I don’t want to die,
I want to cease to exist.
To never have been born
And never have lived
For my soul and body to disappear
For any memory of me to be gone
To dissolve into nothingness and
Never have been anything at all

do hands deserve fingers
if they do not hold
do ears deserve sound
if they do not listen
do eyes deserve sight
if they do not see

do you deserve love
if you broke me

I don't want this to be
Like a movie I'd see
I want the good, the bad
And all the boring in between.

when you make another one
don't forget to recycle what's left of me,
don't forget to pay the copyright fee
just in case i rise from the grave
to reclaim what's mine.

when you look in her eyes,
does the lack of knowledge excite you more
than all of my suffering could before?
does she still respond to my name
or do you get to pick a new one?

she's not me, but i wish she was.
see, it really was you and me both
tired of the lack of variables,
but it felt like we were getting close.
now it's your turn to figure it out.
and if worst comes to worst,
do remember,
you can always make another one.

I smell rain and wet pavement
and sun
As I dance and I float
and I run
I hear laughter and cries
and song
As the sky’s colors bleed
into dawn
I watch as purples and pinks
fade away
As calm blue settles
over the day
I feel fresh air and dirt
underneath
As the spring I’ve so missed
breaks through the trees
I taste sweet berries and love
on my tongue
As freedom and bliss burn through me
like ***

the birds chirp in the distance
the sun glows bright
in the cerulean sky
no clouds in sight
just sunshine
beating down on your skin
sweat trickles down your brow
a slight breeze
sways the grass
around your ankles