light of the universe”

                                                 -Neruda

          
The glory of killing an old man already dying
Is heralded by the clinking of colorful medals
As a president is helped into his Mercedes
By white-gloved lieutenants wearing golden aiguilettes

The old man dying in his bed was a challenge to evil
Through the love-letters of freedom he wrote to the world
Ambassadors of hope that could not be recalled
Just as a subtle injection cannot be withdrawn

A flowering of ideas in verses freely exchanged
Crushed beneath boots polished by frightened houseboys
Pablo Neruda
Mr. Selfish loves himself
He doesn't care about anyone else
All he does is spew spew spew
About how much better he is than you

Mr. Selfish is a liar
He doesn't care if your mind is on fire
All he cares about is himself
And couldn't give a **** about anyone else

Mr. Selfish pretends to be sweet
He fools everyone into thinking there's nothing to defeat
If you are hurt he wouldn't cry
In fact he'd laugh and wish you'd die

Mr. Selfish is my name
I am evil and I am insane
All I care about is myself
Everyone else can go **** themself.
narcissistic episode
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