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can I protect myself, from myself
such a folly when nobody is your worry
except the demon inside
 Jul 2011 Regan Troop
Moriah Jean
Your words captivate me.
And I'm a sucker for words...

I have the strangest urge
To just watch you do anything.
You fascinate me.

I want to memorize the way you move --
Because I've never seen it before,
And I don't want to forget.

I want to know your scent.
Close my eyes and breathe...
I'll imprint you in my memory.
You're intoxicating.

I want to fight against you --
Feel your passion,
Anger?
Strength.
It's palpable; It's suffocating.

I want to lay in bed
And listen to you talk
For hours.

Your words captivate me.
And I'm a sucker for words.
© January 2nd, 2011 Moriah Jean

For Bryant.
 Jul 2011 Regan Troop
Jay Jimenez
Death teased me once
as the Grim Reaper tickeled my arm pit
felt the Pit of Hell pour out my wrists.
Blood looks beautiful splattered on white
like a graffitti painted by a hoodlem in the dead of night
My eyes rolled backwards in my head
My skin went cold as the bathroom tiles
devil cracked its cunning smile
but short lived
towels wrap around wrists
carried out the house
to a ambulance
where my run in was turned to a sickness
depression
medication
a new living hell
Copyright JaMRock
 Jul 2011 Regan Troop
Jon Tobias
Rabo Karabekian said all our souls are neon tubes of light
If that is true
I know mine always flickers
Especially when I am scared
And if you knew Morse code
My soul would flash to you

“LOVE ME”                                                                                  

If you place your hands on my chest
You would see
My heart beats

“FREEDOM”                                                                              

The broken Braille of the goose bumps
That I get when I am cold
They say

    “HOLD ME”                                                                            

If you were blind
And you
Dragged your hands across the terrain of my face
Every pock mark and scar
Would make you think I was the moon
And when you got to my mouth
Warm from the breath I try to hold
When you’re near me
You’d realize
There really is a man in there

Underneath the warning signs
And flashes of light
When the sounds from the pleads for help stop
And you can finally hear me breathin’
You’ll see the message that I was supposed to give to you
Read what it says on my skin

“Underneath is a man                                                                        
Who keeps the dark and the stars to his back so he can always face you                              
Some days his distance feels cruel                                                          
Some days his smile is ugly                                                                  
But his heart                                                                            
When it’s not beating so hard that it’s beggin’                                              
For freedom                                                                              
It’s full of love                                                                            
There is still dust in his lungs                                                              
For he does not use his voice much                                                        
But he can hold you like a lullaby”
 Jul 2011 Regan Troop
Jon Tobias
When I lived in the hospital

Once a week a woman came and read to me

Then I read to her

And every week she asked me

what I wanted to be when I grow up

I always answered

With all the seriousness of a little boy

Who wanted to one day be a man

Could muster

“I am going to be a super hero”

The kind that can control the forests

so I could build everyone houses

Or be like Jesus with the fishes

so no one would ever be hungry

I wanted to be strong like my father was

I wanted to be brave

I told her how I was happy for the chemotherapy

Because  nuclear radiation usually only makes villains

Told her

How after the nurses injected me

My body felt like fire

And how I hoped

it would give me the power to control my body temperature

That way

If I ever held anyone

They would never have to be cold

And if you asked me now

What I want to be when I grow up

I’d tell you

I still want to be a super hero

I want to fight back the darkness

With all the strength of the sun

Or wrestle your demons

Or talk to animals

Even if it was just bunny rabbits

I’d find use for it

But I can’t do any of those things

I know we never become what we thought we would when we were kids

I don’t have a skylight calling me to action

Or extra senses alerting me to danger

I barely have my normal senses

I do have this though

A super power I call a cell phone

It’s always on

And I’ll always answer

Because

I at least got enough presence

To keep you from falling asleep alone

And enough spark in my heart to set my words on fire

Enough soul in the songs that I sing

To keep you from leaving again

Enough fat on my bones that I’m comfy to lay with

So if you’re lonely

Or tired

If you need a ride home

Or want me to back you in a fist fight

Or just need a friend

I have this magical thing that I call an ear

Mine

It listens so well

So pick up your super power I call a cell phone

And call me
 Jul 2011 Regan Troop
Jon Tobias
Her bones sound like the shaky clink of a glass teacup

On a glass plate

And she’s trying to keep it all steady

Her eyes are blue and huge inside her glasses which

I hope make me look as larger than life as she pretends I am

As I pretend to be

Even though it’s against protocol

I hold her hand as we walk through the aisles

And it feels like that one time paper became human

And asked you to pretend it was

Just long enough to know what love felt like

I wanted to tell her I love her

“You’re so sweet,” she said

“So handsome”

“Such a nice smile” she said

I wanted to push the red beaming sun of my face to her cheek

so she could feel me blush

First we looked for hair spray

And then we looked for lipstick

Her favorite chocolate

Which she confided tasted like ****

But she had to stick to sugar free now

And then we looked for her arthritis medicine

Adult diapers

A bedside ******

Please take the years I am not using

I’d die young to keep you here a little longer

To fight back the dust in your bones

And the paper of your skin

I want you to wake up every morning

So when I ask you how your day has been

You can say more than

“Well

I woke up again”

******* lady

If you knew what I would do to stop this

Her smile never fades

No shame hidden in the wrinkles of her face

I let her out the back so she can get to the street corner faster

“Such a nice young boy” She says

And I just want to tell her

I love her
I feel the weight on my mind;
the crack in my heart,
the sickening feeling...
as it all falls apart.
Before our eyes,
we’ll sever the ties;
have I told you I’m sorry?
About all the lies...

And I get so dizzy,
as days roll on,
I don’t think I can take,
just one more dawn.
And I get light headed,
it’s easy to see,
when I think of what we used to be.

If I could go back,
just one more time,
and re-live my life;
with your hand in mine,
I think I’d be perfect.
I wouldn’t be scared.
But those are just pictures,
of the life we once shared.
So.

If only the sun would take me!
if only the wind was on my side!
I’d have the wind take me away,
and the sun would stop the burning inside.

Because I feel like I’m on fire,
with rage and pain and sadness...
It’s only you that I’ve admired;
and it’s driving me to madness.

But I don’t regret who we used to be,
and here, I’m so, alone.
It’s just the pain’s too much for me,
and I hope you’ll never know.

‘Cause I’d give up the world for you,
I’d take away the hurt.
But now you’ve walked away from me,
you’ve left me in the dirt.

But even so,
I hope you know,
I’ll always be right here.
I’m waiting for,
Our love to soar,
So take away our fear.
 Jul 2011 Regan Troop
Katy Walker
The world is a stage

The Sun-- a spotlight

Brightening your starry smile

The wind—an orchestra

Breathing life into the path you dance

Each day I see the end as a sunrise

A standing ovation for your laughter

As you drift into sleep

The curtain hushing all sound
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