3 years in the making:

3 years you’ve cared for me

I hope I did the same for you

3 years you made me laugh

With our dumb jokes and antics

3 years I’ve thought of you

When seeing cottage cheese clouds

3 years I’ve called you

When I had something important to say, good or bad

3 years you made amazing

Simply with your presence

3 years you’ve tried to pay for me

And I’ve stubbornly refused

3 years I’ve watched you

Grow up into a man

3 years you showed me

What the love of God looks like, unconditional and unfailing

3 years of goofy photos

That I will never delete

3 years that you and I made millions of mistakes

And I wouldn’t change a single one

Because my favorite moments comprise those 3 years

And I would wait another 3 for just 1 more

You spent so much time preserving your youth that you forgot to use it.

The future worries me:
all of the unknown possibilities.
Indecision overcomes my mind,
at the time I most need it precise.

I even cried tonight,
looking at a list of courses:
mystifying options that I may not have
if I can’t write the essay right
or get the shiniest recommendations.

So I am worrisome,
for the next month and year.

I am worrisome because I want nothing more
than to be part of that place,
and to belong among those people.

He remembered a detail—
just one.

And somehow that was enough…

to make up for everything he forgot.

I’m at a stand-still with you.

You ask for my advice.
I give it.

You don’t like it.
I offer something different.

Not good enough.
Then figure it out yourself.

I need your help.
Then I need you to accept it.

I paddle this verbal boat forward.
And you paddle it back.

We’re not really going anywhere.
Just making a splash.

but hope too has a powerful current,
strong enough to move me towards things
I believed I was too weak for.

hope resects the doubt from my body,
and makes the lack of air in my lungs bearable,
until I reach the shore.

and hope, reminds me that there is more.
more to see,
more to experience,
more wonder than dread.

so I’ll do my best to surrender the doubt,
and adopt the hope instead.

Arms linked, thoughts linked
One person in two bodies

𖠋𖠋

They crack the same jokes,
They sing the same songs

It's difficult to belong
Among people that are linked

𖠋𖠋  𖠋

But today, you took my arm in yours,
Adjoined me to your chain

Today I felt like one of you—
If only for a little while

𖠋𖠋𖠋